Nameless Bond
by DreamingSilverfox
Summary: Yoite, broken, failing, yet a creature given as a blessing.  Ever apathetic Miharu was never one to speak his mind. However, when it finally becomes too much to hold back his feelings, will the bond be broken? -Reloaded-
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Nabari no Ou and all of its' characters belong rightfully to Yuhki Kamatani.

**Well, it certainly has been a long time since I last chose to work on this story. Nameless Bond was originally posted under my old account which no longer exists. After a long and tedious year, I had little to no time to work on this, however, now that things have finally calmed down, I plan on striving for a finish!**

**To those of you who have read from the beginning, I do have to warn that throughout these reposted chapters, I have done a bit of rewriting for some. Nothing major, but a few add-ins and re-wording.**

**Well, enjoy!**

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Indifferent eyes had yet to shift. Not a sound was heard for hours, and for some reason, it brought a strange sense of comfort to him. The others had left long before for the night, leaving the boys alone to rest. Rest, however, seemed a pointless attempt by this time.

Miharu exhaled quietly through his nose, as for a moment his forest-toned eyes slid to a close. Lately it had become difficult to shut his mind off enough to allow sleep. Thoughts plagued his mind in unsolved riddles and at the end of the day, all he wanted to do was to forget. Forget everything, forget that this entire mess had begun weeks prior and forget that he was the sole reason it had begun in the first place. No..that was wrong. The Shinrabansho was the cause. He was merely the victim. Wrong too, was his hope of erasing the past. There would always times he'd wished didn't exist, but he also knew there would be those memories he would never willingly give up.

His eyes opened, only to drop at the sight below.

Gentle fingertips fluttered feather-light over the pale cheeks of the slumbering boy whose head rest in the lap of his companion. Miharu's soft gaze barely left the place where his fingers danced so lovingly upon

Yoite's skin, finding an odd sort of serenity in simply being allowed to touch the older boy so tenderly. It was the rare moments like these that he loved so much and cherished.

It had been an unusually warm night, which was surprising considering just nights before the ground had been coated white with glistening snow. Though he found it to be a comfortable temperature for the season, he still was not blind to the shivering that had taken over his friend, nor was he unaware of the shortness of breath or the slight sheen of dampness across the other's forehead. Almost every night for the past week he'd come down with a fever. Yoite's condition was worsening by the second, and Miharu knew it.

Thoughtful green eyes remained loyal to their gaze though the caressing hand came to a slow as a gentle smile touched his lips. The fever was finally breaking.

Almost as if on cue, the moment those gentle fingers halted their movement, a pair of deep blue eyes fluttered open beneath dark lashes upon ivory cheeks to look questioningly up at him.

"How did you sleep?" Miharu asked softly, moving his hand away to place it at his side. He knew there were many times when the older boy would awaken from his sleep in a panicked state, and he didn't want to startle him if that was the case. Though, to his relief, Yoite merely closed his eyes a moment longer before carefully sitting up and brushing some of the loose ebony tresses that blocked his view. The teenager didn't answer, simply shaking his head.

Apathetic green continued to watch Yoite, though within the depths of those orbs, a hint of something else could be seen, as if it were something hidden so deeply that it was only available to the one who would be truly that close to the younger male. There were many times since their first encounter that Miharu wanted nothing more than to voice his internal questions, to ask what made Yoite cry out from his sleep, what made him so numb to want to hide his every emotion, why did he flinch at every friendly interaction?

He had begun to find it more and more difficult to silence his voice, and yet...he knew if he didn't keep it hidden that there was a large and unwelcoming chance that the thin thread that barely held them together would snap and the bond would be lost forever.

Those deep sapphires seemed more distant than normal, if that were even possible. They remained in his lap with his gloved hands and hat, unmoving, uninterested in the world around him until a smaller hand reached to settle upon his knee as if to wake him from his momentary daze. Only then did he speak.

"Where is Yukimi and the others?" The voice was soft, quiet, as it always was. A nearly silent chime riding the wind.

Miharu shook his head to the question. "They went out. They've been gone for a while now. You've been asleep for almost two hours."

Again, there was silence. However, this time, those blue eyes barely lifted to rest momentarily on Miharu's hand that was upon his leg, then to slowly travel upward along his arm, to his chest, shoulder, neck, until his gaze finally met Miharu's. There was something so strange and foreign in the sight in front of the younger male's eyes, that it startled him abruptly for the first time. The expression upon Yoite's face was...unexpected, yet, beautiful. A glistening shine was within the normally lifeless gaze, and Miharu realized only now that his cheeks held a hint of color for the first time since he could recall. If he didn't know any better, he'd say that the kira user was blushing...but that couldn't possibly be the case now, could it?

"Yoite?" Miharu questions out loud, and before he realized what he'd done, the thing that he'd fought so hard over the past several weeks to hold back spilled forth like a raging wildfire that threatened everything he held dear and relied on. "The other night when you cried out...what did you dream about?"

Miharu felt his heart drop in the pit of his stomach to the reaction he'd known from the very beginning would be waiting for him as response to the question. Yoite almost immediately leaned away, every muscle tense now and eyes dropping instantly as his brows furrowed ever so slightly. That striking glimmer in his sapphire orbs died out within a matter of seconds.

What had he done? A question so simple to him could have torn the final threads of Yoite's heart apart.

"Yoite...Um..."

Silence.

Yoite was still as a statue from where he sat, and at first glance, he almost appeared not to be breathing at all.

"Yoite?" he urged again in a small voice, his own brows knitting together with worry before boldly reaching up to touch his friend's cheek, finding that it was surprisingly warm against his palm, and he gasped lightly when that palm was leaned into.

Those long lashes fluttered shut and tickled the boy's hand lightly, and it was Miharu who tensed now, almost frightened of the sudden change in his companion. It rendered him not only speechless, but uncertain of what to do or how to react as well. Just as he was about to speak again, he felt it. Warm salty liquid caressed his skin which only startled him further, and before he could stop even himself, he draw his arms about Yoite's thin frame to pull him close until the other's ear rested against his chest. His heart.

Yoite made no move to retreat nor did he hold him in turn...he simply stayed in the embrace, allowing the silent tears to flutter down his face that he tried so often to hide.

Biting his lip, Miharu inwardly grimaced at himself. He knew that the questions, however simple they seemed, could only hurt the boy in his arms, and yet he still put his guard down long enough for his rebelling mouth to form the words. He'd hurt him, and it killed him inside to know it...

"Shh...I'm sorry, I'm sort for asking." He murmured in an almost lover's manner against the dark hair while keeping him pressed close and safe. Miharu's pulse thundered dangerously in his chest as he waited for something, anything to happen. To be pushed away, embraced, scolded, anything...

After what felt like hours, a shaky hand lifted to barely touch his arm as its' owner slowly leaned away enough to glance up at him with visible fright in his eyes and quivering lips that were mere inches from his own.

Miharu returned the expression, unconsciously frowning as thoughts tolled about and clashed inside of his warzone of a mind. Shaking his head slowly, he began to listen to the questions that plagued him.

'What is this...? I don't get it anymore...'

Yoite's eyes remained trapped with his, never swaying, never turning away. He wanted so badly to speak...but the words couldn't come out.

'What are we...? Not once have I felt afraid with you, though you once threatened me...I felt the same as you, not wanting unwelcomed emotion...but now I want to know more about you. Yoite, I want to know what you're feeling...what you're thinking...'

Miharu lifted quivering digits to pause just centimeters away from those gentle lips painted so sweetly with a rosy hue, his thin fingers brushing ghostly light over that seemingly welcoming mouth.

'We weren't supposed to be friends. I don't even know if we are...but I know I don't want to lose you. I can't lose you. I'd break...'

Miharu's breathing caught.

'I think you feel the same way.'

The distance closed in a matter of seconds that felt like ages...heads tilted, eager lips met soft frightened ones in a questing act, and the hand that had fallen short of touching his lips now moved to weave longingly into his hair to hold him to the kiss, silently speaking what his words could not.

Unstable sighs mirrored as eyes fell shut.

'Yoite..." The young boy's heart did flips where it lay nestled in his chest.

"Yoite..." Miharu whispered out loud in reflection to his thoughts, and as he did, a surprising sound caught his attention...a gentle mewl of approval, something so amazing he'd never thought could escape from Yoite's lips, and he was blessed to be the one to hear it. Grateful.

"Don't leave..." He continued to voice his thoughts now, every whisper causing their lips to brush together more than the previous word, causing more of the sweet little sound to escape the kira user without defense.

Uncertain fingers pushed their way slightly past the collar of Miharu's shirt, seeking out the warmth there needily to rest over his heart, though the gloves his hands had become so familiar with stopped him from finding what he sought, and Miharu knew it. Taking just a moment longer to revel in the way Yoite's lips felt on his own, he then leaned slowly away to take the wandering hand with his own and cautiously slipped the tan glove from the slender fingers. Those fingers that appeared to be covered with a dusty shade, though he knew the truth behind such an appearance.

Miharu's gaze lifted just enough to watch the other's face. It seemed as though the older of the two was still in a dazed state, surrendering for only a moment, but a moment long enough to give Miharu the chance to see deeper than the normal shell.

The shy digits pressed back against Miharu's collarbone beneath his shirt, and slid still lower to be snug against the beating heart that awaited there. Smiling gently at the action, Miharu leaned forward once more to place an affectionate kiss to Yoite's brow.

'Such a beautiful face...' he thought silently whilst looking upon the other closely. Rare was out of the question now. This was new, all new and all appreciated. His lips tingled where the other's had met just a moment before, and as much as he craved another feel of them, he refused to push it.

Lifting his hand, he cupped Yoite's to his heart with a calm expression. The tears seemed to have come to an end which he was grateful for, yet he still felt a twinge of guilt at the knowledge of why they were shed in the first place.

Blue orbs opened again with something unreadable present there.

What was it?

Miharu was sure he could see fear...but what else? There was something there, which was obvious. That much he was certain of.

Uncertainty...

Fright?

What else?

It was present in the way that Yoite submitted to his emotions long enough to allow those eyes to fall back to Miharu's lips with...

Want, no...need? Perhaps.

It was present also in the way his lower lip quivered and how his hand pressed more firmly to the spot it rested against without realizing such an action even came from himself. So many things were swimming in those sapphire depths: the deepest lengths of the sea with every creature imaginable feuding for dominance over feeling.

Such a delicate creature before him...This beauty held such fierce powers that could tear an individual apart from the inside-Miharu had witnessed it first hand. However, this person he now gazed upon almost seemed entirely different.

'Even if I'm the one who hurt you...let me be the one to comfort you.'

It was a plea, unheard, unvoiced, but a plea nonetheless. Would he hate him, he wondered, if he spoke his mind all the time? The curiosity was pointless he knew, since he would never do so. He was apathetic, indifferent by nature...at least, on the outside. He didn't need to say anything. He never was a vocal person, and at that moment, he knew that Yoite could feel what was thrumming so vividly against his palm, that talking wasn't important.

'I'm always going to be right here...' he thought with a smile, realizing that Yoite's eyes had slipped shut. Whether or not he was beginning to doze, he didn't know. Leaning closer to bury his face into the crook of Yoite's neck, Miharu too closed his eyes with a smile, not once allowing his arms to stray far from the other.

There was nothing in the world more important then what he felt beating so wildly in his chest at that moment. This was one of the memories he would keep close.

A moment only they could know.


	2. Chapter 2

The morning following had been warm. The sun was glinting happily down upon the two slumbering teenagers who were so comfortably curled against one another. At least, that's what t would seem to any outside observers. Though Miharu had indeed been in a deep sleep, a pair of deep blue eyes remained open to gaze thoughtfully at the sleeping boy on the shoulder of their owner. Yoite's expression was not cold, but not soft. He had indeed fallen asleep previously, but it wasn't long before he found himself completely awake and unable to move due to the slight weight keeping him to his spot. It was rare for him to find a full night's sleep anyway. Then again, it wasn't as though he were in a hurry to move.

As he watched with unreadable eyes, he notices that some time in the middle of the night one of his own arms had managed to find its' way around those small shoulders as if he had subconsciously been attempting to hold onto him as close as possible.

It was strange╔Hours before, he had thought of nothing but retrieving Engetsurin. For the past week, the unwelcoming sensations, or rather, lack of sensations had begun making him nervous and even irritable, and he knew that there was no way that fact escaped those around him. No matter how many times he tried to convince himself that he didn't care about anyone or anything, he still had to question himself on occasion. What he was doing was for himself, wasn't it? It was by accident that he had grown so attached to having Miharu around so often. In the beginning, he meant to use the boy as a tool to fulfill his own wish╔but as time passed, that boy's name grew so familiar, and those glassy, yet stunning eyes that peered so deep inside of his soul made him realize that this was no tool. This was a boy. A boy who had just as many misfortunes forced unwillingly upon that small frame as Yoite had.

They were the same, and it frightened him to see it.

As he remained still, peering now tenderly down at Miharu, he found his mind wandering to the night before. He had been scolded by Yukimi just hours previous to then for trying to journey out into the night on his own in search of Engetsurin while he'd had a fever. He recalled being sat down and curling into the blanket that was placed about his shoulders, and apparently sometime after he'd fallen asleep.

It wasn't surprising to him that he didn't remember dozing off. Recently, even though he could rarely find a full night's sleep, his body was far too exhausted to stay physically or mentally conscious for an entire day. The thing that confused him was that when he had woken once more, he'd looked up to find not the fatherly blue eyes of Yukimi, but the gentle green eyes of his young friend peering down at him instead of the ceiling.

What happened after that?

A blush immediately crept upon Yoite's face when he thought of the events that had taken place. A hand lifted to brush ghostly light over Miharu's lips, shuddering faintly to the

feeling of them on the tops of his bare fingers. The memory of the way those lips moved against his own, making him feel so many things he thought he would never know.

The truth was╔he was no longer seeking the Shinrabanshou's power for himself. No, not anymore. Now the most important thing was seeking his wish as fast as possible before breaking his promise to Miharu. He would not allow himself to die before Miharu could use the power to erase him. There had been too many occurrences in his past and too many disappointed faces to add another, especially this one, to the list.

Calm blue eyes strayed from those addicting lips to travel down to the boy's shirt, which had somehow shifted higher. It wasn't long before he understood the reason. His own palm was pressed flat over a softly beating heart. His senses were indeed failing, but Miharu had somehow managed to come up with the magical solution to what would set every nerve ablaze.

The boy stirred beside him, and for the faintest of moments, Yoite allowed that dreaded thought to cross his mind. Would this boy still be so caring if he knew? If he saw just how disgusting and filthy he was.

"Yoite?" Miharu asked in a sleepy tone, causing shivers to run down his spine.

Sitting up slowly, Miharu stretched his arms out in front of him, much resembling the way a kitten would when first waking. Glancing down at Yoite, he tilted his head a bit as if questioning the other's expression, which of course simply lead to the sixteen-year-old ooking the other way.

"Have you been awake long?" He asked in a tired tone as he tried against to get the other to speak, putting two and two together at the way Yoite avoided his eye contact and yet was unable to hide the rosy hue to his cheeks. It made it difficult for him to refrain from laughing or smiling. The sight was comforting to say the least. It was proof that Yoite was alive.

"Not very long." Clearly a lie, but one Miharu didn't mind brushing aside.

Nodding softly he rose to his feet. A hand absently brushed through his unruly hair (though it did little to help the mess) before offering a hand for the other who was still too caught up in a daze to accept it and got up by himself. Smiling faintly, the younger teen turned to make his way over to the kitchen cupboards. He rummaged around for a few minutes in search of something, which he seemed to have eventually found though Yoite was unable to see what it was as he was still too busy pretending to be invisible to pay close enough attention. Within a matter of seconds, the older male's coat was pulled more firmly around himself, perhaps to make himself feel less vulnerable though one couldn't tell. Miharu took no offense. He wasn't truly expecting much to change, as long as Yoite was well aware that he was always going to be there and there was nothing in the world, Nabari or the next, that could change that. He was fine with that.

Sipping softly on a juicebox he'd snapped from Yukimi's food stash, Miharu continued to prepare something on the counter and stove for several quiet minutes as he pondered to himself. Something was wrong, he silently concluded with himself. It was difficult to remain happy when he held such a feeling of unraveling dread. It was like something was going to happen.

Something did feel off, he realized when he heard the hint of shuffling from the main room where Yoite had waited. Green eyes shifted upward to stare into the reflection of the pans that hung above. He noticed the way that Yoite seemed to have struggled to pull on his gloves, fingers fumbling clumsily as if every nerve had decided to rebel. There was a strange darkness to his hands too, moreso than usual. Did he somehow hurt him last night? It made his heart pound dangerously at the thought, wondering if harm had somehow befallen the other. Perhaps the swelling emotion of the night had caused too much of a strain on the other boy.

Sighing to himself, Miharu averted his eyes back to the task at hand regardless the way his pulse raced. It was ridiculous how badly his hands were shaking while he made the attempt to prepare their breakfast.

Turning the burner on low, he moved to where Yoite was standing facing away from him and gazed at his back in thought. Funny how he never realized it before. Yoite was thinner than he appeared, and that was hard to do. He looked fragile.

His next action felt so natural, so strangely familiar that he didn't have time to think it through. Stepping forward, long arms wrapped around Yoite's waist to reach forward, hands placing over his securely in order to assist in sliding the gloves smoothly over the long digits. The action seemed to have startled the other at first, but he made no try to move away. His blue eyes lowered to those working fingers. They seemed to move skillfully, freely, and it made Yoite feel surprised by their warmth, but just like that, they were gone far too soon as Miharu took a step back, turned sharply on his heel and sauntered back to the kitchen.

Little did he know, that little devil wore a smug smirk on his normally emotionless face.

Why was it that those fingers were all he was able to feel now, he wondered. It was the most odd, yet exhilarating knowledge he'd ever come across, and it confused him bitterly at the same time.

Nothing held the young shinobi to him, so what was it that kept him so close? Only to this young boy sis Yoite place all of the trust in the world╔and for the first time in his life, it wasn't in vain. What was he supposed to do now? Were things suppose to change? No, things already had. Everything had changed, but not in the way one would think. It had nothing to do with spent nights or caressing lips. Everything shifted when that thread was sewn into the first glance shared between the two in Fuuma village.

However many minutes passed during his pondering, he wasn't sure. It was only when he noticed the shadow peering over him from where he now sat huddled on the sofa that the boy looked up to see Miharu in front of him with two bowls of something steaming and warm in his hands.

"I thought you might be hungry." Miharu spoke softly as he set one of the bowls down beside Yoite, holding the other close to his chest as he took a seat beside him and began nibbling on his portion.

For minutes Yoite said nothing until he silently brought his own bowl close to his face and inhaled deeply, seeming unusually quiet, even for himself. Lowering his head more, if possible, he pulled the bowl closer to his chest before whispering almost inaudibly. "What is it?"

'So that's why' Miharu thought pitifully while watching him before answering.

"Okayu. Eat some, its' warm."

In all of the time he'd spent observing the kira user, it wasn't long before he'd recognized everything the sixteen-year-old would do as being 'normal' for him. His senses were failing. His taste buds had failed him long ago and were less than useful. If he had something to blurry to see, he would try to recognize it by scent. If that was too difficult, he had no other choice but to ask, which clearly bothered him when he had to do so. It seemed one of the few things Yoite was able to register anymore was the difference between hot and cold.

Sighing faintly to himself, Miharu pulled a newspaper he'd seen draped across the nearby cabinet over and onto his lap in order to be able to place his food upon it without burning himself and began to eat in silence, simply basking in the warmth he felt in the other's company. Just the two of them. It was peaceful this way, and for just a moment it gave him enough time to forget about what they had to do and gave him time to just be there and relax.

Time passed without a spoken word as both ate. Of course Yoite had finished first, but Miharu took his time to enjoy, knowing that the other could not. Perhaps he savored every bite as if he was tasting for them both.

Not once since waking had the gentle flush on the other's cheeks diminished, but of course neither spoke on the matter. There was no need to. They both knew that it had happened, and it had inevitably altered something between them, but certainly not for the worst.

Eventually settling the dishes between them when emptied, Miharu took up the newspaper as if pretending to pass the time, when in reality, he was simply distracting himself. Only when he heard a click of a door did he glance up to see a blond head come into view.

Miharu lowered the newspaper a bit, blinking in question. "Yukimi-san, are you going somewhere?" he inquired, noting the bag hitched over the man's shoulder.

Yukimi paused in his step with an unreadable expression on his face. "Hmm? Yeah. You guys go with Raikou and Gau today, okay?"

Blinking, Miharu nodded, though Yoite made no move or acknowledgment of a response as the gunner approached the two of them. Reaching into his pocket for something, the blond held up a matching set before them of something Mharu couldn't quite make out until it was right in front of his eyes. He never was one for phones.

Sinking..

"So, these are presents from me." Yukimi spoke matter-of-factly.

That sinking feeling fluttered in his chest once more, though he knew not why.

"What are these again?"

"They're called call phones, and they are a popular means of communication outside of the palace, your majesty." Yukimi's tone caused him to force down a flinch. Majesty╔did people really assume Miharu had wanted this power thrust upon him? Maybe if he didn't have it within him, he wouldn't have to deal with the burden of erasing the one he...

"Oh." He replied simply.

"Make sure they're turned on all the time so we can reach each other." Narrowing lighter blue eyes turned to Yoite then. "Got it?"

Even when Yoite made no sound, something seemed to have caused a sudden uncomfortable air about him, and though Yukimi didn't notice one bit it made Miharu wonder silently how much of this his companion was actively able to hear. Side glancing at him, he thought quickly before turning back to Yukimi, biting his lower lip softly as he exclaimed.

"Just don't trace our positions with the GPS system and track out every move,

okay? It's a breach of privacy..."

Bingo.

Yukimi paused briefly with a dumbfounded expression before sighing and lifting a questioning brow at him. "If you don't know what a cell phone is, why do you know so much about it?"

_Snap._

Miharu turned when he heard the sound, finding it nearly impossible to stifle a laugh or even minuscule smile when he'd spotted Yoite's shocked, though strangely adorable expression as he held there in his hands, the present he'd just received from Yukimi, now present in two pieces rather than one. It was almost enough to distract him too much to register that the doorbell had chimed. Well, almost.

There it was for the third time that morning, now more than ever. The feeling. Something was going to go wrong. Something was terribly off. Something was╔

The voice in his mind stopped short as Yukimi pulled the door open to reveal Ichiki, standing with a smug expression across her wicked face. The unfriendly sensation he'd gotten that morning was now at full effect, causing chills to run up his very spine the moment the three of them had approached the doorway in question of why she was even there.

The first time Miharu had journeyed to be accepted into the Kairoushou, the majority of them seemed welcoming enough. Yukimi, of course, was Yukimi. Raikou didn't taking much warming up to at all, though Gau was a tad more difficult. Kazuho ever so warm╔but then there was this woman. It was clear from the beginning that she and Hattori were secretive amongst themselves, but at that time it didn't matter to him. At that time he was only interested in helping Yoite, that he didn't give it much thought. Now he found the gut feeling of liquid ice being poured into his very core.

"I've come to pick up Rokujou-kun." She spoke with a smile. Miharu's heart thundered with her words.

One.

"What's this about?" Miharu began the inquiry, "I was just getting ready to

leave."

"There is no need."

Two.

"You were supposed to be protected from the beginning."

Three.

His heart was warning him that something was going to go wrong, yet he still couldn't' seem to grasp just what that was. It was making him uneasy and irritable.

"I'm sorry you've been thrown around because of our circumstances in Nabari."

Four.

"So you can get even a little closer back to your normal life, we're preparing a place to live, as well as finding a school."

Five.

"Yoite," she finally hit it, "You go and look for Mr. Kumohira."

There it was.

Miharu stepped forward between them. The warmth he felt from the taller male behind him, that warmth he felt trying to slip away was causing him to shiver now.

"But Yoite's not feeling well." He made the attempt to reason, only to be cut off by the woman before him once more, her stern voice seeming to slice a hole right through his middle to shatter the ice that was already causing increasing discomfort.

"It's the leader's order." Her voice was cold, black as her hair and as those thin fingers reached forward to wrap around Miharu's slim wrist like several latching spider legs, he allowed his eyes to trail back to see Yoite seeming lost himself, his eyes visible just barely beneath the shadow of his hat.

"Let's go. The car is waiting for us downstairs. Yukimi-san..." The black widow turned her head back in the direction of the gunner as he stopped her before they were complete gone.

There was concern present in the man's eyes, a fatherly type concern, and even though it was genuine, Miharu found his lack of interest in it at the moment. The only thing he could see behind his bleary eyes, were those mirroring his own beneath that tanned hat. In that time knowing him, never before had Miharu witnessed those blue orbs seeming so frightened and astray, a dying flame made up of sapphires that tried to reach for his own emerald ones, only for the lifeline to be snapped.

Miharu felt everything try to give in now╔that broken expression was too much to handle.

Yoite didn't have much time left, and as the harsh grip of reality pulled at him, dragged him to the car, he realized it now more than ever.

* * *

With every step taken, the echo would ring painfully loud in Miharu's ear, though he made no flinch, no action to even illustrate that he was breathing aside from the steady steps he took toward that room where he was certain the leader was awaiting his arrival. It was an uncomfortable feeling fueled by the Ichiki woman walking so closely after him, close enough that he could almost feel the chill of death grip him from behind.

He couldn't get over the last thing he'd registered. That look in those eyes of Yoite's, one that he'd only seen once or twice but one that often went away far too quickly to make sense of what it was. Something bothered him though╔this time, that expression hadn't gone away. The owner of those eyes began to trail after him, acting as a lost puppy, only to be stopped in the process by none other than Yukimi. Why? He knew that Yoite's time was running short, and it scared him. What would he do, he wondered, if he were to go back and Yoite wasn't there?

"Rokujou-kun," That cold voice bit into his dazed thinking, and he looked up to realize that in the journey from the car to the building, she had stepped in front and was currently awaiting him to enter the room before him. "It's best not to keep him waiting for much longer."

Sighing faintly to himself, Miharu stepped past her, not caring whether or not she followed him in.

It wasn't a large room, though at the same time it gave the air that it was. Perhaps it was the continuous sinking he felt in his gut, or the furious pounding of his heart in his chest that was gradually making him feel ill.

Settled down at the opposite end of the table toward the other side of the room was Hattori, none other than the seemingly intelligent, though obviously sly leader of the Kairoushou whom he had become all too familiar with.

"I'm glad to see you healthy, Rokujou-kun." That tone was almost as icy as Ichiki's had been, but it seemed that this man had a more fool-proof way of hiding this fact. Either way, it made Miharu uneasy thought he not once showed this. "Come sit down." The elder male gave a friendly smile as he motioned for the boy to sit before him. Not even bothering to hesitate, Miharu tucked his legs up under himself as he took a seat on the zafu opposite Hattori as those words continued. "I'm sure you've already been told, but we have made arrangements for you to live nearby so as tokeep close watch over you."

"I have." An short response, but Miharu knew there was no point in trying to make conversation with the man. He was there for a reason, and regardless his responses, he was certain he was going to be told.

"We've been informed that you've been doing a bit of acting on your own, Rokujou-kun. We can't have you putting yourself in danger."

Miharu remained silent while listening. Inside of his mind, emotions were feuding, confusing him and making his head spin. He merely blinked as Hattori began setting out cards before them, and Miharu immediately picked up on the hint. Reaching forward once all the cards were present, Miharu flipped over a card. Three of spades. Taking another card, he set it back along with the first.

"Yoite was taught better than that. With how important the Shinrabansho is to him, I'm surprised he continuously put you in so much danger." A strong hand extended from beneath the large sleeves of the kimono to take a card, then another, smiling softly at the match and set them to his right. Reaching for another try, Hattori continued. "Yukimi gave him that name, you know."

What was he getting at? Miharu wondered, keeping his gaze low as Hattori nodded for his turn.

"Is that so..." he murmured while making his move.

"We're expecting Yukimi and the others to successfully gain the Engetsurin. Let's handle the situation carefully so we can get you back to the front world even one minute faster. The world of Nabari is not a place for frail children like you to stay long."

Each word spoken cause Miharu to inwardly cringe all the more, but still he refused to lift his head. Something was surely off, and he was curious as to what it was. Since first joining the Kairoushou, Miharu had only thought of his own reasons behind trying to gain full control over this hidden power deep within him. He made a promise to someone important to him, and he was completely willing to carry it out, regardless the outcome. However, this person in front of him, the one smiling so smugly now was finally making him ponder every outcome aside from his own.

"Hattori-san," Miharu began softly, but curiously. "What are you planning to use the hijitsu for?"

"Me?" Well well, it appeared that the question caught Hattori off guard. Barely a moment had passed. "World domination."

"Okey dokey.

"No, I'm joking. Don't take it in stride." For the first time since entering that frightful room, those now thoughtful and intent green eyes made their bold journey to take a close look at the man's face. The words continued.

"The resetting of history." Those terrible golden brown eyes shone with such passion that it was startling, knowing that there was a soul capable of finding such joy in such a menacing theory. "I've lived in multiracial places, had real-life experiences, and seen harsh reality in it so much it hurt. People who at first glance seem friendly but are only pretending, people who have minor quarrels while carrying the weight of the past on their shoulders and despising each other."

But surely that isn't all that's in the world? Miharu couldn't understand it fully. In the past, he tried his hardest to set emotions aside, an act that proved more and more tricky with the passing days. Pain was a large part of life, but along with it was so much more...

He had a feeling the other percent wasn't on Hattori's mind.

"The world, society is perpetually bound by the errs of the past. You could even say it has become a habit. If you think of it that way, the world will never have peace."

Miharu's brows twitched just slightly as he fought a frown.

"I just want to throw out a single stone from the shadows...that is all. For people to take a step forward, the Shinrabanshou is necessary." Such chilling words, the boy nearly had to fight a flinch when that menacing arm extended as if reaching for him, but settled on a card. "When the world is free of the shackles that bind it, how will people begin to live? This is going to be the first cautious experiment."

Miharu turned his gaze away once more, feeling suddenly rather uneasy. No matter how hard you fight to hide your sentiment, humans aren't humans without it. Emotions, passion, things like that╔they are what make a person alive. The familiar smile of Raimei and Kouchi, the concern shown in Thobari's eyes, these were things that made them who they are. An emotionless shell is no human...

Even Yoite, who tried so hard to deny his very existence could never truly do so. Miharu had seen his tears, his loneliness that reflected so strongly from his soul through his eyes.

"What do you think, Rokujou-kun?"

The question threw him off slightly, but he answered in a way he figured the other would be pleased to hear.

"I think that's fine. Please do your best..." Sure enough, those cruel yet knowledgeable eyes lightened even more.

"Why thank you." He laughed heartily, "We'll work hard so you won't be burdened." A pause, "So-" This pause was making the young shinobi feel more and more uncomfortable. "I'm going to bring this up because it has to do with that as well. You have no need to grant Yoite's desire."

Miharu's head snapped up, a wide-eyed expression on his face.

"Don't you think the erasing of a being is meaningless as well?" The words were gradually threatening to cut into him, deeper and deeper, backing him into an invisible wall. There was nothing in the world that would stop him from fulfilling his promise to his friend.

"Why...?" he asked in a soft voice, only to be cut off.

"I was the one who found him. I know the gist of things. Even 'why he wants to disappear'. By putting himself into the shadow of the world of Nabari, Kairoushou, he disappeared from the 'front' world and with the extreme situation of gaining the kira being 'death', he instead tried to get closer to the possibility of 'disappearing'. But Yoite was supposed to die if the Shinrabanshou did not activate after he gained the kira."

'Yoite...' the boy's small fingers clenched where they rested in his lap, feeling every word of Hattori's causing it to become harder and harder to keep his irritation back. Miharu's eyes were frozen to the spot where, had Hattori still been sitting, would be staring straight into his eyes. It was true that Miharu held no knowledge of the reason behind Yoite's wish. That scar on his neck that he tried so desperately to hide...Previously, Miharu had seen it upon Yoite waking from yet another nightmare, and just that fact drove the kira user to tears. The name 'Sora' fluttered into Miharu's mind, but he could not completely make out the meaning of it. Was Sora someone of Yoite's past? Or perhaps...

"If using the Shinrabanshou can produce complete disappearance, it is natural for that child to await it."

That menacing figure now towered over him, casting a shadow down upon him which made him feel even smaller than he was as one of those hands extended to him, patting him lightly on the head as if he were some household pet. "Yoite is looking at the Shinrabanshou╔he is looking at you for his last wish."

Without thinking, Miharu reached up to push the hand from him, relieved when it left easily, though the bitter words continued to bite and grip at him.

"But I can't let you grant that wish. We want to safely extract the hijitsu from you. That's also for your own sake. Do you understand?"

'My own sake...?'

"But Yoite and I..."

"Yoite will die." It was snapping. His ability to keep quiet as a mouse in times of need was dying out, and as that frightful beast before him leaned closer, a gaze in his eyes as if Miharu were to be his next meal, he could feel his heart threaten to snap as well. "But be relieved." A thumb pressed firmly to his throat, and he thought his neck would snap with the way he had to tilt his head back to peer up at the man so uncomfortably close to him, speaking such painful words so easily. "When the hijitsu is transferred to me, and if the boy is still alive, I will grant his wish for you. I won't let you use it until we lose the risk of failure."

'How dare you?' Miharu's mind screamed, but he was too paralyzed to move. He wasn't some object to be used, and Yoite certainly wasn't meant to just be tossed aside and forgotten about. Then again╔wouldn't that be the outcome if he were to grant his desire? The realization hit him hard, and it was enough to make him tremble in his spot.

"Do you understand? That boy is destined to die."

A loud snap of a door, a sound so unexpected that it was enough to make Miharu fight a startled gasp, yet at the same time it was as wonderful as the chime of a victory bell trying to pull him to the surface of an endless pool of shadow. That pool was his mind.

His eyes widened more when he turned to the direction of the sound, and his heart pounded more furiously behind his ribcage.

"Yoite..." he gasped out, unaware of how badly he was shaking still. He only shook harder as Yoite approached him, and yet the wave of relief that had so pleasantly washed over him was shattered to the return of Hattori's voice, reminding him that he was still in grave danger, whether it be physical or emotional.

"Why are you here?" The man asked bitterly, eying Yoite as if he were an insect meant to be squashed.

Yoite's eyes were barely hidden beneath his hat, but it was enough to show the determination in their depths. "I'm staying with Miharu." Such charming words.

His gaze lowered to meet Miharu's now, that warm hand hidden beneath tanned gloved reached out for him. "Let's go, Miharu..."

He braced Miharu for a moment to help him to his feet. As much as Miharu tried to tell himself that it wasn't fear or distress that made it difficult to stand, he was brought down again when that cold tone spoke up once more, causing him to give a look of distaste in the direction.

"We were just talking about you." Hattori spoke with a pleased smile over his harsh features. "Give up. I understand how you feel, but-"

"Stop." Yoite tried, and for just a split second Miharu thought Hattori would be pleasant enough to do so. What a fool he was...

"Are you reading lips to cover for your lack of hearing?"

'What...?' Miharu's eyes snapped to Yoite's, but those blue eyes were too busy peering sourly at the elder man that caused so much pain without any care for other's feelings. He had already stated it. He was striving for a world of people who lack passion and emotion. Supposedly, that shadow world he craved was meant for the best...but there was no way that someone like this would possibly give anything back but more pain.

The boy's foresty eyes remained glued to where they peered at Yoite, concern written over his every feature for one of the rare moments of his life. Was he truly that foolish to not realize it before? He knew Yoite's body was failing him, but how could he not see that things were already this far along...?

"You really are diligent and smart╔as well as beautiful. You know that forcing Rokujou-kun to do the impossible will not help either of you. Because you are a kind child..."

Yoite took a step forward, a slight but noticeable stumble to his step. "You-You're wrong..." His fingers clenched tightly at his side, a visible tremble to his every action.

"To wish for the happiness of another before yourself...you sorrowful child."

Every word seemed to break something within Miharu's companion, and he felt helpless to stop it. Helpless...always helpless with him. Why could he never do anything to keep him happy? That's all he wanted...

"You gained the kira. No one could predict that a few months later the Shinrabanshou would be activated. Not Rokujou-kun, not you, or even me."

'Stop it...'

Yoite shook harder. Miharu took a step forward to brace him, one arm resting on his lower back gently with the other touching his arm reassuringly as if to tell him not to listen. "Please, stop it..." he pleaded in a small voice, wanting so badly to shut the man up.

"Yoite, that's a thing called destiny."

He wouldn't stop...it wouldn't stop.

Yoite's arm lifted to partially cover his face as if he were trying to hide. 'Please...' he begged inside of his mind. The view around him was becoming blurry.

Miharu had faded from what was left of his view, as had Hattori. He was alone there in the dark and unwelcoming realm of his heart, unable to shut the words out, unable to do anything but become that frightened child once more, huddled in a corner as everything around him came crashing down. 'Please...' he whispered again silently, 'Don't say it...'

"When the hijitsu is in my hands, I'll make a world where sorrowful children like you were never born."

'I'll fall apart...'

"So please, have peace of mind..."

'I'm breaking╔.but I can only..."

"Good night."

'Miharu.' That's right...Miharu was right beside him. He wasn't alone, he wasn't the frightened child anymore. He lifted his head to realize that tears were falling relentlessly from his eyes to spill out across the ground, but he didn't care anymore.

"I can only rely on Miharu." He spoke the words boldly, though whether or not they were to himself or out loud, he couldn't tell. Before he knew it, his hand was lifted, that dangerous finger of his pointed directly toward the man's head. It spilled forward, that harsh power of his, the power that was his very soul, the only thing left that was strong and sturdy. Another piece torn away, deep heat bursting forward from him as he directed it forth, hitting not the man, but the wall beside his head. His tears were blurring his vision and he was shaking too hard now.

Miharu gasped at the blast, immediately tightening his grip on Yoite's arms, trying to pull him back and against him though Yoite raised his hand again with a menacing step forward to nearly make contact with Hattori's very skull. The action rendered the man shocked.

"Hand over all of the kinjutsushos." Miharu was just as surprised by the sixteen- year-old's order as Hattori had been. It was silent. The three of them were there, two towering over one now, only the faint breathing of them could be heard as well as the faint hints of fought tears on Yoite's part as he tried his best to hide his face with the bill of his hat. Finally the man in front of them decided to make a sound. A soft chuckle╔how dare he?

" It looks like you've chosen the wrong opportunity. If we had only collected all the kinjutsushos, I'm sure our situation would be different. "

No more.

Miharu spoke up for the first time in a long while, his hands falling back to his sides as his expressionless demeanor returned. "Please hand over the kinjutsushos."

"You'll even throw away peace to stay at Yoite's side╔staying with me is for your benefit too, you know."

_"Please, hand them over."_ Miharu repeated with agitation in his voice. "Please hand them over." This time it was a demand with warning in his eyes. This beast had threatened too much, broken too much. It was his fault. He was the reason Yoite's body was broken, and the reason Yoite's tears were staining his face. He wouldn't allow anymore, ever again.

There was yet another moment of silence before Hattori spoke with a shake of the head. "I wonder where the source of your bond is...Too bad."

That feeling of dread rolled over him like a stampede of wild horses bolting from something awful and horrific╔That small yet conniving sound a wolf wouldmake just before striking for its' prey. Had Miharu predicted what was to happen next, he never would have allowed Ichiki to take him to this place so easily.

Without so much as a break in the air, a blur before them caused them to jump back in surprise as two shinobi clad in red and white garbs burst into the room with not so much as a warning, aiming directly for them. Miharu's heart jumped as they made yet another swipe, a shiver of an unwelcoming feeling fluttering through him at the cold expression on the female shinobi's face as her auburn hair swept about her face like a frame. The expression was almost a mirror of the one Hattori had just seconds before...

Pushing Miharu behind him, Yoite stumbled back, and that's when Miharu noticed it. The sharp, long but thin senbon held easily between the harsh fingers of one assailant which dared to aim for his already unsteady companion. Miharu was never one for fighting, nor did he care to ever get involved with it, so he did the only thing he could at the time and wrapped his arms tightly around that hand that threatened Yoite. Without so much as a breath, the kasa member swept around to implant their knee directly with Miharu's face, which he barely was able to block part of with his arms, and he was certain he could barely make out a sickening crack as red clouded his eyes. His eyes were closed tightly as the noise around him became louder, crashes and movement, and the next thing he knew was that Yoite was right beside him now, reaching for his hand.

"Miharu!" His hand was taken by the bigger one as Yoite turned quickly to glance back at their attackers, directing a blast of ki and barely missing.

Regardless the failure of hitting target, this did give them enough time to flee out the door without so much as looking back.

Yoite's hand tightened on Miharu's, and Miharu's squeezed his reassuringly as they looked ahead of them together, each knowing they would never be able to go back.

'We just made enemies with the leader of Kairoushou.'

Miharu gasped softly for breath. Never before had he run so hard. 'What do we do?'

The pattering of their footsteps echoed through his ears. For the first time in his life, he felt it-the harsh freezing grip of fear strangling him, sucking the air right from his very lungs. He didn't notice the brush beneath him digging into and cutting at his heal which was clad only by the socks on his feet. He didn't notice either how chilly it was outside. He was scared for Yoite, knowing well that the Kairoushou would never risk harming the holder of the Shinrabanshou, but surely they wouldn't hesitate going after the kira wielder.

Pushing through branches that bit at their arms and faces, the two shoved on. Neither knew how long or how far they had run, nor did they know if they were even being followed. It wasn't the thought that someone could be following them...no, it was the realization that they had given the very group they were part of incentive to go after them, and there was a large possibility that they could be torn viciously apart once more, quite possibly for good.

* * *

Panting harshly for air, the rosy-haired samurai's brows furrowed deep in thought as he noticed the burst of smoke and rubble from up ahead, signaling that something had surely gone wrong. Biting his lip harshly, he shook his head and hurried forward toward the building where he'd heard a crash hand in hand with the curious smoke just moments before.

He knew he shouldn't have let Yoite go ahead without him, but he was also smart enough to know that when the teenager was determined and set enough, that there was no point in even attempting to stop him. Never before had he seen such a look present in the boy's eyes, and it had frozen him to his spot. There was truly something deep between Miharu and Yoite, something that no one, not even the great leader of the Kairoushou could unravel.

"Raikou-san!" A familiar voice chimed from behind him. The samurai turned, spotting Gau shortly behind him and slightly out of breath.

"Gau-"

"Raikou-san, I heard something was going on at the main house." Gau panted softly, looking up at the other through the mess of black curls strewn about his head. "Do you know what's going on?"

"I think I have an idea." Raikou spoke the words with agitation, throwing Gau off for only a moment before the young boy caught on.

"Where is Yoite-kun...?"

He read the samurai far too well.

* * *

The two trembling forms fell hard against the wall, which Miharu had come to realize were large sacks of something, though he was unable to make out what, nor did he care. It felt as though his lungs were trying to shrivel up and break off inside of him. They had been running for what felt like a decade, and finally they both felt that they could run no more and had found a place to momentarily call shelter, thankfully.

"Hn..." The disgruntled voice next to him caught his attention, and before he could be of any assistance, Yoite hunched over as several violent coughs wracked his entire frame. He tugged his hand harshly away from Miharu's, both of his gloved hands clasping firmly over his mouth as his body jerked with each cough until that horrific sight of liquid red came to stain what was once tan. His knees shook and he didn't have time to catch himself as he sank to the ground with his back against the sacks that braced them.

Miharu watched the sight pitifully. His own trembling fingers lifted to latch onto Yoite's jacket as he himself remained completely silent. It was enough, he tried to tell himself. It was enough that Yoite knew he was by his side.

The area around them was silent and cold, and at the same time comfortingly so. With every passing minute, it seemed that the older boy's breathing had calmed in the slightest and no longer was he coughing up crimson that was supposed to be inside of him. In these long seconds Miharu took the time to observe their surroundings, coming to the conclusion that it must have been an old storage area of some sort.

Finally, when Yoite's breathing was nearly silent again, he dared to speak up. "This place is very secluded...I wonder where we are?" he asked, not necessarily expecting to receive an answer so soon, if at all.

"Your feet..." Yoite's voice was softer than normal and in a way Miharu wondered whether or not he could even tell anymore. Hattori's words rang coldly inside of his mind.

_'Are you reading lips to cover for your lack of hearing?'_

He tried to push the thoughts away even though he was well aware that they must hold a large portion of truth behind them. After a minute, he gaze dropped to notice how soaked his socks were, and just then he felt how badly the cuts and possible bruises stung. After all, there was no way during the beginning of his meeting with Hattori that he could have possibly predicted what would happen. Why would he have time to grab shoes?

"Oh, Yeah." He hesitantly removed his grasp on the fabric in his hands to tug slightly on his right sock to register how useless it was now. "If we had a little money and a place to buy shoes...That aside, though, the muffler is..."

"Muffler?"

"The one Hanabusa made. It got all covered in blood at Alya." Miharu could see from the corner of his eyes that Yoite turned slightly away with a nearly unreadable expression on his face. The portion that was readable, however, shown pure guilt. After all, it was his blood that had nearly ruined Hana's gift. Miharu noticed this and instantly added, "Yukimi got it and took it to the cleaners. So it's back there."

Silence. Perhaps he shouldn't have said anything on the subject at all, or maybe Yoite had already forgotten and was thinking of the events that had just transpired. He really didn't know what to think anymore. The wind fluttered by with harsh intent, reminding Miharu of the time of the year. He shivered and drew his knees close to his chest as best he could, but it didn't help in the least. Closing his eyes, he thought back to what had happened between he, Yoite, and Hattori. The meeting began innocently enough, but now they had made enemies with one of the most vile men known to Nabari and the 'front' world. What were they to do? What could they do?

Another flurry of wind whipped past them and as it did, his companion made to stand up without speaking so much as a word.

"Yoite?" The moment the name was spoken Yoite stumbled and barely caught himself. "Where are you going?" Miharu tried again with concern thick within his voice. "Hey, it's dangerous Yoite, wait!"

"It's alright." Yoite finally turned to look over his shoulder at Miharu, who had the expression of a frightened puppy who had just been scolded. There was nothing he could do but to have faith in the other as he watched his friend journey without him, disappearing without another word into the distance. 'it's alright.' Miharu reminded himself, eyes turning glossy.

Why Yoite still found the need to be by himself so much confused him, but what could he do? There were still faint hints of drying tears present on the dying

boy's face, even as he left Miharu there alone shivering and waiting. But he came for him...he went out of his way to find Miharu once more, to take him back with that outstretched hand that was beginning to become recognizable fitting into his own, that Miharu couldn't help the brief flicker of joy that warmed him.

He let out a startled sound when something in his pocket began to vibrate and sing, and it took him a bit to register what it was as his heart tried to recover from the miniature heart attack.

'It's just the cell phone...' he thought gratefully while digging it out. 'Yukimi-san...'

The voice he heard when he pressed the phone cautiously to his ear was so wonderful, so comforting that it threw him off guard for a moment. It was comforting because it made him remember╔remember how peaceful things had been just the day before with him, Yoite, Yukimi, Raikou and Gau, all sitting around and laughing╔.being happy.

Now that was all going to be different.

"Yo, Miharu! It's me. You behaving yourself?"

Miharu bit his lower lip to contain himself, fighting back the emotions he dare not reveal.

"Miharu?"

"Yukimi-san, where are you?" he managed once calmed.

"Me? I'm...in the middle of some surface world work. You aren't starting any trouble for the leader and Ichiki-san are you?"

Of course he would hear about that...

"Hattori-san lost to me and threw over a desk and stamped his feet even though he's supposed to be a good adult. I'm the one who was troubled." It wasn't the entire truth, but it was all he could manage. His heart hadn't completely calmed down from earlier, and now that Yoite was 'missing' again, things were becoming more worrisome.

After a momentary lack of communication on Yukimi's end, Miharu sighed into the phone. "I'm talking about a game of cards..."

Lightbulb.

"Ahh, I see..." Another pause, "Imagining that freaked me out a little. Please don't say things like that."

Miharu could only imagine the expression present on the gunner's face that very

second, and it made him feel all the better. However, just as he was prepared to relax, Yukimi's voice came over the cell again.

"Aah, anyway...Be good, okay?"

No...

"I'll call later. See ya."

His heart thundered once more before blurting out without warning. "Yukimi-san!"

There was still a faint sound of breathing, so he was certain the blonde hadn't hung up on him. Now was the moment he could get it out, the questions he'd been begging to have answered.

"Do you╔know who Sora is?"

His pulse quickened in anticipation. Little did he know, Yukimi had been on a quest to discover the very same thing.

"Sora?"

"'He wasn't there from the beginning' Yoite said..." Miharu's eyes widened, "Nah, nevermind, it's nothing." It didn't take him too long to realize that the person he'd been waiting for had returned with bag in hand, and for once the green-eyed boy was thankful of the other's lack of hearing.

"Ah, wait!" he heard Yukimi call into the phone, but it was too late now. Far too late to drag out the answers he'd so been hoping to find. "What's wrong, Miha-"

"The cell phones out of range."

Click.

Shoving the phone back into his pocket, his breath caught as Yoite stepped close to him, stopping just a foot in front of him. Had he heard the conversation? What was he supposed to do now? What would happen if his damned curiosity and foolish questions drove Yoite away? What if-

He blinked.

Yoite knelt down, setting the paper bag in his hands on the ground and began to pull out the contents within, one by one.

A water bottle, no, four of them, band-aids, gauze...

"What is all this?" Miharu asked. Was it possible Yoite hadn't heard the conversation? Could his furious heart finally be calm again?

"There's a pharmacy nearby. I paid with the money on the phone." While the words came softly, Yoite reached with one hand to remove the glove of the other to reveal the ashen skin beneath the fabric. "I guess Yukimi charged the money onto it in advance."

The words barely registered with the boy whose eyes were intent on watching as those hands became uncovered, allowing his mind to haze over for just a couple of seconds back to the memory of how they felt pressed warmly to his heart.

Sometimes he felt he would develop a hatred of certain articles of clothing that stopped him from being able to see something as simple as hands. The thing that truly bothered him however, was that hat...that hat the shadowed those beautiful eyes...

"What...?" Yoite asked cautiously with an uneasy tone in his voice.

"I was just thinking I was surprised that you know so much about that stuff." Miharu bit out quickly.

'That works.'

Sure enough, the other seemed to buy into it easily as he took one of the water bottles and poured the clear liquid over the gloves in his hands. "If I use things a little, I can understand them."

Miharu's heart gave another dangerous jolt as one of those hands lifted, closer, closer until the cold wet glove met with his cheek gently, being used as a rag to wipe away the dirt he was certain was present on his face. The action was so surprising, but so loving in the way he was being touched that he could only gaze up into his mirrored reflection in the other's eyes.

Taking a minute to complete the task, Yoite took as small step back before motioning toward the damp and ruined socks on Miharu's feet, urging him silently to remove them and sit. The younger of the two did as he was told, still lost deep within the depths of his thoughts as that same see-through liquid was poured over his cuts, stinging and cold but at the same time soothing with who was doing it. Surprised wasn't the right word at all. Even though he had been allowed past the shell more than usual, there was still no way he could possibly know what was inside of his head, or his heart. He knew nothing about him...Nothing at all.

'Hey, Yoite, what will we do now?' he questioned silently, watching as bandages were placed upon his aching skin. 'The Daya scroll was left behind in Yukimi- san's car...and Yousei-san's been quiet for a while now. Even our place to go home has been...'

Yoite's head was lowered, black tresses falling in front of his face from beneath his hat. Was he crying? Crying again...tearing once more at Miharu's already tender heart.

'Are you worried? Scared? Sad?' what could it be? He knew absolutely nothing anymore...no, he never did. 'If I speak these words, I fear your heart will burst like a popped balloon. So I won't say anything.' The night before had been so sensual, so sweet, so tender╔full of meaning, and yet...the moment he voiced his thoughts, he felt that another great part of Yoite had chipped away. 'Even now you're so close to breaking...'

He was unable to speak╔but there was nothing to stop him from wondering.

'Hey Yoite...I really want you to tell me. if you don't want to die, then why is it that you don't want to live?' He imagined it in his mind, the happy outcome...the unexpectedly amazing response.

_"I don't want you to erase me. I don't want to be apart from you." Yoite would say. He would assure him that nothing could go wrong, as long as they were together, nothing would go wrong._

But that could never happen.

'I want to ask you all of these things, but I can't speak a word.'

It was hopeless.

'Yoite?' he blinked, looking down.

His heart stopped dead in his chest.

The boy he had been silently questioning was in front of him, laying what seemed peacefully on the ground. So peaceful in fact, that he appeared to be...

Miharu jolted forward, taking that frail shoulder in his hand and shook it hard as his breath caught in his throat, the fear swelling deep and painfully inside.

"Yoite!"

Blue eyes snapped open in shock as the actions seemed to get through to his friend, causing him to bolt up from where he lay, leaning on one hand, the other rubbing his temple.

"Miharu-just now, what..."

**SMACK.**

He was stunned, staring wide-eyed at the young shinobi whose hands were flattened against his either cheek above the reddening marks that had begun to throb almost instantly.

What was it? There was pain imbedded inside of the forest-green eyes, a fear so deep it made a chill flurry through him.

"What..."

"DON'T forget the promise you made╔.You can't die until I erase you."

Yoite's own heart felt like it had jump started. Miharu was there.

"If you die, I'll curse you..."

The words made him fight a smile╔how was it that through the discomfort and pain he'd felt in his life, this boy and this boy alone could make him feel like nothing could go wrong? Loved...

"I...Is that so..." Yoite was unable to withhold his lips from quirking up slightly, something so brief it wasn't even caught by Miharu. That boy before him that was suffering╔because of him╔the one who gave him strength and let him rely so heavily upon him was going to be burdened with fleeing for the rest of his young life. His head lowered pitifully to the voice in his head. "We can't go back to the leader's place again╔and we can't go ho-"

Home...? He knew no such thing.

"Back to Yukimi's house, either. What can we do?"

At the lack of answer, Yoite lifted his gaze, nearly shuddering at the determination in those eyes. Why was he looking at him like that? It almost resembled back when...

"What...?" his lips parted on the single word, not even noticing his own hat present between Miharu's fingers. He could feel his face threaten to heat up, which only increased when Miharu leaned in closer, those gorgeous eyes peering intently into his own, causing questionable jolts of pleasure to flutter through him through the look alone. That feeling was returning, so strange and foreign yet familiar and...and...hot...

When Miharu's lips fluttered across his own, he couldn't suppress the gentle mewl that was drawn from his lips.

That feeling...

That feeling that didn't go away as Miharu pulled away once more to look at him with a gentle smile on pleased lips, pushing the hat onto his head which in turn pushed his hair in front of his face. Blushing heavily now, Yoite stared wide-eyed at him without knowing what to do or say.

That feeling...that was the sensation he liked to call 'Miharu'.

It was the only sensation he needed to know.

"Anywhere you go, I'm going." Miharu whispered through a smile as he tenderly took the time to push the silky black bangs from his eyes. "I'm not going anywhere. We're in this together."

That smile was the only thing he needed to see.


	3. Chapter 3

Human beings are curious creatures, fueled by their emotions and willpower. They form packs with those they feel comfortable with, or those they find profit out of, and they shun the weak ones from society, casting them aside like mud. Yet, how is it, that even when a being is shunned by one, there is a possibility that another separate being will form a bond with the outcast?

Storm clouds overhead swarmed in silence, making threats though no rain yet fell. It was lost to him-the sixteen-year-old kira user, the emotionless shinigami, the one who lived to cause only suffering…He was still too caught up in the eyes that bound him and caressed his very soul so sweetly it was breathtaking.

How long had they simply gazed upon one another, he wondered. The hand that had moments before been present on his hat was now cupping his cheek tenderly, gentle thumb stroking what was left of healthy skin, the owner's smile still ever present as he peered into Yoite's eyes. The touch was warm and inviting as it always was from this boy.

No words were spoken. Just actions. Just skin caressing skin, eyes with such an intent gaze it felt as though Miharu were making love to his very core, making him tremble and quiver, making his breathing catch and lungs threaten to give out on him. His skin tingled where that thumb touched him.

Previous worries were cast aside when those lips ascended forth once more to meet with the corner of his mouth, pausing there as if asking if the action were okay.

How was he supposed to know whether or not it was fine? He was shaking too badly for it.

Finally, he tilted his head just enough for their lips to brush together, a gentle sigh being released from him and mirroring from Miharu in turn. How was it that such innocent actions could make them feel so wondrously weak?

"M…Miharu…"

Was that his own voice? It startled him how weak it sounded to his ears. Weak, as well as needy.

His eyes fell to look at those lips as they pulled slowly from their naïve kiss. His heart gave another jolt as those flush rosy lips formed the name he'd come to call himself by so long ago.

* * *

"An assault on Kairoushou…?" Gau's breathing caught in his throat, his eyes wide with shock and question, fingers shaking from where they rested at his sides. Shaking his head slowly, he glanced briefly at the rosy-haired samurai beside him as if asking for reassurance, but found none there.

Hattori sat before the two bewildered males, a serious expression on harsh features. His fingers were flying skillfully over the keyboard in front of him.

"Yoite and Miharu…why…would they betray us?"

After another moment of silence, the leader of Kairoushou gave a small shake of the head and nothing more, his voice low when speaking. "We've put 'Kasa' in charge of tracking them."

Gau's eyes widened slightly at the words, alarm written over his face.

*We'll find them eventually." Hattori's gaze didn't lift once.

/Raikou's brows furrowed slightly, lips forming the word 'Kasa' before gasping and jolting forward, raising his voice for the first time to his leader. "Kasa? 'Kasa' as in the Special National Intelligence? Why to find Yoite?"

It didn't make sense. None of this was making sense to Raikou or his young comrade. Miharu and Yoite weren't the type to betray, or so they thought, and even though he never before questioned the elder male in front of them, there was a large part of him very curious at how much of the story was true.

"We already have a connection to them from the 'front' world, so we're just using their services again. Don't worry about it. Kasa is extraordinary with the people they send out."

The news was unnerving. In his current state, it was obvious Yoite would be unable to defend not only himself, but Miharu as well. Then again…would Kairoushou be truly foolish to harm Miharu? Their only connection to the hijitsu?

"Ichiki is taking care of leading them. Please continue trying to find the location of Mr. Kumohira. It's not necessarily part of your mission, but please take care of it." The large hand of Hattori reached forth to snap the laptop lid shut, eyes finally lifting to meet with Raikou's magenta ones. "Of course, if we find Yoite from that process, then…"

Then…

Gau jumped slightly at the feel of his bag vibrating, blinking in question before reaching down to unlatch the front to slip a hand inside for his phone. "It's from Yukimi-san."

As he handed the device to his partner, he barely was able to catch the expression given by Hattori. An almost unreadable expression, yet one that was hiding just a visible hint of something wicked.

Gau held in a shiver from those cold eyes, yet Raikou failed to notice what he had.

Lifting the phone to his ear, Raikou began, "Yukimi-senpai…" He paused, brow lifting just slightly.

"**Yo, did something big happen yesterday at the main house?"**

"No, nothing yesterday."

Gau's eyes widened to the conversation. 'Raikou-san…?' Why would he….

"**Are you sure? Is Yoite there with you? That brat hasn't been keeping contact like I told him to."**

"Yes, Yoite's with us right now."

'Raikou-san…why would you…' Gau's gaze grew weary as he watched the man in front of him. His heart was pounding hard in his chest at the thought of the one he looked up to betraying the one he hoped to save. 'Raikou-san…'

A chill jolted through him when those lips he secretly watched curled into a smile, whether it be a false smile or not. The same sort of smile was mirrored in Hattori's cruel features.

"Are you sure you're just not blocking your messages?"

"**Has he been running a fever again?"**

"…No. It seems like he just doesn't want to go out."

Gau felt his heart being torn into two, not knowing what to think at that moment. All he could do was watch, watch as the samurai smiled and laughed so easily as he deceived the one who was meant to be their ally.

"**Well, keep an eye on him, alright? Make sure he doesn't do anything too stupid. See ya."**

"Okay. See you the day after tomorrow at 1pm."

Click.

The phone snapped shut and fell easily back into Gau's hand, fingers trembling barely noticeably as for the first time in several minutes his gaze broke away from the other male.

"That's a wise choice." Ichiki's frightful voice broke the air like a knife, causing the poor young boy's heart to jumpstart once more. "There's no need for you two to be misled by Yoite or Yukimi."

'What's going on…?' His brows furrowed greatly, and for just a moment he was lost, just as he had been before being saved by the one he looked up to. Admired…

'Raikou-san…'

* * *

The tin coating of the building the two teenage escapees hid in clanked loud and harsh as the storm outside had picked up violently, winds whipping relentlessly. Rain fell heavily against the roof, and the air had turned even colder around them.

Yoite shifted where he lay, head resting on Miharu's shoulder, knees pulled close to his chest as they often were. Shortly after their heated kiss, the sixteen-year-old had fallen asleep nearly instantly, or rather, fell unconscious on the other.

It wasn't so much that Miharu minded, it was simply the fact that it frightened him how easily his companion had grown weary. A twinge of guilt still ebbed in his heart at the knowledge that not only had he made Yoite uncomfortable, but he quite possibly hurt him. Maybe not physically, but still…

It was the mental wounds that took the longest to heal.

Miharu hadn't been able to fall asleep through the majority of the night. The thundering tempest was warring outside just as his own thoughts were inside. The closer and closer he got with Yoite, the further away it actually felt they were. It was only a matter of time before he would have to grant that painful wish…perhaps that was the reason he was so eager.

Closing his eyes briefly, he leaned back to rest his head and make another poor attempt at finding peaceful sleep.

**"_You poor boy, so confused with your own feelings…."_**

Miharu's eyes flew open to find the source of the voice, though he knew he would be unable to find the speaker. No, this was a voice he was all too familiar with. One that he hadn't heard from in a long while now.

**_"Why don't you grant your wish, Miharu-kun…? You could be so happy…don't you want to live in peace with this boy?" _**An invisible hand, yet one he was able to feel, slithered carefully along his cheek, making him fight back a flinch.

"Yousei-san..." he breathed the word, shaking his head lightly as his brows knitted together.

_**"You're so worried about granting his wish…why won't you grant your own? Listen to me, Miharu…You are never going to be happy until you give yourself over to your own desires…" **_

"Stop." He spoke the demand boldly. "If being erased is what Yoite wishes, then…"

If he didn't know better, he would say he could feel the frown form over the fairies' smug lips. Her snowy-white tresses were slipping around them like several groping serpents, strangling them, corroding them…

**_"_**_**Miharu-kun…"**_she whispered into his ear, causing several unwelcoming shivers to flutter through his spine.** "Miharu-kun…you foolish child. You still don't completely understand everything, do you? Why won't you accept what you know you desire…?"**

"Miharu?"

Miharu gasped, jerking up with a start as the fairies' aura seemed to fade away once more, the gentle voice from the boy at his shoulder pulling him from his momentary daze. His startled green eyes turned to look at the older boy who was now sitting up, his own blue gaze focused with just a hint of concern at Miharu.

"You weren't breathing…" Yoite spoke the words softly, frowning intently now.

Those blue eyes made Miharu's heart sink deep within his gut…the reminder that he would soon be gone from the world, whether it be from the kira or the Shinrabanshou….it hurt. It hurt almost too much to look into those eyes.

He shook his head faintly, instantly averting his now guilty gaze. Immediately throwing on the smile he normally saved strictly for those he wished to play, he perked up and folded his hands neatly in his lap.

"Ah, I'm okay. I was just thinking about how nice the rain sounded, I guess I just got a little pre-occupied."

Yoite seemed taken aback by the expression, not even registering the faint tint of red to his cheeks and looked away himself, not speaking another word.

Wrapping his arms about his knees, he reached a hand to pull the bill of his hat down over his face more than it already had been.

It was then, that the first time in a long while, the air seemed so thick and strained between them that it rendered them both silent. It was painful and stiff, awkward and uncomfortable…it wasn't the way it was supposed to be between them now.

'Yousei-san…why did you choose to show up to me now?' Miharu silently inquired. 'Where have you been all this time? I needed you before, and you weren't there. Why now? Why here?'

Why…

All they could do now was to wait through the night, pushing forward in their journey of what even they were unaware of their next move.

* * *

"Raikou-san! Wait…" Gau's eager and slightly pleading voice echoed faintly through the hallway as he hurried to catch up to the samurai who was walking quickly ahead of him. Raikou was far too quiet, and it was making him even more nervous than he had been previously.

"Raikou-" Gasping when the older male stopped abruptly in his step, the young tempa-kun felt his face flush some when he accidentally ran into Raikou's back.

There was something definitely strange about the way Raikou was acting…

"Gau?" The name was spoken coldly…but why? Had he done something wrong?

It wasn't for several seconds that he realized Raikou was waiting for him to ask his questions.

"Is it really okay like this…?" The question was hesitant, unhurried and cautious. "Yoite-kun…do you really believe that he assaulted the leader? It just doesn't seem like-"

"You know better than to question something like this, Gau."

The boy flinched at the bitter tone his companion had taken. It was enough to make him look away.

Enough to make his heart drop.

* * *

The sun was kind enough that next morning to shine down upon the slumbering boys, blessing them for even just the shortest of times with its' warmth. The rain had lifted in the early hours of morning, and the wind had momentarily died down.

A soft yawn came from the younger of the two, who soon stretched out on his back, arms extending above him as sore and tender muscles were able to relax. Though he wasn't certain of when, he was relieved that morning to discover that he had apparently found sleep during the earlier hours. He paused, blinking several times when he felt foreign warmth pressed snuggly against his left side. Rolling a tad in his spot, his eyes widened at the sight he found.

Yoite was nestled up against him, curled into a ball with his head tucked against Miharu's ribcage. His slender fingers were curled into the hem of the boy's shirt, the other hand was near his face, which made the sight even more precious. It was…adorable, to say the least.

Miharu couldn't bring himself to move at first. Everything about that moment was far too sweet to ruin.

Bringing up his own hand to carefully touch Yoite's brow, he lifted it more to carefully push the tanned hat from where it rest, now only partially on the other's head. A tender smile touched his normally emotionless lips, and just for a moment, he gave in. The hand that had taken the hat trailed lower slowly until he was able to push black bangs from the beautiful pale face, fluttering gently over the dark lashes that cast shadows across his cheeks. Those fingers continued south along the soft nose, eventually stopping on those sweet and addictive lips that were so amazing in the rare chances that a smile was shown.

Sighing to himself, he moved his hand away when Yoite began to stir.

Deep blue gems fluttered open slowly, unfocussed, yet wide awake. It was an odd mix, but then again, since when had Yoite been like everybody else? Sitting up and leaning against one hand first, he brought the other to rub his temple slightly.

"What time is it…?"

It took Miharu a moment to register that they were still so pleasantly close, but the moment he did he began to push himself into a seated position as well. Shifting so that he could get into his pocket, he pulled out the phone that he had neglected use of.

"It's almost ten. We should probably leave soon, now that it's not raining."

Yoite simply nodded to the words, side glancing at the waters that were still present beside them. Reaching over, he offered what was left of one to Miharu, taking just a small drink himself.

The morning was peaceful as it should have been. It was just the two of them, words not needing spoken and both knowing the truth behind the statement. The night before had been full of nothing but guilt and fright, uneasiness in times that were already harsh…it was nice to be able to take things slow for a change.

As the two set out, all that remained as evidence of their time spent in the abandoned building were the discarded bottles of water and tiny box of gauze.

Miharu was taking care to step along the pavement of the sidewalk easily, his feet still bare with the exception of the bandages about his ankles. He watched every step he took with caution, yet still moved as if nothing were the matter.

What day was it? He didn't know. There were many times when it was just the two of them that time would simply slip from his grasp and be lost. Reality wasn't something known to him often in times like these, yet he still wondered frequently if his own feuding thoughts were appropriate in situations like this. He knew so little about the other, but there was still the obvious attachment he held to him. It was an odd attachment, but one he would trade for nothing else in the world.

"?"

He lifted his head to follow the now pointing finger, gloved once more. Yoite was motioning toward a small store across the street, and Miharu nodded in understanding.

Upon entering the store, the clerk greeted them with a friendly smile and approach, receiving barely a word out of either of them.

"Excuse me," Miharu finally spoke while taking a glance about the area curiously, "Do you sell shoes here?"

The woman smiled instantly, hands lacing across her lap when the young boy finally spoke up, though the taller boy seemed to be making her feel rather uncomfortable, for understanding reasons.

"Right down that isle there, sir…"

Miharu traced a single finger along the shelves of the various shoes and sizes, not showing even the smallest hint of interest in any of them. For several minutes he eyed each box, every shoe before finally stopping short in his step and taking one of the multiple containers from the shelf. Slipping his feet into them, he rolled his ankles curiously, taking numerous steps to be certain they would be comfortable enough to walk in and smiled brightly to the store clerk. "How much are these?"

"I'm afraid our sale just ended. They're about 2784 yen, sir."

Miharu's expression instantly dropped. He brought a hand just short from covering his mouth, biting his lower lip in a cute manner as his ever-practiced flush worked its' way onto his cheeks. "These are so cool, but they're so expensive…" he whispered with tears welling heavily in his eyes. The woman's chocolate eyes widened with surprise, guilt hitting her instantly when Miharu continued, "B-but I want them…"

A few sniffles here, a small pout there…

His charm had caught him yet another prize.

"How about half price? Or even half of that!" She exclaimed, hand clenched over her heart at the painfully adorable sight before her very eyes.

A bright smile met with the boy's lips, perking up happily as she rang them up.

"It's 1250 yen…"

"They're so cheap!"

Waiting by the door, Yoite's expression was unreadable as he watched the scene unfold strangely unlike anything he'd ever seen before. Truly, his companion was a wicked one.

"Yoite…"

The voice was nearly too quiet for him to hear, but that wasn't important. The important thing was that he had said it, spoken it with such a sincere and pleasant expression on his face, that Yoite couldn't help but to push forward again for another kiss, hesitant arms encircling Miharu's waist and pulling him just slightly closer before pausing as if realizing he was doing so, and simply sat there with uncertainty.

"Yoite?" Miharu purred against his lips, seeming unable to refrain from smiling when he questioned the name. He couldn't help it. He felt that he was slowly getting through to the other, making just a bit of progress.

That beautiful blush Yoite now wore covering his entire face made it completely worth it as well…

Smirking faintly to himself, he reached up to carefully caress Yoite's lower quivering lip, waiting for some reaction only to smile more when the blush deepened. Only then did he move his hand away.

"Kumohira-sensei knows where to find the Engetsurin…I'm sure of that. If we can manage to find out where it is…if it's hidden in that house…"

Yoite lowered his head, giving no more than the smallest of nods. There was a large part of him that felt the unwelcome burden of guilt settle over him, knowing that he was the cause and reason of why Miharu had to turn on the people he once called his friends. What was worse was the fact that now not only were they sneaking around under Thobari Kumohira's nose, but now they were reduced to sneaking under Kairoushou as well. If he hadn't lost himself, this would have never happened…but if he hadn't disobeyed, then there was also that possibility that he and Miharu may never have been together here, where they sat and were able to talk. Just the two of them.

The happiness he gained from this knowledge made him feel worse…it was killing him.

Miharu reached out a gentle hand to touch the kira wielder's knee, understanding how he must have felt. "Let's stay here for the night. We can start out by morning…If it's going to rain, it's better to stay out of it."

'I don't want you hurt any more than you already are.'

Just slightly did Yoite's head lift to the words, and for a moment he remained this way before lowering it once more and scooting back against the mountain of sacks to rest against it, drawing his knees close to his chest comfortably in the manner he normally could be seen in.

Inwardly smiling at the fact that the other seemed to have accepted the idea, Miharu scooted back just as he had until his back made contact with the wall, setting his hands in his lap casually.

This place was silent and eerie. Naturally, it should have sent chills up the young shinobi's spine, but even if he were to try to feel discomfort, he could find nothing frightful here. They were alone, right beside one another. Miharu leaned back completely to gaze upward toward the ceiling, shivering when another powerful gust of wind whisked inside from the shattered window to his and Yoite's left.

'Kumohira-sensei…Kouchi…Raimei…' These names and familiar faces flitted through Miharu's busy mind, one by one. Their smiles that he wondered whether or not he would ever be able to see them again…'Raikou, Gau, Yukimi-san, Kazuho-san…' Would these faces be lost to the two of them forever?

His attention was caught with the faint rustle of fabric beside him when Yoite shifted from where he sat.

Several tablets still unopened shook along with the now ungloved hand that held them, those trembling fingers popping one of the many pills free and brought it to his mouth, holding it there for a moment as if to contemplate whether or not he would be able to swallow it whole. After a moment of deep consideration, he boldly pushed the tiny object past his lips with a shudder, visibly having to work to finish the small task.

"…Yoi-" Miharu's voice was cut off as a violent cough wracked through the other boy's body, his clumsy ashen fingers dropping the remaining tablets to the ground as the hand that once held them clutched now at his chest.

"Yoite," Miharu leaned forward to rest a hand on his lower back, taking one of the nearby bottles of water from before to press to the older boy's lips once it was open. "Take a drink, it might help…"

The cold and soothing liquid poured past Yoite's lips as he tried his hardest to fight another cough. It did appear to be helping, even if just in the slightest. Shuddering to the cool sensation fluttering through him, Yoite finally let out a shaky sigh when the bottle was taken away from his lips, a bit of the clear chilly liquid managed to escape from him to dribble slightly onto his chin.

The holder of the Shinrabanshou allowed his eyes to wander slightly downward back to those lips, watching the substance with a hint of interest in those foresty depths. Those lips had previously felt warm against his own, and each time they would share even the tiniest of pecks, it would cause something deep within him to stir, though he didn't know what.

Fighting the urge to do the first thing that came to mind, he instead reached up a hand to brush the remainder of the cold liquid from Yoite's chin and lips then instantly pulled his hands back to him, eyes falling to rest on the fallen packet of pills. There were very few left, and he wondered what would happen once they ran out…without being able to go back to Kairoushou, what would happen to Yoite's health…?

"Miharu…"

The voice was subtle and small, breaking-no, broken.

He looked up in order to meet that gaze, but those eyes were closed now, facing away from him and remaining as equally shadowed by his hat and bangs as by his eyelids.

At first he wondered if Yoite would continue speaking, but the feeling and anxious curiosity was replaced almost completely with the wish that he wouldn't have spoken when he finally said his next words.

"I'm sorry…" it was a lower tone now. Something about it reminded him of a frightened child…why…? Why was he sorry? Why was he always looking down on himself and wishing for his own tender soul to perish? This was something Miharu couldn't understand…but he couldn't ask. Not that…

His vision was hazy, the sight before him of the hunched boy was beginning to blur…

'why…?'

Yoite gasped out as he was pulled snuggly into those smaller arms, those tender arms that once again held him close to his chest, firm yet gentle, conflicting, just as his emotions had been. Before he could fully comprehend what had transpired, Yoite had his head tucked up and under the younger boy's chin, ear pressed to his collarbone, feeling the warmth radiating there regardless how cold Miharu's skin really was from the previous exposure to the wind.

As time passed since his first meeting with Miharu, he was trying his hardest to grow accustomed to the feeling of another's touch, though it would never stop being difficult, he figured. Human touch was never anything he could be used to. After all, the only experience he'd had with it was the few times his 'parents' would urge him into the next room, telling him to be quiet. After all, they wouldn't want the neighbors to see such a despicable creature living under their roof, would they?

He recalled one time shortly after he'd turned eleven…

_**Sitting there, the young boy gazed down at the counter in front of him, eyes glazed over with tears that threatened to fall. The liquid red that dripped from his hand was staining the surface of the once reflective marble to dribble dangerously onto the floor. His 'mother' had gone out of town for the weekend to visit her sister's, and his 'father' had fallen asleep in his living room chair, the sound of the television echoing painfully loud as a ring to his ears. **_

_**It wasn't the fact that he'd accidentally slit his palm while trying to open a package of food that made him cry. It was the fact that he knew the bloody mess that was now the counter would soon be discovered, and yet again he would be scolded, tossed aside. He was a disappointment once again to his family.**_

"_**S-Sora-kun..?" came a cautious voice in a low whisper from the doorway. The boy instantly recognized the tone, but did nothing to acknowledge it. He wasn't allowed to.**_

_**Reaching over shakily to take a paper towel from the dispenser, Sora flinched visibly when blood smeared there as well which in turn made his heart beat more furiously within his small chest. Taking several more, he hurriedly tried to scrub away the offending substance, eyes wide now with terror within them.**_

'_**I'm sorry…' his quiet voice screamed inside of his mind. 'I didn't mean to…'**_

_**Tsukasa hesitantly approached his brother- the boy who was often forgotten and treated like dirt, though he could never understand why. "Sora-kun, are you okay…?"**_

"_**Go…Don't touch me…you aren't supposed to touch me…" the frantic eleven-year-old squeezed his healthy hand around his torn one as if trying to force the bleeding to stop. "Go away!" he cried out in hysterics, frightening the young adolescent who showed nothing but concern. **_

_**Sora was normally not supposed to leave the basement. He knew that, but he also knew that he had to get something to eat that day. It wasn't the first time his father had forgotten to feed him, after all, and there were many times he had to fend for himself...even if it meant being sly about it.**_

_**Tears spilled freely now, blurring his vision. It hurt, everything hurt…He was so afraid of what he'd done, that he didn't know what to do. If he didn't clean up this mess quickly, he would have to feel that awful feeling again…that ultimate dread that made his heart ache and cry to his very soul.**_

_**Just then, a long arm was extended from the doorway, a large hand was placed on Tsukasa's shoulder, pushing him gently aside and into the next room… **_

_**Silence…**_

_**The silence made his ears ring and burn…**_

_**That hand, that hard and strong hand that he'd come to fear was approaching him, reaching for him, closer and closer and closer until it stole every last ounce of breath from his lungs, and before long those frightful digits snatched him up by the throat to throw him painfully off of the stool and onto the cold tiled floor beneath him. **_

_**He cried out, immediately huddling to protect himself, though he knew he had no right. **_

"_**How dare you show your face here? You are never to go near my son again!"**_

_**It was that harsh voice that made him cry, with or without the physical contact. Those words that would remind him that he was nothing but a death god, a virus to the purity left in the cold and cruel world. **_

"_**You've contaminated everything! Everything you touch!" **_

'_**Please…I'm already broken…don't….'**_

"_**You even contaminated her!"**_

'_**Please! Don't say it! Don't say it, not that…anything but that!'**_

"_**You shredded her from the inside!"**_

'_**I'm so sorry!' **_

"_**Murderer."**_

'_**I want to die…I want to go away…I don't mean to hurt you so much…'**_

_**His voice died out in his throat, not wanting to open his eyes even once. It was true…he was nothing but a pre-mature murderer. Even before making his way fully into the world, he was branded a killer and nothing more. In the moment that was meant to be full of smiles and loving embraces as a new child was born into the world, there was nothing but pain and suffering and depression….**_

_**Because of him.**_

_**Because he was a death god.**_

_**Because he murdered his mother.**_

_**Snatching his shunned child by the hair, the man dragged him to his feet, forcing him back to where he was meant to remain in the shadows that he'd grown so accustomed to, blood staining his once white shirt**_

Yoite's brows furrowed to the memory, and Miharu noticed the way he would tense in his arms, but he spoke not a single word. All he could do was to hold him closer.

Father…mother…family….these were all things that were undefined in Yoite's eyes. The closest he'd witnessed to a father was Yukimi, and as far as he knew, he would never see the man again. The most motherly affection he had ever received in his life was from Seki Hanabusa, that warm and welcoming woman that they were about to sneak around…

What was he supposed to believe in anymore?

"Yoite, you're bleeding…"

He was…but he didn't want to move…Apparently sometime while he was pondering the events of his past, his nails had somehow managed to dig and cut into his palm, over the faint, nearly invisible traces of a past scar.

It was only when Miharu gently urged him to sit up, even just a tiny bit that he moved. Taking up that hand to observe the broken flesh, Miharu's eyes refused to show emotion at all as he gently brushed his thumb over where the blood was beginning to bead to the surface. Tenderly caressing the palm for just a moment longer, he eventually reached for one of the band-aids that had been left over, and took care to make it sting as little as possible when he placed it over the pained area. Shaking his head faintly, he didn't give an ounce of warning before bringing that hand up to his face and press a sweet kiss over the spot, warm breath fanning out across the skin.

"Stay here with me…" Miharu breathed the words without wasting a second. It was the only way he could voice his thoughts without scaring the other off…he couldn't ask him to take back his wish…all he could do was to plead in a separate way…ask that Yoite would not flee to the deepest depths of his mind…

He wanted him, and all of him to be there, be complete and awake, mentally and physically…Nothing else was ever as important.

This was their bond.

There was no need for details between them. This was a difficult, but understandable fact that Miharu had come to accept willingly.

He didn't want to erase him, but if that's what the other desired with his entire heart, then he would not disobey that wish. Not once.

'Will you let me heal you? Someday, if not now?'

He questioned silently, placing quivering kisses along that gorgeous hand…it didn't matter to him how many bruises and markings covered him…He was stunning and beautiful.

A creature who had been torn and mangled inside and out…but whose beauty had never truly diminished.

'Let me…'

Miharu begged in his mind, slowly looking up to meet with those eyes that he had come to love so much…

Faces lifted and drew closer, lips met with heat, a sort of heat full of sincerity and love, both seeking something without having to speak a word. Yoite's newly bandaged hand rose to brush feather-light over the face of the only one he would ever be willing to give his everything to…The one that he would finally accept as the one he loved.

Eyes fluttered shut at the same time, symmetrical movements to match their mirroring heartbeats. Miharu's kiss seemed more urgent than normal…he wanted so badly to hear that voice again, there at that moment. If he could send the other into pleasure, even if it was a pleasure felt only briefly, then that would be enough….

'Oh please let me…'

His hands began to lightly caress Yoite's now trembling shoulders, fingers curling into the fabric of that coat, the coat that dare to hide the addictive sight he knew was beneath it. Pressing forward slightly, Miharu's lips fell upon what he could reach of his companion's throat, putting his everything into trying to reduce the other to a puddle of delight.

'Let me make you forget…'

"Miharu…" Yoite whispered with mixed emotion. That overwhelming sense of heat was beginning to cloud his senses, and it made him shake more with being unable to hold back what Miharu caused within him.

'Let me show you that there are still wonderful things left in the world…'

Fingers danced beneath his sweater, pushing it to reveal what he could, Yoite's own fingers now clinging desperately to Miharu's arms. He found himself arching to those lips and fingers, eyes wide to stare at the wall opposite them. His heart was pounding furiously as every one of those sensations swept over him dangerously once more, and he couldn't comprehend what was going on around them any longer.

"M-Miha…" he tried again, only to be silenced when those enthusiastic lips sealed over his ear to cause several tumbling waves of pleasure to wash over him.

"Wait…M…"

It was far too much…

"Not…"

He couldn't grip it…

"STOP." He finally gasped out, falling completely against that small chest now, his clutch on Miharu tightening to an almost painful extent.

Miharu's expression shown pure shock…but why? At himself? Why was he acting so desperate now…? What had he done? Had he hurt him?

"…Yoite…." He mouthed, stun still strong over his features. "I…"

Yoite shook his head slowly.

It was too soon…too much too soon…too much for him to handle in his current state.

The younger boy didn't know what to do…so he did the only thing he could do. To hold him.

'I'm sorry…'


	4. Chapter 4: Sora

Silent gazes followed the unsuspecting teenagers below, fingers curled slightly against the branches of the tree the owners of those menacing eyes were perched in. Brows furrowed just slightly from one assailant who soon motioned to the other toward the two who had been walking together along the once crowded streets.

From below, Miharu's newly bought, or rather, conned shoes, clicked softly along the pavement, a slight bounce to his step as if he were testing out his new prize. He side-glanced at his companion, who was quiet as always, walking side by side with every step. This fact that Yoite said so little was an odd sort of comfort to him. It meant that things were normal. It meant that he wasn't coughing, or that he wasn't crying and upset…everything just was.

That's how it should be.

To any who had been paying close attention, they would notice the faint, barely noticeable smile curve just slightly upon Miharu's soft lips as they slipped under the cover of the bus station which was entirely vacant by this point. After all, with the gathering clouds above, it was only natural that very few people would actually take the chance to come out of their homes. The faint sounding of a muffled vibration could be heard, but he made no move to acknowledge it. For the past hour of walking, the phone that was kept secure in the older boy's pocket continued to ring off and on, and yet it continued to be ignored. Surely Yukimi knew what had happened between them and Hattori. Yoite was avoiding his calls like the plague, and Miharu didn't blame him. Or perhaps it was just natural that Yoite wouldn't answer, even under different circumstances? After all, since when had he been talkative?

Miharu's gaze dropped briefly before speaking in a soft voice. "Yukimi-san…I wonder if he'll get mad and start chasing us…"

Yoite's blue orbs seemed to follow suit, falling almost instantly to the ground to the boy's words. Of course it would bother him. From what Miharu gathered, Yoite had no real parents, let alone any family of any sort. Yukimi was the closest thing he seemed to have, and the thought that the only father-type figure in his life hating him must have been something difficult to cope with.

Shaking his head a bit, Miharu nodded to the sign across from them on the inside wall of the shelter, approaching it with an extended finger to read over the schedules.

"We can ride the bus from here and buy tickets at the train station." He smiled as if trying to himself get the depressing thoughts from invading his mind. "We can get a time-table, and buy a bento box, then-"

"Where are we going?"

He stopped mid-sentence, turning to Yoite who had taken a seat upon the bench. The question took him by surprise. After all, it was one of the first things he'd heard all day from the other.

Taking a deep breath, he answered, "Banten."

As he expected, Yoite's head lifted, brows knitted together as if in confusion.

Miharu continued, "We don't know where Kumohira-sensei is, and all of their books on ninjutsu have been burned…but if we go there, we might get some clues on the hijitsu's activation ten years ago. We have to make sure we aren't seen by Raimei or Kouichi, and we have to stay unnoticed by Hanabusa-san."

Yoite averted his eyes, surprise and something else…regret? Something almost unreadable written across his face, shadowed by the bill of his hat. Clearly, something Miharu had said made the gears deep within the older boy's mind begin to turn at an odd rate. "We have to make sure that all works, and then try talking to Kazuho-san."

It didn't go unnoticed by Miharu that the medicine the other was so used to taking was beginning to run low, and in their current situation, they couldn't afford to be hung up too long in a single place. It was dangerous enough as it was, knowing that they were being pursued by the Kasa members who were not only intent on taking him back to Hattori and the Kairoushou, but also intent on taking the kira user's life.

Hesitating a moment, Miharu watched as Yoite lifted a hand to his face as if to cover it a bit. Clearly, he was worried about something. Frowning slightly, the boy took a seat beside the other, fighting the urge to place a hand on his shoulder. "It's okay, Yoite…"

Yoite's hand lowered, though he didn't turn to meet Miharu's eyes, instead staring far off into the distance at nothing at all. "No, it's fine. You'll get back to Banten."

'Something is different…' Miharu's mind whispered to him, but he tried his best to ignore it. It was rare that something threw him enough that his expression would physically fall and his apathetic demeanor would waver just enough to show concern.

Were they drifting further apart…or the opposite? It was impossible to tell anymore, but as the wheels and engine of the oncoming bus whirred as it approached, it was difficult for him to worry himself anymore. The advancing vehicle gave an odd sense of hope for the two, as if they had somehow managed to take one step closer in their journey.

"Let's go."

The looming figures overhead narrowed their cold and expressionless eyes as Miharu and Yoite made their way together onto the bus, knowing how difficult things would be if they were to attack a crowded place. It would make things virtually impossible, and it would prove less than useful to have their faces seen in such a panicked crowd. All they could do was to follow the bus, knowing that soon enough they would be able to accomplish their mission in gathering the Shinrabanshou and destroying the kira user.

* * *

The blonde gunner glowered down at the cell phone in his clenched fingers with agitation, the message across the screen reading blank. It was the fifth time he'd tried to contact the boy since giving him the matching phone, and it only bothered him further. Sighing heavily with a shake of the head, he shoved the offending piece of technology into his pocket harshly as if to teach it a lesson not yet learned.

Yukimi grumbled to himself angrily, biting his lip harshly. "Stupid Yoite….so ungrateful…" Luckily, there were no passing people to witness his angry rants. Shaking his head, he gazed upward along the large building in front of him, a tall cross placed neatly upon the top of it. For the past few days, he had been doing his best to piece things together…to learn something, anything about the boy he'd taken in years ago.

He wasn't certain what caused him to finally become curious, as he'd never even given these sorts of things a second thought before. Perhaps it was the knowledge the Yoite had finally begun to get close to another, and it wasn't him. It was Miharu. The Shinrabanshou, the apathetic boy who had fallen so suddenly into all of their lives. He wasn't certain why it bothered him so much…after all, it wasn't as if he'd truly made a large effort to get to know Yoite…

The card in his pocket reminded him that it was for the better. There had to be some reason Yoite was the way he was…

Just days prior, Yukimi had finally spoken up and questioned his sibling about the boy. When he was presented to her in the past, his neck had been slashed by some form of blade, the shirt he'd been wearing was covered every inch in crimson. The only thing Yukimi had to go off of, was the hand-made card that had been placed in one of the pockets of that bloodied apparel. That card had lead him here to this church...

Hesitantly pushing the large doors open, it seemed that there was no one present. The cathedral was enormous on the inside, several benches and a bulky altar within, all illuminated with color and light that shown through the stain-glassed windows which surrounded the building's walls. As opposed to others who may have felt a sense of comfort in such a place, the only sensation Yukimi gathered from such a place was uneasiness. There was something strange about the church, and it was impossible to place just what that feeling was.

Just then, his heart skipped at the sight before him. His blue eyes widened when he spotted the child sitting just feet from him, gazing off into the distance with expressionless eyes. It was those empty orbs that the man had known all too well, and yet, this child was not one that he was aware he'd come into contact with before. What was he gazing upon, he wondered. He turned to look, only to see the sunlight illuminating the altar, showing beauty within the space he stood.

"Isn't it beautiful?"

A voice caught his attention from behind, causing him to turn in question. The pastor of the church, no doubt. The man who stood in front of him held a kind smile upon his thin lips and gentle eyes that seemed as if they held all of the knowledge in the world.

Just like that, the child sitting upon the bench whose eyes mirrored Yoite's, was gone. Perhaps Yukimi's own eyes had been playing tricks on him…

"It's an old church, but that window's soft light never changes."

Blinking, Yukimi contemplated a moment before reaching into his pocket to retrieve the card he'd been so curious about, holding it out to the man with curiosity. "Hey, I was wondering…have you ever seen this card before? I mean, does this have to do with this specific church?"

Taking a closer look at it, the father gasped softly, taking the paper from Yukimi's hand to hold it up to his face as he adjusted his large glasses upon his nose. "That's definitely a card I made, but how did you…?"

"Do brats-" Yukimi paused with an awkward expression, sighing as he corrected himself, "children…visit here often?"

"Well, yes…though it's only at the Christmas and Easter celebrations. "

"Was there ever a kid, small for his age with a pretty face that came here? " The gunner asked, holding a hand to his left side up to his chest in order to signify the height he was referring to. The pastor seemed confused for a moment while in deep thought. "How do you say it…" Yukimi tried again, sighing in defeat, "He's really pale and thin, has really long eyelashes…uhm…He probably hasn't been here in about two years…"

Lightbulb.

The other man looked up with shock written across his face, taking a sudden step toward Yukimi and catching him off guard. "Two years…Do…Do you know Sora-san?"

"Sora…?"

"Sora-san always sat in the back by himself…"

Yukimi gazed upon the spot he'd earlier seen the vision of the charming young child, knowing full well what he was referring to.

"He never prayed, just sat straight up. He always looked at that window's clear light with calm eyes. He was all alone…"

Alone…

"But strangely, his eyes never held a hint of loneliness."

Yoite…

That was a look Yukimi knew by heart. Since the day Yoite had come into his life, those eyes never once wavered. That empty void of darkness seemed to have pushed the emotion away, perhaps in the thought that he deserved nothing. It was saddening…

"He had the aura of a child who would not get close to someone and in exchange not hurt them…excuse me…but how do you know Sora-san?"

Yukimi shook his head faintly, eyes serious and refusing to meet the other's. "Oh…A person whose given me both light and dark will soon pass away…I don't know if he'd directly related to Sora, but…he has one of your cards and knows Sora. I want to know about something that's connected to him, however small that may be. It's probably a lot to ask, but I want to know…"

No, it wasn't so much that he wanted to know…Curiosity had little room here. It was that he had to know. Something. Anything…Each and every day that passed made him only wonder more, and it was becoming too much to just wonder…. He remembered back to the day Yoite had come into his life. A tiny frame, that familiar hat that was unusually large at that time though it now fit him perfectly. Even his clothing seemed unnaturally big…almost as if he was trying to put as many impossibly layers over his lithe frame to stop others from coming into contact with him…At that time, Yukimi couldn't have cared less. The boy was a burden to him, a simple task laid upon him by the leader.

It wasn't until that day, that horrible day that things began to change…

_**Three days…Three whole days had passed since it had begun. Yukimi's fingers worked quickly over his keyboard, brows knitted together in concern that he was unwilling to show to anyone else. The sobbing from the other room rang in his ears, every sound was a whimpering cry torn and hoarse, sounds that no child should ever have to make.**_

_**He'd come home to find the boy that had been left in his care hunched over in the corner, screams of agony leaving the normally silent lips. His arms were wrapped about his shoulders, nails digging harshly into his skin as if he were trying to rid himself of it. The sight was unnerving, and though he tried to ignore it, the blonde man felt his heart wretch at the sight. **_

_**Calling his sister, Kazuho had rushed over as quickly as possible to monitor the child's condition. After just an hour, it was obvious what was happening. **_

_**He had grown half of a foot in an hour. It seemed that the stunted growth brought on by the use of the kira at such a young age had finally taken full affect, and his body was trying to catch up with natural occurrence as fast as possible. Bones bent, skin tore, tears fell freely from the boy's eyes as he writhed upon the couch he was placed on.**_

_**Thinking back to it, Yukimi shuddered at the sight. It scared him. Truly scared him. What in the world could possibly have been horrible enough in the child's life to make him wish for this agony upon himself?**_

"_**Yukimi…" Kazuho's tired voice broke his concentration. She carefully laid a hand upon his shoulder, and as he turned to gaze up at her, tears ran down her face. Tears of worry and pain herself. She had always been a kind-hearted person, and he could understand how seeing a boy of that age in such a suffering state could easily take effect on her. **_

_**Rubbing her sore eyes, she smiled faintly. "I think it's finally over...his breathing has finally begun to relax, and he doesn't seem as uncomfortable…" **_

_**Nodding slowly, Yukimi let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding and stood on stiff legs. Since when had he become such a softy for children, he wondered. **_

_**His heart thundered as he made his way cautiously into the next room, eyes widening at the sight before him. The small child that had been originally presented to him was no longer small. Curled onto the sofa, was a thin, trembling and almost impossibly tall male, raven black hair strewn messily across his dampened forehead. His now long nails seemed to have eased a bit from the grip they'd had on the cushions, and his breathing was shaky and slower now. His clothing had to be removed days before, due to the rapid growth he was going through, and now all that covered him was a blanket. **_

_**Strangely enough though, even through all of the agonizing ordeals the teenager had to go through, he still made himself conscious and aware enough to protest when the siblings tried to make the move to remove his clothing. Yukimi had to leave the room before Kazuho was allowed, and it seemed as if she had already had some knowledge that was still unshared. A secret that only she and the boy shared. **_

_**It was the first time those deep sapphires opened to him…**_

_**They made something change within him, and yet it was something strangely foreign that he didn't know what to make of it. **_

_**Even after undergoing such an experience, the younger male not once gave up. He was conscious within the hour, and after all of that, the only concern he'd had was that his hair was too long. That voice had become silent once more as those now long and slender fingers held scissors out to Yukimi, the other hand tugging faintly on the now shoulder-length tresses of black…**_

Smiling faintly to the memories, Yukimi gave a gentle sigh. "I want to find that last time he was alive, and when he goes, I want to be next to him, and say 'you were definitely alive'."

* * *

_**Falling snow and an extended hand. Why was it that the snow always seemed to have such significance? White, purity, clean and gentle within the eyes of all who would gaze upon it's beauty…**_

_**A young child smiled at the falling substance, a hand extending to watch the gathering white upon the tips of his small frail fingers, a tender happiness across his face. **_

_**Unknown to him at that time, the smaller boy which had silently grown so fond of him watched him from afar. Those large eyes full of curious wonder watched the sibling they were forbidden to know, watching that tiny smile that was so rare but so full of purity that it would make anyone's heart ache.**_

_**Tsukasa knew that his brother snuck out of the house frequently, but not once did he speak of it to his parents. He saw no need. There was nothing wrong with the boy in front of his eyes…Just the opposite in fact…Just watching him here, out in the snow, he looked like an angel descended from heaven, though cast aside by those who were blind to his beauty. He longed to hold that hand, smile at that beautiful face, just…be able to know Sora. Who was Sora? **_

_**Who was Sora…**_

Opening his eyes slowly, Tsukasa removed his cap from his dampening hair, eyes peering up thoughtfully at the rain which had begun to fall, pattering upon the ground beneath him to gather within the grass. Even now, he remained in the place of his childhood, though his parents had long since left. No, not that…it was he who chose to leave his parents. There was something from his past that he had yet to forget, and yet to remember correctly. A shadowed night when he was too young to make clear sense of the world as it was. A blade in his hand that was placed there only by his parents, the staining of cloth by crimson, and frightful sobs of sorrow and pain…

* * *

"_**Sora is a death god…"**_

_**Cold eyes and gritted teeth…**_

"_**You killed your mother!"**_

_**Harsh words and terrible hands…**_

_**These were things that frequently came back to haunt him in his deepest of dreams, though he had desperately tried to forget those feelings. Humans were humans…one could never completely erase their emotion. **_

_**It was the night after his fourteenth birthday, his presence was meant to be erased, destroyed by those who had chosen to ignore him. As they ascended upon him, backing him deeper into the shadowy corner of the frightful room, he spotted the blade glinting with what little light was allowed to him. That light shattered his soul, tore into his heart just as that blade tore into his flesh, tearing his neck, and the only thing he could do was run…**_

_**He ran, legs tired, pulse pounding, blood dribbling down from his wounds as tears spilled freely from his eyes. Perhaps it had been better if he would have remained there and allowed them to finish it…His family would no longer be burdened by him…he was meant to die from the time he was born…**_

Letting out a shaky breath, sapphire eyes opened to peer in front of him, blinking away the water that threatened to fall. Why was this all coming back to haunt him now? The wheels of the bus were quiet and soothing, a small hum as it made its' way down the seemingly endless road, and all Yoite could make clear was the presence of his friend sitting so closely beside him, staring out at the pouring rain.

Yoite could barely hear it plundering upon the roof. His vision was nearly black by this point, yet for some reason he was no longer bothered by it. It was to be over with soon, yet that would mean breaking the promise he had made to Miharu…

Miharu, the only one he would ever feel truly safe around. That boy who sat contently by his side, no longer asking questions or protesting, not showing fear of him...

"It should just be a few more minutes before we get there." Miharu spoke almost to himself, not once looking away from the window but watching Yoite through its' reflection.

It was a feeling of guilt squeezing his heart hard enough that it was nearly impossible to breathe…he wanted so desperately to think that Miharu was with him in order to simply be there…but there was always going to be that part of him that knew had he not originally forced the boy by threatening the lives of his companions, that there was a large possibility they would not be sitting there together at that moment.

"Yoite?" Miharu's voice was sweet music to his ears, a hand falling to rest upon his own.

It seemed that every time he would feel fright and discomfort, even the smallest touch or word from the younger boy would give him comfort and bring him back from the harsh depths of his mind. It was soothing…something he never wished to be without.

Why was it that the words he wanted to desperately to speak would stick in his throat? It was hard, but he wasn't ever one to speak or act on his feelings. All he could do was to let it build up, and pray silently in his heart that Miharu would stay with him.

Their eyes met with understanding, and hands squeezed light and gentle as if to simply say 'I know'.

Their trip continued in the silence, comfort and understanding were what they knew.

It was these small moments that were precious, and they would live them to the fullest.

* * *

The swarming clouds overhead shown menacingly to the boys below, the once light rain now pounded harshly down on them, bouncing from the streets to dance upon the ground.

Miharu's bangs clung to his forehead, making it almost impossible for him to see everything in front of him. Trudging through the muddy grass, he and his companion were beginning to find it difficult to continue forward as the rain began to pick up and whip past them again. Miharu's arms were around himself tightly as if to block as much of the offending liquid as possible, though it was obviously pointless to make the attempt.

Even Yoite seemed more tense than normal, though he kept his arms by his sides, head low as usual.

The train station was just ahead amidst the fog and rain, and without pondering the idea beforehand, Miharu's fingers curled into Yoite's, which made no move to rid of the intrusive grasp.

Just a few more steps, and they would be out of the rain…just a for more…

Miharu's expression fell again at the sight ahead. A crowd of people surrounding the sign…the sign that seemed to by itself cause yet another cloud to appear overhead.

**NOTICE OF SUSPENSION**

**Due to the storm, a landslide has occurred over the tracks. Trains around the area are still functioning, but the tracks near this station will be unable to operate for about a week. **

**We are sorry for the inconvenience.**

**-Station Master**

Never before had such simple words caused such an ominous sensation to flutter through the green-eyed-boy's heart. They were running out of time, and both understood that all too well. Yoite's fingers tightened just a bit on their companion's, whose own returned the reassuring squeeze, though in truth, neither knew what to do.

Sighing faintly, they stepped further beneath the cover of the station, shivering as the realization of just how soaked they were hit them.

"If we can find somewhere to stay until the rain lets up, we might be able to hike to the next station over…Hopefully it won't be too long." Miharu sighed the words as he tried to wring out the bottom of his shirt, watching the dripping water from his clothing form a puddle beneath him. Gazing down at his reflection in the water, he looked pitiful. His hair was a complete mess, cheeks slightly pink from the harsh winds, entire frame shivering with discomfort.

Yoite looked no better, it was just that he seemed to hide it better. Perhaps it was the series of layers he was constantly clothed in.

Wiggling his nose a bit at first, Miharu gave a soft sneeze, lowering his head even more as another unwelcoming rush of the chilly wind swept past them from outside. The small noise however, seemed to catch the attention of two of the men in front of the teenagers, one turning to approach the boys with an expression of concern across his face.

"Oh…" he frowned, noticing how drenched the two appeared to be. "How unfortunate…You're going to catch a cold if you stay out there…were you hoping to catch the train?"

Miharu nodded softly without actually looking the other in the eyes. No, those green eyes had trailed to their friend, watching the small shivers that he tried to hide so much.

"Do you two have anywhere to stay?" The man turned to Yoite who naturally said nothing. Frowning more, he shook his head and motioned for them to follow him. They didn't really have any other choice, after all, and the only thing they could do was to follow this kind stranger back into the rain and toward the car.

It was an awkward ride, completely silent between the boys, with the exception of Takahiro, as the man later introduced himself. His gaze continued to bounce between the road to the mirror, watching them as if they were marvelous exotic fish stuck behind the wall of a fish tank. It was strange, to say the least, and caused a blanket of discomfort to fall over them.

Miharu allowed his eyes to drop to the hand that was still firmly placed in his. The sight was warming to him, kind and comforting. The feeling of Yoite's fingers wrapped gently in his own caused tenderness to well up inside of the young shinobi's heart, and he never wanted that sensation to go away.

Back when they'd first encountered one another, something seemed so strange, and yet not once had Miharu feared being harmed by the other. Sure, he was frightened for his teacher, as well as his companions, but even through the brief physical pain Yoite had directed at he himself, he never once felt the need to be afraid of Yoite. Perhaps it was those eyes that mirrored his own, showing that there was something deeper that perhaps even the older boy didn't know of. Back then, Yoite would use every excuse to stay away from Miharu's touch…

'There's no need to be kind to me…I don't need anymore unwelcomed feelings.'

It was wrong…it was so wrong at that time and especially now. Everyone needed feelings…everyone needed a bit of kindness, even if just a little. Otherwise they would break…He never wanted to see this boy beside him break. He'd witnessed the pain within Yoite's heart too many times to handle it.

"Here we are…" The driver spoke up, turning to gaze at his passengers. "Come on in and I'll give you something to dry off with." Perhaps it was that he didn't realize there was something more between the two, something that couldn't be described in words…the following series of questions seemed too pointless for either to answer as they curled up around the heater.

Miharu's shoes had been set to dry, his sleeves rolled up to his elbows and a dry towel around his shoulders. Yoite on the other hand, seemed more reluctant to follow through.

"Are you two siblings?" Takahiro questioned the silent children with curiosity and wonder, brow lifting with every question. "Where are your parents? Did you phone home? Are you running away from home…?"

Silence.

The two boys simply scooted closer to one another, not once raising their eyes to the friendly voice.

Blinking, the older man finally seemed to let up on his irritating inquiries and leaned away slowly to give them their space. Obviously neither was talkative, and both perhaps shy. "Oh well. It's late, so stay here for the night. I'll draw the bath, so just get warm." He reached behind to take up two sets of identical clothing to hand to the others, though only Miharu took them willingly. "If we wash your clothes now, they will be dry by morning."

After a moment of holding the clothing out to Yoite with no success, he sighed and tried once more. "Here, you take them off too." He spoke while motioning to Miharu, who was already nearly undressed, shirt only partially buttoned now.

More silence.

This time Miharu stepped forth with a questioning look and a tilt of the head. "Yoite…?"

"I'm fine like this." The boy spoke suddenly as his grip around his knees seemed to tighten.

"You shouldn't…what id you get even sicker?"

Their time was already cut dangerously short, and Miharu knew they couldn't afford to leave Yoite in such a condition if it could be prevented.

Yoite curled into himself more as the two approached him, allowing his hair to fall more into his face to shadow it from their view. "I don't want to…" his voice was small, almost childlike now. "I'll be okay."

Miharu gasped as Takahiro extended a hand to touch Yoite's shoulder, only to be harshly slapped away.

The sixteen-year-old's hands raised to pull the collar of his coat higher, brows furrowing faintly before whispering in a nearly broken voice. "It's embarrassing…"

In any other situation, Miharu would have found the expression adorable…but now, it was chilling to him. He understood too much, much more than all others did about the boy, yet in terms of emotion, he knew nothing that was going on inside of Yoite's mind.

The three of them sat there without a word for several minutes in thought, until finally one spoke up as if coming to some pitiful conclusion.

That conclusion, of course, was incorrect.

"OH. You're a girl? Sorry…"

Yoite's eyes narrowed dangerously, glaring daggers up at the man now, his own voice far too bold for himself. "**NO.**" he snapped.

Never before had a scene felt so awkward to Miharu that it rendered him clueless as to what his reaction should be. What was he supposed to do? He knew why Yoite was defensive, but he didn't understand it, and he knew nothing about this kind stranger who held the confused expression of a man who had awoke to find that he'd grown an extra arm from his forehead. What was he to do?

"Well, do whatever you want…" The man grumbled to himself. "Kids these days…" and left the room.

Miharu's gaze hesitantly turned to meet Yoite's, though of course the boy still had his head lowered too far to be able to see his eyes. Taking a cautious step forward and kneeling down until they were eye-level with one another, Miharu's gentle hand lifted to touch Yoite's shoulder, taking the moment to check whether or not he would be pushed away, and continued when he saw that he wouldn't be. His fingers danced slowly along the boy's shoulder and collarbone to slip just slightly beneath the collar of his coat, pushing the heavy fabric carefully from his shoulders.

"Please?" he asked softly…only then did Yoite's own eyes lift. There was a hint of defeat within their depths, and Miharu fought a smile when he knew he had gotten through to the other. Slowly moving to his feet, Yoite took the clothing that had been previously offered and made his way to the bathroom which was just the next room over, and closed the door.

For some reason unknown to him, Miharu always seemed to get through to him…why?

Sighing faintly, he shivered when he pulled the sopping wet sweater from his head to set it neatly on the counter beside the sink, gloves following suit.

"…"

The reflection in the mirror caught his attention, and blank eyes of the deepest blue lifted to take a closet look. It was getting worse…no longer could he see much of his hands, but the reflection's blackened and torn ones. It reached past his elbows now and over the entirety of his chest, shadows of what once were. It was this mangled body that covered his own, and no longer could he comprehend what was him and what was that shadow.

Shinigami…

Kira user…

Sora…

Who was he?

How was it, that even though he was here, breathing, heart beating, pulse pounding, he still had no true identity? Sora, Yoite, shinigami…the line between these things was impossibly blurred, even now.

His gaze held dangerous with his reflection…it was that boy in front of him, no, not boy…it was this shadow of a person that was meant to be erased…

_**Death god**_

Gasping out, a hand clasped over his mouth harshly as a violent cough wracked his body. He bent over the sink, trembling uncontrollably at the blood that dripped from his fingers, the once white and clean sink sullied by him. Dirty…he felt dirty…he was dirty. He had no right to even be there…he…

"Yoite?"

Miharu.

Shaking harder, he tried quickly to finish dressing, quivering fingers turning the knob of the sink to rinse out the evidence of what had just happened, refusing to turn in the direction of the speaker. Of course it was inevitable to hide things from Miharu this far in. The expression of worry had already broken clear to shatter the apathetic stare that continued to follow him. Silent steps approached, then loving arms wrapped carefully around the thin waist of the frightened boy, holding him close as if to shelter a child from the cruelness of the world.

Yoite was a child…He was afraid of himself and the world, having never had that comfort of another's touch. Due to this, he was afraid of others now…How could he not be?

"It's alright…" Miharu whispered soothingly to him, the hands that had been around him pressed flat over the place where his heart beat. "It's alright, Yoite…"

Yoite's breathing seemed to calm slightly to the gentle words that met kindly with his ears.

"It's alright…"

He felt the need to surrender to those words once more.


	5. Chapter 5

The gentle touch of Miharu's fingers entangled with his own, soft and loving caresses against his cheeks…

Yoite's blue gaze held questioning to his companion's from where they now lay in the room that had momentarily become theirs. Just moments before, he'd felt the need to simply give up, a silent voice inside of his mind urging him to give in to the pain he felt…but when those gentle foresty eyes met with his own pearls of the deepest sea, it was over.

His footsteps became silent to his ears, vision a blur to everything but the boy in front of him who always led him so willingly and so kindly. That smile he had tried to ignore but had inevitably fallen for in the end. He was Miharu's, and that was alright with him. Sora, Yoite, it didn't matter who or what he was so long as that hand could be felt within his own.

Miharu had taken him back to their room, and even though two beds were present, they still chose to curl beside one another for comfort upon only one. Each on their backs, heads turned as if looking away for just a second would shatter their bond.

The room was dark and full of shadows, the only light was that given off by the warming glow of the heater in the mid of the room. Just a hint of light reflected from Miharu's glossy eyes, and before Yoite could prepare himself for it, the boy before him sat up on his elbow to lean down until those beautiful eyes came closer, closer until he could feel the warmth of Miharu's breath upon his lips.

Their lips brushed together feather-light then, and all they could do was to hold on to one another, fingers tightening slightly with reassurance that everything would be alright in the end.

There was little knowledge of what would happen in the future, and at that moment, it was the last thing on either's mind. The comfort of feeling the other's lips was soothing and sweet, like the savory aroma of the most addictive milk chocolate known to the world. Each held onto the other as a lifeline that only they had access to.

Miharu's free hand lifted to allow his gentle fingertips to caress over the baby-soft skin of Yoite's heated cheek, each digit sliding tenderly along the flesh presented to him. His heart sang with happiness, knowing that his friend was doing nothing to move away. These words unspoken between them, the nameless bond that tied them together was stronger than any rope…

In the past, neither had known the wonders of another's love. Friends, family, regardless how precious, they were minuscule to the emotion the two shared between them. This was what they were. Understanding, hope, gentleness…This was what they knew and cherished.

Yoite's lips parted on a nearly silent gasp just as Miharu had pulled back to gaze upon that beautiful face. The fingers that had been so caring and kind now fell lower to feel the supple texture of Yoite's lips, smiling affectionately at the softness he felt there. The kira user's dark lashes cast shadows upon his snowy-white cheeks, making him appear as fragile as a porcelain doll.

He was fragile…but he certainly wasn't weak. This was one fact that Miharu had taken with care and held close to his heart.

Yoite's lower lip quivered to the sensation of those fingers, and as their eyes met again, he found that those lips moved lovingly against Miharu's fingertips, caressing them with the gentleness that was his mouth. Beneath the cold chill that was his past, there was a small, innocent child beneath who craved the affection he deserved all along.

Smiling as he watched Yoite kiss his fingers in a lover's manner, Miharu leaned down again, hand moving away so that their lips could meet again on a breathy whisper. "Yoite…"

The heat overwhelmed them as if normally did with their kisses, however chaste they may be. Slow movements, each acting as if the other were breakable, and each savoring every second they could spend together. For several seconds things remained this way, and it wasn't until Yoite gave a faint sound a happiness deep within his throat that Miharu's tongue snaked out to barely caress the lower lip of his friend, asking silent permission to go further, allowing the other to know that he would never be forced.

Tongues met then with a unique type of passion. Breathing became strained, even with the slow movements of their mouths. Miharu's palm cupped Yoite's cheek sweetly before he sat up a bit more than he already was, scooting just slightly closer until his knee nudged slightly between the older boy's, and to his surprise his legs parted willingly. Now with hands resting on either side of his head, Miharu sighed shakily with bliss.

The only audible sounds in the otherwise silent room were the diminutive pants and the slight rustle of fabric upon skin.

Heat grew, fire sparked, tongues danced in the seductive and most ancient of rhythms known to creation. Yoite's hands lifted to slip into the deep brown tresses, holding Miharu firmly to their kiss as his movements seemed more eager now. It was a hushed need, and Miharu knew it all too well, as it had been something he fought time and time again around the other.

Shifting once more in his spot, Miharu's knee brushed gently against the intimate place between Yoite's legs, mirroring the sweet mewl that left the sixteen-year-old's lips. It was an addictive noise, fueled by the developing flames sprouting from within them both. Like that, those feelings from several nights prior had returned…

"Yoite…" Miharu breathed out, pulling away to nudge his forehead to the other's, lungs straining to gather breath. His heart thundered loudly in his chest, loud enough that he could have sworn he could hear it chiming in his ears. It was a wonderful sensation spurred on by the touch of the other.

He watched Yoite's expression as he continued to carefully rub his leg against the spot it had been resting, moaning out beautifully as Yoite rolled his hips a little. He was hooked…Addicted…He was too far gone.

Sweet sensations, subtle urging…it was driving them deeper and deeper into the depths of forbidden pleasure.

The buttons of Yoite's shirt, which were only still only partially fastened were leisurely discarded as small, thin fingers took their time to reveal the beautiful skin he knew waited beneath. He didn't care what had happened to Yoite's body now, or in the past…Yoite was Yoite, and he was perfect in the boy's eyes.

His lips traced low, barely coming into contact with Yoite's soft ones as they descended. They fluttered across a sharp chin and further to make love to the forever engraved scar upon his neck.

Miharu's curious fingers raised and stopped short of touching the scar, figuring it was a less than intelligent action, especially since he had just gotten the other so willing to allow any contact. He didn't want to take the chance to ruin this. But still…

Yoite shifted beneath him finally to sit back on his elbows, seeming suddenly uneasy for some reason, almost as if he was afraid of the expression that even Miharu hadn't realized he had on his face. True, though he could not see his own face, Miharu in fact had a questioning gaze which could easily have been mistaken as a look of distaste if the receiver was in fact, looking for that sort of expression. Sitting up quickly, quick enough to render himself near dizzy, Yoite almost sent Miharu off of him as he moved to push his shirt back down. The younger boy had barely had time to catch himself on his hands, blinking questioningly at such a hasty action.

"Yoite? Did I hurt you?" he inquired. Though he knew there was no possible way he had been too rough in the events that had taken place, he also was well aware of how fragile the kira user's body had become. The image of his skin alone was proof of this.

It was here that caused his suffering…He knew that. This was the reason he wanted so desperately to erase what pains of the past plagued his love, and replace them with the greatest pleasures known to the universe. Yoite was his, and this thought urged him on. After a long moment, the older male relaxed once more, a faint sigh fluttering from his lips.

Yoite's breathing had become strained long ago, the strange sense of dampness that had formed between his legs making his heart pound harsher. The teasingly cruel knee that so wickedly rolled against the front of his pants made him pant and writhe for more.

"M…Miharu…" he gasped as the boy's lips fell lower, that seductive tongue coming into contact with the gentle buds of rose upon Yoite's chest. Sparks flitted through his lithe frame, making him visibly tremble and audibly whimper. He wanted, no needed more.

Those small fingers cautiously caressed that soft chest, reveling in the way Yoite's lips would stall with each tender touch. Miharu couldn't help but to smile into their kiss, parting his lips enough to take in the other's lower one and suckle on it as if it were the sweetest candy known to man. It was true that Yoite's body had been failing him, giving out and breaking…but in that moment, all Miharu could think was how amazing that same body felt flush against his.

There were times, mind you rare, that he would daze out for several minutes just picturing moments like this that he was convinced would never come where he could be so sinfully close to his friend this way. He couldn't really see it coming…but thinking back to it, he wondered if he was the only one that couldn't. The knowing, yet disappointed and possibly protective look Yukimi would give them every now and then when they would be gone together for long periods of time. That small smile Raikou would show whenever he noticed Miharu's worry for the older boy…then again, what right did Raikou have, Miharu wondered, to act so smugly as if he'd come across some hidden sought out knowledge that only he could see? There were times it was blatantly obvious that there were feelings between Raikou and his own young companion. If the samurai could notice similar feelings between Miharu and Yoite, what stopped him from realizing the ones he himself shared with Gau?

It was too hot to back down, and just as Miharu's hands fell to the waistband of the black pants, Yoite's own followed it down to take him by the wrist in order to pause his movements.

Green eyes lifted in question as lust-filled blue ones peered down into his.

"Miharu…" the name fell freely from his lips in the sweetest of prayers. Leaning up, those lips met with Miharu's ear, teeth taking a moment to graze almost teasingly over the lobe to cause several shuddering breaths to be torn from Miharu's lips. Miharu moaned a small sound, every muscle in his body tensing and un-tensing when he realized just how Yoite's taste had apparently affected him.

Long slender fingers massaged down Miharu's back, tracing along his spine and eliciting a quivering mewl from him.

No longer could they focus on the sounds of the room or the whirring of the heater. Where they were no longer mattered, not even the knowledge that they were running, hiding with enemies on every side. They needed no companion other than one another.

Pulling back with a bright flush, Miharu's hands ran along the skin of Yoite's chest, reveling at the way they both shuddered and squirmed at one another's caresses. It was something so intimate that the only thing they could do was to embrace one another in desperation.

'I'm sorry…' Miharu's mind whispered silently, though whether he spoke to Yoite or himself, it was unknown even to him. 'I'm sorry, but it's too much now…I can't stop, even if I wanted to…No, I don't want to…This is what I want…'

Miharu pulled back to take Yoite's hands in his own as he straddled the older boy's upper thigh. He brought those hands to his lips, pressing loving kisses to his fingers. There was love in his gaze, understanding that would only be shared between the two of them. Miharu stole Yoite's gaze, holding it captive within his own. As they peered at each other deep within the mirrored souls, their pulse beat in unison, a pure ritual made only for them and them alone. Raising their hands together, Miharu didn't stop until Yoite's fingertips touched the buttons of his shirt as if to silently question him.

There was no hesitation and not a hint of caution as those thin fingers pushed the buttons slowly through the holes, each time causing the top to fall gradually free and expose more to Yoite's view.

Not once did their eyes waver from the other's. Miharu was beautiful to him, and there was no place at that moment he would have rather been. It meant so much to the both of them, knowing that they were the only ones who were allowed to explore, allowed to caress so sweet and tenderly…

'Don't make me stop, please…I want to have all of you, here in this place, here when we can just be…'

Their lips met tenderly once more in a heated caress, moans of sensation slipping free and grasping hands roaming exposed skin, causing more of the sparks to erupt. Miharu slid down, his hot mouth placing open-kisses along the flesh of Yoite's stomach and belly button, loving the way he would shiver and writhe beneath him.

'I'm in love with you…I know I don't have to say it…I know you understand. Let's not speak, okay? You know, and that's all that matters, Yoite…'

Taunting teeth nipped and nibbled, nails carefully ran along the waistband of the older boy's pants until they were able to hook into loops and pull them slowly downward along slim hips and smooth thighs, pealing away the remaining clothing to reveal the beauty that was Yoite.

He allowed his forest gaze to trace along the new territory, breath catching in his throat to the sight of the kira user spread before him. Dampness to his skin, flush to his cheeks, pleasure in his eyes…His knees were bent in, trying to hide himself as best he could without Miharu having to move, though it was a pointless act in the end. Miharu loved his shyness. It was another thing that made him Yoite.

It was then that he realized here, in this place, was where Yoite tried to hide. But why? The boy's smaller fingers danced lovingly across Yoite's hips, feeling the shudder that flitted through him to the touch. A soft smile lay spread on his lips to the older boy's reactions. It was a sight lovely to see.

Shaking his head slowly, his smile only widened before he took the bold move to massage his lips across his seemingly sensitive hip, stifling a laugh at the adorable startled whimper he gave in response.

His hand slid lower in the darkness, heat on his questing fingers made his heart jump, and then, and only then did he realize that something was different. His fingers did not come into contact with what he was expecting to find. Absently wetting his lips, he smiled gently and shook his head when realization hit him. Nudging his face into Yoite's neck and placing loving kisses to his throat, he felt the soft patch of hair on his fingertips, as well as the bit of warmth nestled within it. Those same fingertips brushed across a hardened organ, much too small for a male and much too big for female, yet Yoite's reaction was still breathtakingly beautiful.

Purring gently against his neck, Miharu circled his fingers over his discovery, applying a small amount of pressure to the tip with his kind strokes.

'Is this why you wanted to hide from me?' Miharu questioned silently, moaning softly at the way Yoite squirmed very lightly to his touch. 'Did you really think I would care?'

"Yoite…" he whispered, rubbing the spot lightly with the tip of his thumb, adoring the way Yoite's breathing hitched when he continued. 'Beautiful…'

Miharu leaned back just enough to look into Yoite's face, brushing his lips against the other's with a shaky mewl leaving him. "Show me your eyes…" he pleaded almost silently while his fingers caressed and explored.

"M…Miha…ru…"

Moving so that their foreheads rest together and their eyes remained to one another's, Miharu swallowed shakily before slowly and cautiously altering the angle of his hand so that he could travel lower, curious at the dampness present on his fingers. Yoite's eyes instantly shut when he realized what Miharu was doing, and the moment he did, Miharu stopped in his action.

"Please don't hide from me…I'm not going anywhere, Yoite."

Seconds turned to minutes, minutes which seemed to last for hours before Miharu could smile again when those eyes became visible once more. Only then did his fingers find the cause of the slickness, circling the wet cavern present between Yoite's legs. He could tell by how hard Yoite was trembling that it was difficult for him. After years of hiding, being so afraid of himself, Miharu could only appreciate the fact that Yoite still had yet to tell him off, and the way Yoite's cheeks flushed deeper when Miharu's finger slipped inside made it worth everything, and he thought he would die from happiness.

Giving just a moment to simply stare into the quivering boy's eyes, Miharu's fingers pushed a bit further before curiously bending them, reveling to the breathy mewl that fluttered sweetly from Yoite's rosy lips. He repeated the action, shivering himself at the way Yoite arched against his hand.

Miharu's own body was hot, his breathing strained, yet he dare not let it distract him from the more important matter.

Yoite was giving everything to him and him alone.

Those loving fingers felt within, sliding deep until he came into contact with that wonderful spot…that spot that made Yoite's breath hitch in his throat. It was beautiful to watch the way Yoite so willingly arched to his touch now, no longer backing away from any loving activities…He was surrendering fully, and it made Miharu's heart flip within his chest.

Those warm fingers began to thrust long, slow and deep. Deep enough to make rational thought and smooth breathing impossible.

Miharu's mouth returned to love Yoite's hip, moving slowly there and further down until Yoite gasped out, feeling those silky lips against his hardened member, a shudder shooting through him like wildfire. The boy's eyes closed tightly, impossible shades of crimson staining his once light cheeks, though whether the flush was from arousal or embarrassment, it was difficult to say.

"Miharu…" Yoite gasped again.

The boy between his legs wore an expression of peace, lips moving wickedly over him and it only became more intense when that little pink appendage slithered from his lips to curiously taste where his hot mouth played. Addictive…Every bit of Yoite was like a drug to him, and he only wanted more. More gasps, more pleas, more of that wonderful taste…

Never before had he felt his heart pound so violently in his chest…

'Yoite…gorgeous…'

Finally his mouth enclosed over the spot to suckle slow and deviously. The older boy writhed and arched beneath him, hips giving a small jerk of unexpected pleasure, teeth biting into his lower lip harshly as he concentrated on the overwhelming heat. He tried to remain quiet, but as Miharu worked so skillfully upon him, he could do nothing but to emit a series of trembling cries from his pursed lips. Slowly…heat swelled within him, reducing him to a mess of pants and moans, hips thrusting down against the thrusting digits a bit hard, only making his voice heighten more.

"M…"

A fire burned deep inside of him, sparking red and orange and white and blue flames across his every nerve, reassuring him that it was alright that he was there, alive, feeling these sensations with this boy who gazed at him so lovingly it made him want to weep with joy.

"Miharu…" his voice was a breathy whimper. One of his hands had somehow found its way back to Miharu's shoulder, holding onto him as he felt a knot deep within pushing to the surface and threaten to snap. He wasn't certain what it was, but all he knew was that it was wondrous and blissful…

Miharu moaned a bit loudly at Yoite's flushed expression, angling his fingers inside a bit more as if by instinct, nearly melting at the mirrored moan his companion allowed to escape to the surface.

So close…he was so close, though he knew not what. He reached for it, grasped at it, moaning senselessly now at the way he fought for breath every time Miharu would caress him. Ecstasy…

"Let go…I'm right here…" Miharu's voice was strained, but full of honesty and warmth to the beautiful creature exposed to him.

There was something so striking in his eyes, that they alone caused another powerful wave of pleasure to wash over Yoite, and before he could stop himself, he sat up with quivering muscles, hand extending to snatch Miharu by the wrist to pull him almost desperately up and against his chest before falling back completely once more.

"Miharu…" he whimpered the name, brows knitted together and eyes glistening pleasured tears that had threatened to fall. "Miharu…" he repeated, shaking his head and brought his hands to tug lightly at the other's pants, only managing to pull them down an inch or two from his current position.

The fabric rubbed painfully against the evidence of Miharu's reaction, and he only forced down a sound of need.

'Is this okay…?' he inquired silently, eyes peering intent and bold into Yoite's. 'I want to be with you. I want to stay by your side until the end.'

He sat back long enough to slip the remainder of his clothing down his long legs, shivering to the sudden chill that fluttered over him, it wasn't long before he returned to Yoite, arms slipping around him in a loving embrace, his ear falling to his heart.

The sound was music…each beat a note, each note a whisper…They panted softly in the otherwise silent room, holding onto one another as a lifeline.

'I want to stay this way forever…'

The heat radiated between them, around them, through them…

'I'm so in love with you…I understand it now…'

Miharu lifted his eyes until they met Yoite's. Each heart skipped, and ragged breathing caught and held…

A tender touch of lips once more and a gentle mirrored sigh…As slim hips lifted enough to feel the younger boy's member brush against his heated skin, Yoite mewled in reaction, arms trying to pull his lover closer. Applying pressure in the kiss, each nearly melted blissfully, shivers of need and anticipation fluttering throughout their young bodies. It was mind-numbing, what they felt…

"Oh Yoite…" he whispered against those beautiful lips, another shudder dancing magnificently through his every nerve as he carefully slid into him, gasping and burying his face against Yoite's neck and shoulder at the surrounding heat. "Yoite…"

Yoite's eyes were closed tightly as he spread his legs more for the boy, knowing full well what pleasure was to come. He had already felt so much, so many emotions and so many stunning sensations…only with Miharu would he ever feel such a feeling.

Keeping his face pressed sweetly to his shoulder, Miharu lifted himself just enough to give an unhurried push into his friend, mouth falling open slightly on a faint sound of surprise. It felt so good…Here, inside of Yoite, right where he belonged. Yoite's back arched a bit to the feeling, his fingers curling more where they rest on Miharu's back, grasping at him for support from such amazing senses. Yoite pulled him closer, sighing at the knowledge that Miharu was inside…

A sickly sweet sound, an addictive mewl here and there…Miharu rocked gently into his lover's body, knowing that with each thrust they grew nearer to the inevitable bliss they knew would come…

Yoite's back arched beautifully when that place deep inside was brushed, giving a small jerk of the hips and a shuddering moan, pushing down as the heated cavern surrounding Miharu's member tensed just slightly, though enough to pull a pleased purr from the young shinobi's lips. Long and slender fingers roamed freely over the slickness of Miharu's back and shoulders, eventually weaving into the dark tresses atop his head. The hold was temperate as they moved together in the sweetest of dances, the most ancient of rituals they entered together.

It wasn't long before their breathing became more erratic compared to earlier as their thrusts grew more eager, rolling their hips with need to meet in every movement, drawing more delightful moans from deep within their very hearts. Each name a whisper from one another's lips…

Crying out suddenly, Yoite tilted his head back, eyes closed tight when that wave of liquid fire threatened to burst from within him, right in the place where he and Miharu joined…

Another push forward only made them pant out more. It was all Miharu could do to lean away enough to kiss lovingly along Yoite's neck now as his thrusts became uneven, deeper, the sensation swelling inside that he had yet to experience threatening to erupt into something spectacular…

Yoite knew it well…it was there, radiating around them both and tying them together even stronger.

It was almost too much…just a bit more, and…

The older teen gave a startled sob of bliss as that swell erupted in one powerful wave, legs wrapping tightly around Miharu's hips to pull him closer as every nerve inside of him burst into pure sensation, reducing him to a heap of blissful lava as the pleasure washed over him relentlessly.

Miharu gasped out at the feeling of the already tight cavern contracting around him hard, sending him over finally to plunge after his lover into the pleasurable depths of the sweetest abyss, milking his orgasm from his young body for the first time in his life and tearing a stunning cry of the other's name from his very lips. Hoarse voices and grasping hands, intense sensation that was unmatchable…It made them dizzy with every swell , and they continued to thrust against one another with every pulse, falling deeper and deeper into the senses until they could move no more.

Miharu fell lightly against Yoite's chest, his trembling fingers tightening their grip about the boy's frame, just as Yoite's arms remained around him, holding him captive against the place where his heart thundered loudly.

The feeling wouldn't go away…that wondrous knowledge of their sinful act continued to throb deep inside to touch their very souls and warm their hearts…

'Sweet boy…' Miharu's mind sang even as his eyes grew heavy for sleep. Physically he was exhausted, mentally he was soaring… 'Yoite…could I asked you to stay this way? Will you stay this way forever and forget about sinking into nothingness…?' it was a silent plea that he for the time being kept down, not wanting anything to take the chance of ruining such a precious moment. The way those arms held onto him, needing him above all others…

A soft sound met his ears just then. A tired smile curled the corners of his mouth when he placed it…Yoite's gentle breathing, barely a sound but enough of one to have grown so familiar with his ally.

He was gorgeous…

And he was Miharu's.

Closing his eyes once more, the young wielder of the Shinrabanshou, the future king of Nabari, fell silent to revel in the realm of his dreams, keeping hold of the one who had stolen his heart for as long as he could.

'I love you…'


	6. Chapter 6

Forest eyes gazed out at the sleeping figure, slumbering so beautifully, lips soft as petals while gentle breaths left them. Miharu had been awake for the majority of the night, listening to the way the rain gradually died out, near complete silence echoing in his ears.

The thoughts of what had happened mere hours ago still caused his heart to flutter. The two had gone through so much together, and even through all of the strange happenings that transpired often around them, they finally seemed as though they had taken one, large step forward in realizing what everyone around them already knew.

Yoite shifted beside him. The other's raven hair was gently strewn upon his cheek, his dark lashes cast shadows upon his snowy cheeks. It was all there, complete, and yet there was still one thing that bothered Miharu each time he was able to gaze at the other in this manner for long periods of time.

The deep scar across his neck, mixed with the ash-gray speckled along his delicate frame...Miharu knew that the other was broken. Lately he had been feeling uneasy. There was something foul in the air and even though he was unable at this current moment to place just what it was, he knew that something was going to happen soon, and it was something that would not be in his highest favor.  
'Yousei-san?' Miharu asked softly to himself. There was no answer...lately, the fairy was refusing to come out when asked to. This was just another thing to add onto the uneasiness in the young boy's heart. 'Yousei-san, why won't you come out?' he tried again.

Nothing...

His heart seemed to slow and sink all on its' own now. With every lagging beat, the lump in his throat would grow, and with each sensation, his eyes would burn. Why did any of this have to happen, he wondered. If he hadn't been the weilder of the Shinrabanshou, then they would have never had a reason to run in the first place. If Yoite had a different past, a family to truly care, then he would have never had to learn the kira technique, and would never have to worry about the pain in which plagues him day to day...

But then...

The thought made Miharu feel sick to his stomach. Even through the knowledge of how painful all of these truths were, he couldn't bring himself to be bitter towards them as he would have liked. Without these, he would have never met Yoite.

**_'You've finally figured it out...'_**

Miharu gasped out to the ringing voice. It startled him, forced his eyes shut until he only saw blue. A blue surrounding, faint lights that flickered in the distance. Yoite was no longer here.  
The young male kept his gaze forward now. The woman ahead of him looked back. Mirror images.

The Shinrabanshou made no move toward him, nor did she turn away from him. Her long, snowy tresses swirled almost elegantly about her lithe frame, her eyes piercing as if to drag the boy forward with their spider- like grasp. It was then that he realized he was being tested.

"Yousei-san..." Miharu's voice was gentle, uninterested, yet his heart was beating furiously in his chest. "Is it possible to really erase a person?"

The fairy seemed less than stunned by the question. Her thin lips could only curl into a bitter smile, eyes cold and unrelenting their hold on him. A slender arm reached forward, beckoning for the boy to come forth. As if on cue, Miharu's legs moved as if on their own accord. One after the other, closer and closer, leading into temptation until he was mere inches from the one who would forever plague him.

**_'What is your real question, Miharu?'_**

The question flashed through his mind, and for one of the only times since he could remember, a faint hint of alarm fluttered across his face.

"What do you mean...?"

If possible, the wicked smile the fairy had held previously to his question grew. Suddenly he was wishing he hadn't have called for her.

**_'What is it that you really want, Miharu? I can't give you my power until you understand what it is that you want.'_**

"Yoite's wish-"

**_'No.' _**The suddenness of her response made him nearly flinch. His heart felt as if it were prepared to leap from his chest and run away, back to the warmth of Yoite, but he knew that at that moment, it was impossible. He called for her, he would have to face this alone.

**_'Listen to my question carefully.' _**she continued, '**_Tell me exactly what it is that you want. Erasing a person...this is not what you really wish to know, is it? My power is mine until you dive inside to understand what it is that you crave. What is your desire? Yours...'_**

That dangerous lump was back once more, trying to strangle him so that he would be rendered speechless. What was his wish? It had been so long since he'd thought about what he desired over what he knew would be right, that he could no longer remember.

When he first learned of the power that he held, he was less than amused by the outcomes. He wanted nothing more than to ignore the words of his teacher, as well as the two who claimed to be his friends. He wondered when his interests changed...

Perhaps it was in Fuuma, staring face to face with those cold, emotionless yet seemingly broken blue eyes...Even back then, he could tell easily that there was something inside of them both that was the same. Whether Yoite knew it or not, he couldn't tell. However, when the older boy threatened him for the first time, or the second, thinking it was the only way to get Miharu to react, little did he know that the younger ninja would have gladly followed him to the ends of the earth if given just enough time to understand.

That's right...

The words spilled from his lips before he could catch them, his eyes widening with disbelief.

"I don't want Yoite to disappear."

The fairy reached forward, dragging the now startled boy closer by the wrist until they were eye to eye, fear settling deep inside of Miharu's heart.

**_'Good, Miharu...what is it you want to do? You've given your heart to this boy, haven't you? Tell me what you yourself want to do about it...Will you still rid the world of him? Will you pretend he is nothing? Will you...murder him?'_**

"Stop!" his voice rang painfully in his ears, and before he understood fully what he was doing, his arms shot out, shoving away as quick as possible. His vision was blurred, and the room spun around him fast, hard, and it made him stumble back until he was certain he would fall. Forcing his eyes shut, he was no longer certain where he was...there was nothing, only darkness, only...

"Miharu..."

Inhaling sharply for breath, those same green eyes shot open once more, unfallen tears causing them to burn. It wasn't until he forced himself to relax that he realized the boy who had been slumbering just moments before was leaning over him, concern written heavy across his face.

The light in the room was unbearably bright, causing the younger male to reach up and shadow his view from the discomfort. He was vaguely aware of the tender touch of cool fingers against his shoulder, as well as the realization that the outside atmosphere had changed. The song of birds rejoicing after the storm reminded him that it was morning now.  
Miharu took deep and careful breaths until he could contain himself. It was enough to know that at that moment, he was there with his companion, knowing that their time was still ticking, and there was nothing at that moment that could ruin it.

Yoite watched the other with questioning eyes. A smile faintly splayed upon Miharu's lips now, when just seconds before, those same lips were crying out in despair.

It wasn't his place to question.

"I washed the clothes..." Yoite's lips formed the words carefully, not knowing what else to say. Either way, Miharu sat up then with a nod. He knew that Yoite was trying to avoid asking, and in a way, he was grateful. It wasn't that they held no feelings for one another, it was merely the knowledge that they understood enough already to know that the only thing they needed was companionship. A silent understanding was what they shared.

"We should leave as soon as possible."


	7. Chapter 7: A Dream With You

A cerulean sky lay directly ahead, tinted by reddened clouds and a glimmering sun. The song of surrounding wildlife reminded all of their existence, letting it be known that the storm had long since passed and all was right in the world once more.

Puddles still remained pooled beneath the wandering boy's feet, each ripple dancing around the shoes that pattered within them.

There was a light bounce to Miharu's step as he stay barely a foot behind Yoite. His green eyes stay on the ground where he stepped, but every once in a while he couldn't help but to steal a quick glance at the other male. The experiences of the previous night mixed with the unfortunate encounter with the Shinrabanshou that morning, he couldn't help but to feel uneasy and a bit ill.

Not once did his heart cease it's painful pounding, and he was certain that were the older boy's hearing repaired, he would be able to hear it from a mile away.

Yoite paused briefly in his step, so abrupt that Miharu nearly ran into him. The younger male's expression questioned silently until they came upon a road, a highway. Perhaps they would cover more ground this way.

The kind man they'd met the night before held something curious in his eyes. Though he gladly took them in and sheltered them, Miharu couldn't help but to feel the uneasy sensation that he was convinced that they'd run away from home...but they did, right? Brows knitting barely visibly, Miharu shook the thought off. That was no home.

Extending his arm and thumb out, he mentally toyed with the idea. He hadn't seen his own true home in quite some time, nor did he ever seem to relay the truth of his disappearance to his family, knowing they wouldn't fully understand. Would Asahi, the mother he knew little to nothing about, understand?

A car passed them without so much as slowing down. Sighing inwardly, Miharu kept his arm out, fighting a look of amusement as Yoite did the same from behind him.

After several minutes, they had given up and continued walking down now along the highway. The wind was gentle about them, even if just hours before it had whipped relentlessly, murdering all in its' path. The sun was warming, and for a moment Miharu wondered if Yoite ever got hot in his clothing. This silent question passed quickly, however, as he remembered the brief times he was allowed skin-to-skin contact, recalling the chill to the boy's flesh. He found the his eyes had trailed once more to the other's back, watching him as he moved, an elegant step and faint sway. It seemed as though nothing had changed, and the other was as quiet as normal. Miharu was uncertain whether to be sad or grateful for these reasons...he didn't want things to change between them...right?

Step after step, water sloshing beneath their feet, they continued to walk for what seemed like ages, each feeling a flutter of joy when they spotted the town ahead. Their steps seemed to quicken, if just a bit, nearer and nearer to their next checkpoint.

"There's a map ahead, it looks like." Miharu spoke gently, though reached out a hand to carefully touch Yoite's shoulder when the other made no reaction. Pausing almost instantly, Yoite turned to look at the other. His blue eyes found Miharu's now outstretched hand, following it until he saw where the boy was pointing. Nodding faintly, he turned once more, this time slowly just enough so that Miharu could walk beside him.

Miharu could feel the soft ache in his chest, knowing full well why Yoite hadn't responded the first time. He couldn't hear him...

His senses hadn't been strong, not even when the two of them had first met. It was unfortunate, and for a moment the younger of the two had to mentally question how much he would have been able to take if thrown into that situation. There was still so little he knew about the other, and he was uncertain if he would ever know.

It wasn't long before the two paused in front of an enormous sign, a map, and each set of eyes scanned it thoroughly, an ounce of hope fluttering in their hearts at the knowledge that they were so close to their destination, they could taste it. Finally the sun seemed to be smiling down upon them.

"Yoite?" the voice asked quietly, touching his arm in a gentle manner to gather his attention. He took the time to motion toward a nearby street vendor, silently telling his companion to wait before running off toward the oasis in the sand.

The woman seemed friendly enough, smiling down at the young teen who had approached. "Could I get you anything?"

Miharu's fingers found their way to the counter, his chin resting just in between them as he looked up at the kind woman. He silently contemplated before reaching into his back pocket for the bit of change he'd managed to gather over the previous few days. "Two custard taiyaki please..."

Pulling out the contents of his pocket, he set it on the counter as if to sort through it, a hand lifting to cover his lower lip, a worried expression upon his face. To any who would pass at that moment, they would notice the faint hint of tears shining in forest-toned eyes. The woman seemed to notice it, biting her lower lip at the heart-wrenching sight before her. Shaking her head, she reached out with the two cakes, pushing them in front of Miharu, then placing a hand over his. "No no, sir, you're the first customer I've had today. That means you get two free choices!"

Miharu, one, society, zero.

The boy had to hold back the smirk that threatened to leak onto his lips. Leaning back, he show a bright and charming smile at the kind female in front of him, giving a polite bow. "Thank you so much!" he chimed, scooting the change back into his hand to slip into the depths of his pocket once more. Taking his purchase, he turned quickly, almost leaping back onto the counter when he realized he was about an inch from knocking into someone.

"S..." he paused, looking up into the familiar sapphire eyes that gazed back at him. "Yoite." Miharu averted his eyes quickly as he felt his cheeks flare. Once again, his heart was beating rapidly. Keeping his eyes down fully now as if to admire the dirt beneath his shoes, he hurried past Yoite, knowing full well that the other would follow him anyway.

Lately, Yoite had begun to have that effect on him, causing his pulse to increase and his skin to flush.

It wasn't until they'd reached the roadside once more that he stopped, turning to lean against the street railing, holding out the fish-shaped cake to his friend. Yoite took it gladly, though he spoke no words.

The treat was warm in Miharu's hand, and the eye of the fish seemed to stare up at him, demanding silent threats. He'd received that unrelenting sensation frequently within the past several days. It was as if something big was about to happen...something that would change him forever. It no longer felt as though they were being followed, however, which was great fortune to them, but still...

His view shifted and flowed back to his companion.

Yoite held the taiyaki close beneath his nose as if to inhale the sweet scent, a peaceful look upon his face. Over the past several weeks, Miharu had caught on easily that this was all a part of Yoite's routine. He always took the time to note the temperature, feel the shape, and take in the scent. Miharu had come to the conclusion that this was in order to replace, or perhaps imagine the taste. How much of it Yoite could actually taste, was the real question.

The two ate in silence, reveling in the knowledge that they were just short of reaching their goal. The train station could take them where they wished to go, and it was a relief to them both. The quickest way would be to reach the road on the other side of town and follow it to the nearest station.

Banten...

* * *

The liquid steamed gently in the white mug, reflecting the man who had been peering intently back at it. Yukimi's expression held little interest as he watched his drink before leaning back just enough to look at the other figure in the room, moving about to gather papers.

"There was this kid there." he spoke as he watched her. The words seemed to cause a momentary pause to her step.

The blonde gunner continued, "Tsukasa Koudou. He's living there by himself now, I guess. Parents ran off a long time ago. Kazuho, you-"

"Yes." She cut him off with a sigh. Her slender fingers lifted to push her glasses up along her nose, then continued up until reaching her temple to rub there lightly. "I know who he is. Yukimi, you know it would have been better If you hadn't...I mean..." she sighed heavily now at a loss. "So...what are you planning to do?"

The man shook his head as he brought his drink to his lips. "Nothing, really. I heard the basics from Tsukasa. But I hear it and it makes me feel more and more like there's nothing I can do. Even if he's his brother, they're not related by blood. There's no reason for him to feel responsible...so I just told him that 'Sora is dead'."

The memory of those saddened eyes caused Yukimi to close his own, brows knitting together just slightly. There was no reason to make the young boy think any longer on something from the past that could only cause the boy discomfort.

He had managed to find out the information he wanted to gather.

"Tsukasa is walking his own path. Yoite is the kira user, a human stuck deep in the world of Nabari."

Yukimi knew that his sister had been watching him with an unreadable expression, but continued nonetheless. "That's not the place 'Yoite' should return to."

Silence overtook them both for several seconds, and the only thing that caused the gunner's eyes to lift once more was the black folder being scooted toward him.

"If you know that much, you might already know this, but...Yoite is neither male nor female. You don't see people with those kinds of bodies often in society...but medically speaking, it isn't that rare."

For some reason, this came of no surprise. Yoite never was one to be classified as 'normal', after all.

"I don't doubt there must have been a gap in how Yoite saw himself and how other people saw him. People see things in black or white, back or front, win or lose. They want to place themselves into an existing boundary to feel secure. I think he's lived his life unsure of who he really is, and is unable to convince himself." Kazuho's expression was falty, unidentifiable, but an expression that Yukimi had seen the woman give several times over the past several years. It didn't matter whether or not the misfortune of another's life affected her directly or not. She would still feel the pain of it. She was, after all, one of the most pure spirits known to the outside world as well as Nabari.

Regardless whether or not the two had been related by blood, those same cerulean eyes had peered back at Yukimi. It was obvious they shared something in common.

"Well," Yukimi shrugged at the information. "Whatever he is or isn't doesn't matter. Yoite is Yoite."

* * *

Stumbling back, the kira user leaned against the chest of his younger companion, a hand placed carefully against his lips as he panted shakily for breath. His frame still trembled from the vicious coughs he'd experienced moments before, and it was beginning to feel as if he would never recover from the shock.

Keeping an arm around Yoite's waist, Miharu was careful to set him down so that he was able to lean against the side railing. Concern was written across his face now. The day had been warm and welcoming, and now it seemed as if it were preparing to fall apart. Yoite had no more pills, and he didn't do well to hide it. He was getting worse, and there was nothing Miharu could do about it.

Soft fingers lifted to cautiously brush over the pale sixteen-year-old's cheek. It was a soothing touch, and it caused those gentle blue eyes to gaze up at him. "I'm alright." his words were quiet and simple, as always, and although the young nabari no ou was still worried, he knew that Yoite would say nothing more on the matter. That's how it always was.

The sound of a motor rang faintly in the distance, catching Miharu's attention. Getting to his feet quickly as the truck began to pass, he stuck out his arm and thumb as he had earlier that day in hopes of catching their attention, and felt his hopes lift as the vehicle came to a slow halt. Yoite was in no condition to walk any further.

Helping the kira user to his feet, the two made their way over to pull themselves into the back of the truck as they were motioned to do so.

Both pulled their knees close to them in order to save room. Crates of various vegetables and fruits surrounded them, and the sweet scent of life slid easily past their noses.

The woman in the driver's seat turned as best she could in order to speak to the boy's, a friendly air about her as well as the boy next to her, whom they assumed was her son. "Where are you boy's headed? Sorry, unfortunately we only have two seats."

"To the train station." the reply was simple, yet forward.

As the truck's engine started up once more, the driver nodded in understanding, holding back the laughter in her throat when she noticed the hungry gazes the two had been giving her newly-picked merchandise. "We come to the fields from the city to do farm work. They're organic, so have as many as you want."

It didn't take long for both males to take up an apple, the savory taste mouth-watering and delicious.

Bump after bump, mile after mile, they sat in silence, both taking in the freedom of the air around them. It wasn't until the silence was broken that Miharu thought of anything different.

For the first time that day, Yoite spoke up.

"I lied to you."

Lowering the fruit, Miharu gazed questioningly at him. "Yoite?"

"There aren't any fragments in those three in banten. The kira user can leave shards of their energy in their opponents, but...I didn't leave any in them."

"Yoite."

"If I suddenly died, they would die as well. I thought their deaths would leave you a memory of 'Yoite'."

"Yoite..."

"So its' a lie."

The hurt on the younger boy's face caught Yoite off guard, and all he could do was stare. Wasn't it a good thing that Miharu knew? Knew that his friends were no longer in danger, though they had never truly been in any? Why was it then that those green eyes peered back at him as if they're witnessed the greatest betrayal known to mankind.

'Why now...?' Miharu questioned, not knowing how his friend wasn't understanding the kind of pain he was feeling. Now of all times, after they'd become so close, why...? "Why do you say that kind of thing now? I...I might have been able to use the Shinrabanshou by now...Why?"

"What...?"

"The fairy said that the only reason I haven't been able to use it by now is because I'm confused..."

The serenity that had lay over them previously that day had finally begun to diminish. Everything was going wrong.

The wind was picking up once more, howling past the once calming land. Or perhaps it was all in the young ruler's head, screaming at him that everything he had begun to find comfort in was being torn so brutally away from him.

Yoite's confession had caused something within him to burst, and he knew then that there was no way he could take such a beautiful soul away. Would Yoite hate him for thinking that way?

"I'm lost..." he spoke, lowering his head. It was true. For the first time in his life, he was utterly and completely lost and terrified. All actions had an outcome, and any action he would take in the near future scared him to death. "I promised you, but I'm lost. I don't know what to do!" Miharu lifted his forest-toned gaze to the boy in front of him, watching as the ever so familiar hat was discarded.

When those blue eyes gazed fully into his own, Miharu nearly felt his heart break on the spot. "Yeah." Yoite spoke the word carefully, as he often did. There was such emotion on his face, and such a rare moment was to be treasured, yet the younger of the two couldn't help but to feel a certain sorrowed bitterness at the sight. This desperate apology was not the expression he ever wished to see from his companion. "I'm the one that's putting you through all this pain...I threatened you and got you into this mess."

'It's all coming out...like an avalanche, it's crushing me, coming to the surface. The things I never wanted to speak...'

"Miharu, You were supposed to be protected by Banten."

'The thoughts I had to keep hidden rushed out of my mouth...'

"It's not your fault, it's my own free will. If we can't go back, then we won't!"

'It won't stop.'

Miharu shuddered at the sound of his own voice. Whatever pain it could cause, he could no longer bring himself to remain quiet. Yoite had to know.

"I wanted to know more about you, but knowing won't change a thing...because you're you, and you and I..." Miharu paused only briefly, brows knitting together at Yoite's confused, though desperate expression. "I've wished that we could stay like this and never get to Banten."

A nearly panicked expression passed behind Yoite's eyes. "What are you saying!" There was no doubt about it, the boy's fingers curling where they rest in his lap, fisting at the discomfort of the entire situation. "I can't live for much longer, and..."

"I know, I know, but because you say these kind things now..."

"Miharu, stop saying things that confuse me..."

Then it burst.

"But Yoite, I want you to live!"

Both gazed wide-eyed at one another, faintly picking up on the sound of the driver and passenger bickering about something, though their ears could not care to hear it. Everything had spilled out between them. The dam had broken, and there was no chance of putting the water back inside.

It was now that Miharu realized that there was no storm, nothing to hinder them now. Over the course of their time spent together, the two had faded, and only one soul seemed to have been present then. The knowledge made Miharu's lips curl into a faint smile, and the sudden awkwardness of the situation reflected in Yoite's eyes, and to Miharu's surprise, he was smiling as well.

It was unavoidable.

Rearing their heads back, it came forth, like a symphony that had been playing just for them, their own tune to show the world that they belonged right where they were. They laughed.

How long had it been, Miharu wondered, since he had truly laughed this way? The only thought that overcame this one was his curiosity whether or not this had been the first time any had been allowed to hear Yoite's beautiful voice in such a manner. This luck fell upon him.

He was blessed.

Without warning, he nudged his head slightly under Yoite's chin as the laughed, feeling tears prickling his eyes from the intensity of the situation, but not once did he allow any to fall. Yoite no longer tensed as he once did to the touch, instead, he found that he was leaning into it contently, closing his eyes so that his dark lashes cast shadows upon his cheeks.

Even as their sweet voices died down, their hearts continued to pound just as fast. The sky overhead was dimming beautifully, painting the sky with violet and rose and canary strewn about the clouds. Only the sound of the humming engine found their ears, and it was soothing to say the least.

Closing his eyes, Miharu sank into the warmth that was Yoite, treasuring the knowledge that their journey was not yet over.

He could feel his eyes growing heavy, threatening to fall shut, and it wasn't long before they did.

The world was falling quiet again.

* * *

_**Silence.**_

_**The sound of the engine had soon died out, and now there was nothing but the faint sound of breathing. The young wielder of the Shinrabanshou opened his eyes, understanding fully the reason.**_

_**The night sky shone beautifully from above as he sat there, knees drawn to his chest on the bench in which he sat. As he recalled the memory, he recalled too the feelings. Yoite was seated on the opposite side of the bench, head lowered as it often was. There were so many familiar things about this memory, and yet, since that time, there were so many things that had changed as well.**_

"_**It's better to become the ruler of Nabari and let me disappear with that power" The voice was almost silent, and yet, it pained Miharu's heart to realize that even then the boy's voice sounded more alive than it did now. Those words rang painfully in Miharu's ears.**_

_**The wind rustled about them, stirring the trees as well as their hearts.**_

'_**Yoite has always been in water deeper and darker than I thought. Perhaps at that time I was thinking of everyone, but now it's different. It's a feeling that I can't understand by myself. But I didn't want to be separated from Yoite.'**_

_**That was what he felt back then, sitting there in the silence of the night with the one he should have resented for dragging him further away from the calmness of the surface world. Even when he felt his life was threatened, not once did he truly fear Yoite. He couldn't. Those blue, broken eyes held so much of his own soul inside of them, that he was instantly drawn.**_

_**A moth to the flame, drawn until the final spark emits.  
**_

_**The scene around them changed, and no longer was he seated in the forest, but standing in an empty room, no trees in sight.**_

_**A gentle bluish green hue surrounded his vision, and in an instant, he felt his heartbeat increase. She stood ahead of him, observing him with questioning eyes. His own gaze stared back.**_

_**The woman that stood ahead was not the one he was familiar with. This was not Yousei-san at all.**_

_**Asahi.**_

_**It nearly startled him, the way her eyes seemed to peer directly into his soul. Seeing her was like looking into a mirror to his past. As his heartbeat skipped, he noticed too that he was not alone where he sat. Eyes trailing beside him, he spotted the sleeping form of his companion, curled up sweetly beside him.**_

_**Yoite looked so peaceful here...Could reality be just as kind?**_

"_**Miharu," His mother's voice pulled his attention away from Yoite's form, and it was just then that he even registered that she had begun forth, and was now standing only a foot or two away from him. How fast could his heart pound, he wondered, before he would grow faint?**_

"_**I'm so proud of you." she spoke in a gentle tone, her gaze loving and kind down upon him. A hand outstretched, urging the young boy to stand, and it only took one nudge before he easily did so. He took the moment to observe her, taking in the form of the mother he never knew.**_

_**Looking into her eyes, he nodded softly in understanding. "I don't want to erase him." The words were simple, yet held so much meaning. Would Yoite hate him, he wondered, if he continued to speak these words? It was several seconds before the woman gave any form of reaction, but when she did so, Miharu felt his pulse leap. She smiled sweetly and understandingly down at him, reaching a hand to stop just short of cupping his cheek.**_

"_**I know." She said simply, "I know."**_

_**Miharu nodded once before turning back to where Yoite rested. The sight was comforting, and as he leaned down to touch the boy's shoulder lightly, Asahi's voice caught his attention once more.**_

"_**Don't let the power control you, Miharu...and don't let anyone's word overpower what you know is right. Do what you feel is the best thing. Don't ever ignore your heart."**_

_**It was the most important piece of advice that any could give him, past, present, and future. He held it close, eyes fluttering shut as his palm cupped Yoite's cheek fully, feeling the warmth there. He knew what to do. When you love someone, you have to do what will make them happiest and what would be best for them. Love is not meant to be selfish. He understood this now.**_

"_**I know."**_

* * *

There was the sensation of a gentle touch to his shoulder, a soft prodding that was so familiar, it called him from his slumber. No longer was Asahi present, and he found himself back in the world of reality, having fallen asleep against Yoite's chest.

"Miharu?"

Opening his eyes to look up at the other warmly, Miharu woke at the sound of his name rolling off of Yoite's tongue. It was dark outside now, and he could tell that the truck had come to a stop. Giving his eyes a moment to focus, to realized as well that they had reached their destination. The sound of the train was close by, signaling that they had little time to board and seat, and still, Miharu found it nearly impossible to look away from the alluring blue that held his gaze.

It was in those eyes that he found his happiness.

Another whistle erupted from the station, and as Yoite moved to slide off of the truck, Miharu followed like a lost puppy, dazed even as his shoes met with the ground beneath with a soft sound.

"Well boys, here's your stop." The kind driver leaned out of her window in order to speak to the two, her smile as friendly as ever. "Is there anything else you two need?"

"No, thank you for the ride though." Miharu smiled in response, taking a step back to stand beside Yoite.

Yoite looked down at the other with calm eyes, then briefly to the vehicle that was beginning down the road again. The whistle gave another warning, and the two turned as if finally registering the sound.

Exchanging one more brief glance, the two hurried off toward the station, knowing that if they missed the train, it would be a long time before they would be able to catch the next. Their steps echoed loudly, and even though he held that knowledge, knowing that they could just have easily been set back by missing the train, Miharu was still in such a dazed state, that he found it difficult to bother him. There was a possibility that Yoite noticed his condition, considering the older male was practically dragging him along. Everything was blurry, swift and strange, a cloud covered Miharu's very thoughts as he watched the other. Why was everything so clear to him now? Had things really changed so much, that they effected him so?

It wasn't until he was set down in his seat that he even registered that they were on board, seemingly the only two in their car.

Brushing his fingers over the paper he'd just realized was in his hand, Miharu's eyes fell to his ticket, gazing at it just briefly.

A soft hand faintly touched his own from where it rest in the seat, and Yoite's voice spoke up to his surprise, calmly, sweetly, and almost alluringly so.

"Sounds are getting muffled, and it feels like I'm in the dark."

Miharu lifted his head to watch the other, shuddering as he realized he was being watched in turn. There was a tender smile upon Yoite's lips as he spoke. Something had changed inside of him as well, Miharu realized.

"Even you look blurry. But I wonder why...your presence next to me is stronger now than when I had my full senses."

Miharu's eyes widened slightly at the words, feeling his cheeks heat up considerably. Since when had the other been a charmer, he wondered. Whether Yoite had purposefully meant to startle him so wondrously or not, it had worked.

The intensity of the blush made him look down again, glancing at where their hands lay together entwined now. He was unable to hide the soft smile that found his lips again.

"It's like we're in a dream."

Their journey was at rest once more, and outside into the night, they could have both sworn that the very spirits themselves were watching over them. The wind danced gracefully as the train sped off into the distance, gentle steps with each breeze like a crane in the skies. Spirits, Gods, Demons, whatever creatures lurked about, all they could feel was one another's presence, and that was all that they craved.

Such a precious moment could not be hindered.

'A dream that I can live in forever with you.'


	8. Chapter 8: All Falls Down

**A chapter shorter perhaps then I would have originally liked, but here it is, nonetheless . Let me know your thoughts and concerns! Enjoy!**

**

* * *

**

"Where's Yoite." The question was stern, holding a demand and yet, present too was a hint of unease. Yukimi gazed intently at the samurai before him, awaiting an answer suitable, hoping it was the one he wanted to hear.

Finally turning to him, Raikou answered. "Our members are out searching for him. Yoite rebelled against the leader, abducted Rokujou Miharu and fled. Ichiki-san's unit, along with others, are currently tracking them."

"Tracking..."

"It's not 'capture' or 'protection'. He won't be given any mercy."

With that, he knew just what that meant. Yoite held no chance of survival. Yukimi stared quietly at the speaker. Though his expression was flawless, inside, his mind was knotted and mixed. Gau took a step forward then, and his own eyes fell now to his.

"Yukimi-san..." the name was spoken more as a question, if anything. "What do you want to do with Yoite-kun? Even giving false pretenses to the leader to research about him..."

It was an understandable curiosity, he supposed. Even Kazuho had questioned him before, even though deep down the woman knew the reason easy enough. Perhaps she'd wanted to hear the answer for herself, from his lips. Yukimi was strong, rare to let his own barrier be breeched, but to those who knew them, the barrier was invisible.

"There was a cat."

The boy in front of him seemed taken aback.

"...Cat?"

"A cat I owned became old and weak. I took really good care of it...I wanted to care for it until its' end, but it suddenly disappeared. I looked and looked...by the time I found it, it was..."

"Are you regretting not being able to be there for it?" Raikou shook him from his thoughts, expression almost emotionless to those around him. "Still, Yoite is not a cat.

No, Yoite wasn't a cat. He was a child who had been jerked hastily into the world of Nabari, used time and time again for other's gain. He was a boy who had been thrown away and trampled upon by anyone and everyone who ever claimed to care for him in any sense of the word, and he was the one Yukimi would defend with his own life. How could no one else see that?

"Ha...of course." he let out a low chuckle. Raikou seemed less than amused .

"...Sempai, you're just confused. Even if you have no intention of turning your back on Kairoushou...at the point where you protect Yoite, you will be considered a traitor. Either way, Yoite is..."

Yukimi's smile slid gradually from his face, just as Gau lowered his head to the words. They stung deeply for both, but in the end, what could anyone do?

"So come with us." The blonde gunner wanted to cringe at the smile that appeared upon the rosey-haired man's lips. "We are the ninjas that desire to change people...the world from the world of Nabari. We have a different path."

How could he wear that smile so easily, was a mystery to the other two, yet for several seconds neither chose to spoke. Silence seemed the best of choices right now, but regardless, it wasn't long before Yukimi stole the man's grin.

"So its' like having mercy in the face of your enemies. I haven no objections..." A hand lowered to the door handle of the car beside him, and without releasing the others from his gaze, those blue orbs pierced through, showing that he had no intent of leaving the matter alone. It was obvious where his loyalties lay, and in his mind, there was still a little cat needing to be found. "I have no objections...but i'm still confused."

No.

"I won't let you go!"

Gau saw it first-the way his partner's brows knitted, the way he stole forth. The scene unfolded before him in a blur, and just like that, the group was further torn. He stared now, wide-eyed at the gun which rest directed at his face. His heard thundered and froze all at once as a light sweat overcame him.

"Sorry, Raikou..." The voice was low and gruff even with the regretful smirk and kind eyes that he wore. It was the only way he would be able to make the other man back off, he knew, even if under other circumstances he would never threaten the black-haired boy. As expected, the samurai was frozen to the spot, fear hinted in his eyes. 'Sorry, Gau...'

Everything was falling apart...

An opening-Raikou jerked, elbow meeting arm to knock away the aim just enough to allow the drawing of a sword. He stood defensively in front of his young companion, eyes dangerous now upon the one once called a friend. "Gau, get back. "

"Raikou-san-" the name was uttered, his heart jolting at the harshness of the other's voice.

"Stay back!"

All that had been known was shattering, and fear set in, shaking to the core. He didn't want this. Why...

With an ever present smirk, the gun-wielder turned sharp for escape, followed easily enough by the one who now bore hatred in his gaze, deaf to the pleading of the one who owned his heart.

'Why...?'

From the distance a roar of thunder shook the sky and just one cry could be heard:

"Kairoushou Executive Branch group leader Yukimi Kazuhiko-I swear on my sword that I will destroy you!"

* * *

The sun had risen finally, breaking the barrier of the night as the creatures of the outside world sang their contentment for the new day. To the relief of the young travelers, the sky seemed to smile finally upon them from above, opening its' warm arms to embrace them in it's heat. The station hadn't been far off, but regardless this fact, the friends still had to take utmost care in remaining hidden to prying eyes. Miharu glanced about the area every once in a while as if expecting something, anything to happen. If they were being followed, he knew the other boy was in no condition to defend himself any longer. He would have to step up in the fight.

Glancing sideways at Yoite, he took the moment to look him over. As usual, the majority of his skin with the exception of his face was covered, tightly clothed and bundled protectively. The young ruler was torn...torn between feeling content at the knowledge that Yoite seemed all around more relaxed, and knowing that he held little to no time.

Yoite paused in his step then, shoulders hunching and palm resting flat against his thigh with a soft an uneasy breath leaving his lips. Those green eyes knew the reason.

Stepping forward, Miharu touched the other's shoulders gently for a moment, grateful that a pair of hands reached for him as well, and shifted to slide an arm about his waist, taking Yoite's own around his shoulder to assist him. "We have to be careful..." the words were quiet, though loud enough to be heard. "Those people...they're already in Banten."

Pushing forward, weak legs took cautious steps, bending only as much as needed, stepping down only as much as allowed up the stairway. "I'm sorry i'm so heavy, Miharu..."

"No, it's fine..."

Several minutes passed between them in silence. The way the sixteen-year-old stumbled ever faintly with each step...the way his breathing was barely present yet harsh all at once...it terrified him. Miharu couldn't bring himself to make eye contact as if worried what his own eyes would show. He was scared. Scared of thinking that soon, very soon, he would be left alone without the one he'd so willingly given everything to.

A soft voice broke him from his daze.

"Aren't you...happy?"

'Happy...? Happy that you'll disappear?'

"About what?"

Blue orbs shifted just enough to watch him. "There are no shards of kira in you, or even the three in Banten."

Silence fell again. The conversation had reappeared, and he had a sinking feeling he knew why. Was it possible that the other could feel how close he was as well? Just how much time remained, he wondered.

"...yeah. I'm happy."

"But you're not showing it."

What could he say now? What would be 'appropriate'? After everything that had transpired between them, how far was he allowed to push it? It was true, things had changed, but in the end, Yoite would always be Yoite. Just how much urging was too much? That desperate need to speak had tightened in his throat. It was almost unbearable, tearing at every shred of comfort he held, if any even still remained. It grew like a bubble within his heart, pushing, pushing, pressing against his ribs so harshly that he was certain he would explode. He couldn't bear it.

"Hey.." His voice quivered uneasily, "The promise...you haven't forgotten it, have you? That you'll make me king of Nabari. And that you won't die until then."

Yoite didn't speak. As expected, his gaze fell as the breeze picked up, whirring dangerously about them. Suddenly that comforting warmth was gone.

He felt that he should cry..give in. Lowering his own head a bit in turn, Miharu felt the stinging behind his eyes even with every effort to force it back. He was breaking. "I want to rest a bit..." came the mutter, refusing to glance in the shinigami's direction. "But it seems like we can't go to my house. Anyway, let's look for a way to communicate with the fairy again. There might be something left in Kumohira-sensei's house."

It was then that he felt those eyes upon him again.

"Of course, we'll try not to be found by Hanabusa-san. I feel guilty...but this makes you feel like a ninja, doesn't it?" It was a light tease perhaps, but he expected no laughter. Halting abruptly, he pulled back a bit at the figure before them. Hana, the one mentioned not two seconds prior was there. While she didn't spot the two, the young boy still felt his heart sink sickly in his chest. True, he felt bad about sneaking around her. It would have been nice to be able to visit, as well. Just as Yukimi felt to be a father figure in a way, this kind woman held the presence of a mother for both boys, calming them when nothing and no one else could. He hated this small betrayal, knowing his partner did as well.

They waited before approaching the property for her to wander out of sight. Good timing, perhaps.

Miharu held onto him tighter, turning to push through the space to the back of the house, still slightly paranoid in being caught, even though deep down he knew no one was present...or rather, that was his hope. Turning to touch Yoite's hand gently as if to ask him to wait, he moved forward quietly, only to pause in his step upon realizing the other chose to follow anyway.

"Miharu..."

"No, stay here and hide. Leave it to me." he pleaded, stepping closer once more to the other with a gentle smile.

"But-"

Miharu felt his smile widen more. The expression the other wore was...sweet, to say the least. It was pleading in itself, reaching for him in a way that made his very heart melt upon contact with those eyes. A natural act now, his hands lifted to brush his fingers tenderly upon those light cheeks as if to soothe away the boy's panic. "Wait for me, Yoite. I'll be back soon."

For a moment it was simple enough to forget their surroundings. Worried eyes relaxed once more to the familiar contact, until they shifted with shock, just as Miharu's had upon the sudden voice accompanied by a person no more than two or more feet behind the shorter of the two.

Hanabusa...

"Come in through the front door, okay...?" she asked, almost teasingly so.

Both stared wide-eyed now as if they'd seen a sea creature with fifteen heads rather than a woman staring at them. Though the wind whistled the area, it was unheard as their startled expressions remained. Surely, the faces they wore must have been humorous, to say the least. Gaping mouths, eyes wide as saucers, both still as stone statues. Further evidence was heard in the way Hana's head tossed back to let out a hearted laugh to the sky, her hands slapping down to rest upon her hips in a way that made her resemble an amazon chuckling at her prey.

"You shouldn't underestimate my 'sense', Miharu-kun!" she chimed happily, though before her arms could wrap around the two the way she moved to do so, they turned sharply as if to run.

"You-You have the wrong people!" They gasped out, only to be snagged by the shoulder each and held close. Hanabusa laughed, quirking a brow at the boys with a shake of head.

"Wait, what? Is that a fad among young people these days? Come on, come over here..."

"N...no, we can't-" Yoite began first, only to be interrupted by her insistent tugging.

"Yes, you can."

Within seconds, she'd had them pressed close, each having lost balance and fallen to their knees before her. Although the motherly face brought a sense of hope, the knowledge that contact could bring her potential danger was enough to scare them off. Or rather, try.

"No, we can't..." It was Miharu's turn to attempt, "You shouldn't get involved with us."

"Please."

This one simple word seemed to render all silent for a time. Truly, neither wanted to struggle. For what felt like forever, they were running. Running from ones they once called their friends. Lives were at stake, as was time, and maybe, just maybe this could be their chance to relax for once.

"No matter what your circumstances, i'll always welcome you."

"But..."The tears threatened to fall again..."But we only met you once..."

"Time doesn't matter. Anyone who drinks tea from my house is a special person to me."

Time, an endless monster that destroyed all in its' wake. 'Time doesn't matter'...it was all they needed to hear. They gave in, melted into those protective arms. the arms of their mother.

"Welcome home, Miharu-kun, Yoite-kun. Come, let's get inside where it's warm, hm?"

Home. It was a place unknown to both, and yet a place each longed for. In those final days, the only thing that was certain, was that it was here. This was their home.

* * *

**The group once seen as companions is crumbling beneath the desire for power, and old friends are turned to enemies, hearts twisted and mangled.**

**Perhaps Miharu and Yoite will get their moment to rest, or perhaps darker forces are at work. Only time could tell. **


	9. Chapter 9

**Bright, overwhelmingly bright...everything was so bright. There were so many beautiful things here, couldn't they see? The birds that sung each morning for the day, the moon that spoke gentle whispers to the night winds...Smiling faces, the laughter of a child in the distance...To look upon the world with blindness truly was sadenning, and yet, it was alright. It was alright because he could still see what truth lay within the earth.**

**An unfading smile was painted across gentle, delicate features of the child who gazed thoughtfully toward the sky with bright blue. He was happy. He had no reason to be, other than that very fact itself...**

**To be...**

**He was alive to witness the wonders of the world, even if he had to do so behind bars the majority of the time.**

**It was alright that he wasn't like everyone else, wasn't it? What harm did it bring? People could look at him without truly seeing, and it wouldn't bother him one bit. Girl, boy, even the few comments he'd heard whispered about not knowing was okay. He knew who he was, so...wasn't that enough?**

**It had become simple enough to escape when he felt like admiring something other than the stacks of books which kept him company. True, reading had been a pleasure to him, but true also was the fact that he was a quick learner. The correct amount of pressure applied to the correct area, and the bars would lift. It was easy math. Sora understood the dangers of longing for something outside of those bars, but who could it hurt, really? It was just for a moment, after all.**

**The breeze purred sweetly against his cheeks in a way that it felt almost like it was sighing in relief to his presence. Soothing, peaceful, beautiful...**

**A sound nearby startled him briefly, calling for his gaze. A clack of metal against...he couldn't tell. His curiosity was nudged in a way he couldn't ignore. There was so much exploring to do without nearly enough time in the world to do so.**

**Stepping carefully with bare feet, curious eyes gazed around the building corner to the sight. It was his brother, Tsukasa, simply playing in the yard. An interesting child to say the least. In truth, Sora knew little about him, only enough to pick him from a large crowd. Another loud sound, and he understood the cause.**

**Tsukasa wore the usual uniform proudly, his passionate eyes set on the ball before him as his fingers clasped the bat tightly, tight enough that onlookers would think him to be strangling the poor thing.**

**Sora couldn't help but smile to the sight. He remained for a time unnoticed, just how he chose to be at that moment. Tsukasa had his eyes...or did he have Tsukasa's? Subtle cheekbones...gentle brows...perhaps one of the only differences at all was the shortened hair and sharper chin. The smile spread like a wildfire. He couldn't help it, really, seeing that perhaps there was a place he belonged. The evidence was right before him, wasn't it?**

**Kthunk-**

**Features dropping from the sound of the door sliding open, the child let out a gasp of shock only to stumble backward and lose his footing. A hand clapped over his mouth to silence it, eyes wide now when his free palm met the ground to catch himself in a way. They had seen him, he'd messed up...Perhaps it wasn't too late.**

**Turning on hands and knees, he scrambled forward toward the gated window, small hand reaching until slender fingers wrapped about one of the bars to tug himself forward, sliding down with a soft sound as his feet made contact with the chill tile of the floor. Without so much as a breath, he snatched what held the barrier up to fling it away, erasing any evidence that he had left his confines.**

**Silence...**

**The air was thick and muddled with silence and fear, discomfort taking over whatever happiness that was felt just moments before. It was unfortunate that he had to feel such fear toward the people who were supposed to show him love.**

**'It's alright...' he inwardly spoke. Heart thrumming at dangerous speeds, his knees buckled as he slid to the floor, clasping both hands over it as if he were wanting to be positive the organ wouldn't take a flying leap. Raven lashes fluttered to a close, tickling his cheeks. 'It will be alright...you've been caught before...you know that punishment, and you lived through it...so things will be okay.' he continued to mentally assure himself. A part of him was merely begging his own assurance to be correct.**

**Seconds turned to minutes. Minutes to what felt like hours. Only when no commotion was heard did the boy allow his eyes to slide open once more, unaware of the liquid that stained them without having fallen. He was still safe.**

**Rather than situate himself or stand once more, Sora did the opposite and fell fully to the floor now, cheek pressing to it in a strange sort of comfort. Though grateful for the detour of danger, that raging mind was still in turmoil...**

**It felt like he was looking into a mirror, staring at himself the way he was meant to be. Tsukasa was his brother, and truly, they could have passed as twins. What separated one from right and the other from wrong though?**

**Tsukasa played ball...Sora read books...**

**Tsukasa laughed with the other children...Sora smiled with the company of the sky...**

**Tsukasa was a little boy...Sora was...wasn't he?**

**Tsukasa was happy...Sora...**

**Every thought and emotion hit him from every side, entrapping him and rendering him useless to do anything but ponder. Emotions are what humans felt. He felt fear, sorrow, happiness, regret and so much more. He was a human. But what stopped him from being like his brother?**

**Sighing out softly, the child drifted away, blue lost in a fog of a dream.**

**

* * *

**

**"Sora-kun?"**

**Glancing up from his paper to the welcoming voice, the child could only blink. Reaction had left him, rendering him confused at the appropriate response. There before him on the free side of the bars, stood the creature he'd been so fascinated with the day before. Feeling the heart in his chest clench and leap at once, if that were possible, he was sure it would become a numb sensation soon enough. Technically speaking, he had been told never to speak to his sibling...were the words still in effect if he wasn't the one to approach first?**

**"Um..." Tsukasa once more started to speak, brow quirked ever so slightly. It seemed he too was uneducated in what to say or do. "Sorry...Did I stop you from what you were doing?"**

**Sora shook his head. In a way, he resembled a deer in the headlights, eying the other as if he were a truck racing down the road to pummel him into the very earth. **

**"I...About yesterday, I mean." Though his intentions were noticeably well, it was obvious the other was nervous in his speech. It brought a smile to Sora's lips...**

**"I didn't mean to spy." Came the small-voiced response. His hand began to move once more, dancing across the paper as if the equation he wrote were an art form rather than math. "I'm sorry."**

**Tsukasa blinked, watching his sibling still before relaxing a bit. Since he could remember, his family acted like Sora was some sort of monster...an evil being meant to never see the eyes of man. This was the longest the two had interacted in a long time, the other times only being when he were younger. He couldn't deny that a large part of him was expecting something other than the smiling, sweet face before him. "Actually, I was wondering...did you want to..." **

**The smile widened, though the child chose not to look. Of all the members of their family, Tsukasa seemed to be the only one who had a heart at all, or maybe he didn't know? Sora didn't know, really. He'd never had the chance to ask. If he didn't know, then maybe it was for the best after all.**

**"Sora...?" the voice called quietly to him, causing his smile to waver ever faintly. **

**"'Sora' was the name my mother was thinking of giving me if I had been a girl. So i'm not Sora." **

**The words confused the other in the slightest, regardless the peaking of interest. "What do you mean?"**

**"..." The pencil came to a halt. Exhaling softly through rosy lips, those blue eyes turned only then as the slender figure pushed himself into a stand and approached with caution, resting a cheek against the bar as he watched his brother. Lifting his small hands, palms met with the usual bars, frail fingers curling about them as if to hold balance. " Sora isn't me...Sora was never here. So i'm not Sora."**

**'But i'm here aren't I? Aren't I...?' **

**Those bright eyes gazed to the other boy. Blue called out, begging for reassurance. "So then, who am I? Am 'I' alive?"**

**Tsukasa was drawn into the endless depths of cerulean. This poor creature, a delicate angel tossed away...**

**"Hey..." He began, kneeling a bit to eye level. "They'll be out for a bit they said...do you want to come play?"**

**His heart sped, pulse beating viciously. Happiness...was this true happiness? He had been happy, so then, why wouldn't his blood calm now? Sora tore his eyes away finally to turn, reaching for the usual wedge beneath the bars without a word, trying his hardest to refrain from grinning. Stepping up carefully, he pulled himself up, scooting out easily enough. After all, it was far from the first time he'd slipped out for a moment's breath. Dusting his pants, the siblings' eyes met again. Neither spoke for a couple of seconds until Tsukasa pointed his finger. **

**"Wouldn't it be better to put your shoes on?" **

**"I don't have any." **

**Blinking, those thin brows furrowed slightly. "Oh...Okay. Well, let's go over here. There's more room if we wanted to catch a bit. Is that okay?"**

**Sora nodded and followed easily enough, grateful to the sensation of grass beneath his skin once more. The most soothing sensation the world had to provide. **

**Their yard wasn't particularly large, but not too small to move about in. It was lined with several pots, empty though they were the type bought for plants and life. The grass was a paler shade of green, just as the fallen leaves. It was Autumn, and it showed in everything surrounding the young boys.**

**Gasping out, hands lifted to catch the glove that was thrown in his direction. While he'd never played any sort of sports himself, he wasn't naive to be confused at this, sliding the item over his left hand. **

**Tsukasa did the same on his right, making the first toss not but a second or so afterward. It was the first time either had a brother. **

**"You know...I'm not sure if this will help, but...when you think about it, people, animals...they breathe...they feel...they bleed...Some creatures who aren't discovered yet don't even have names. They're still alive though." The words were comforting in a sort, and yet...**

**'But is that alright?' Sora asked himself, careful to toss the baseball back for the other. He'd never done so before, but he wasn't bad. 'Is it alright just to exist?'**

**"I'm not saying I know much about it, but in the end, I don't know...Isn't Sora just Sora?"**

**'Sora...'**

_**"Tsukasa!" **_

**The voice was harsh, deadly as a serpent who prepared to strike...and to his dismay, that sickening sensation returned as they, 'those' people stood before them both. He really had messed up this time. **

**Tsukasa stared wide-eyed at the woman as his wrist was pulled harsh and almost violently, ball dropping with a small sound onto the gravel and weeds below. His eyes shifted over his shoulder to meet the lost ones of the other, yet the expression was unreadable to its' intention as the cruel tone of the woman continued. "Don't interact with that child! That's a ghost, and if you interact with it again, I'll make sure you never existed too!" **

**'Goodbye, brother...thank you.'**

**"This is the last straw." The man's voice chimed in his ears, ringing like a gong warning of impending doom. "The last time. Get in here and out of sight before someone sees you."**

**'I know, father...i'm sorry. I've disappointed you again, haven't I?' **

**"You've polluted this family enough!" That harsh hand groped out for him, wrapping around his upper arm and squeezing, digging into the already tender flesh of perhaps a past bruise left by the same touch.**

**'It's okay...you can hate me...I understand. Hate me if you have to, if it will make things better...'**

**"Disgusting little bitch..." **

**'Can't you just tell me? Say it once...say my name once...am I Sora? For once can't I be your child?'**

**Stumbling forward, the child barely caught himself on both feet, eyes wide and staring emotionless to the surrounding people. His 'family' who had him backed into a corner like some sort of awaiting meal. **

**"We're through with you."**

**'I'm sorry...'**

**A startled cry was torn from those often quiet lips when the sting of nailed fingers tore into his cheek in a slap, returning only to grasp into his black tresses so harshly that it felt like the strands would be torn. What was that? From the corner of his eye, something glinted in the light, and for a second it distracted him from the pain radiating in his head. Then he saw it...**

**Blade...knife...sharp, cutting...why...?**

**His eyes widened more, hands lifting instantly to cover his face when the foul woman took up the object and pushed forward to press her weight upon him to keep him still.**

**'I'm sorry...!'**

**His flesh ripped open upon contact, and suddenly, the previous stinging of fingers didn't feel so bad. It slid across his neck, a mix of shallow and deep, and he felt the warm heated liquid heavy there as his gaze blurred before him. He was going to die.**

**"Tsukasa." he heard barely over the ringing in his ears. Tsukasa...was he there? "You do it too."**

**Yes. He was in front of him...he was holding it now...but his eyes held something else. Fear? Sadness? Guilt? His own vision was too dark to see. Would Tsukasa help him? Or...**

**His brother stared at him, a tremble having overcome his every nerve. "I..." the voice cracked and wavered. He couldn't. The knife fell from his hands, although blood was present there from the blade. **

**Sora's blood, the blood that spilled heavily from his neck to stain his hands that tried desperately to hold it in. It was his lifesource, all that was keeping him from a corpse and he knew that at any time his body could give in. Even as he pushed himself up and ran, he was numb. **

**Running...Running...an endless street of wandering people who walked on blindly. **

**Why was no one helping him? What had he done that was so awful, that he deserved this? **

**Shinigami. **

**Murderer.**

**It was all coming back.**

**Sora was dead, or rather, never existed at all. Only this angel of death and despair.**

**When had he fallen? Was he already gone? He could see figures, blurs surrounding him, coming closer...closer...**

**Closer...**

"Don't kill me!" Yoite cried out, fingers instantly slapping to his neck as if to hold it together. "Stop it..." his hands slid higher to cover his face as he drew his knees to his chest from where he now sat, a quivering mess of terror.

"Yoite." The voice was familiar, calling gently and lovingly for him to come back from his nightmare.

A nightmare. That was right. Those past events were long gone. He was here, with Miharu beside him under the protective roof of Hanabusa. Those shaky arms lowered slightly as the woman raced in, kneeling without question to reach out for him.

"You were dreaming...it's okay-"

"**Don't...**touch me." his voice was hoarse, strained as if something was pressing to his throat to constrict it.

Regardless the request, Hana held something to him, urging him gently to take the small gift. "Here, have some cocoa. Everything's alright."

He felt like crying...

The dream had been so vivid, haunting him to the depths of his soul. He was a monster...he caused his mother to die...his father and his wife to resent him...his brother, perhaps the only one he could honestly say he loved, to be afraid. Time and time again, he'd put Miharu in danger, and here he was, doing the same to this kind woman who spoke to him like a mother would. Was Yukimi in trouble because of him too?

He held the heated liquid in his hands close to his chest, taking in a shuddery breath to allow the scent to float in. There were so many times in the past he felt comforted by the man, even in the smallest of ways. A blanket draped over his shoulders when he felt a fever coming on...a hot drink to soothe his aching head...but this...It was different. This was different. Yukimi wasn't here. Maybe he was even dead by now, he didn't know.

"...u...Yukimi..." Blackened bangs covered his face as his head lowered. "Yukimi..."

Hana's expression was of confusion, even though Miharu understood.

"That ninja that came to this house before..."

"Oh, that man." Her face lit up just enough to be noticed. "Do you want to see him? Shall we call him?"

"N-No..." Yoite knew he was out of time. There was no point to cause the man further difficulty. It was all over soon.

"I'm sure he's worried about you.

"He's not..."

"Why not?"

'Because...because I don't want him to be. No one will even remember my name soon enough.' "It would be better for him if I didn't exist..."

A smile touched the corners of Hana's lips then, even though he wasn't watching her. He could hear it in the way she spoke to him. She urged without being pushy. "Why do you say that? I don't think we should suppress your wanting to see him."

Yukimi was one of the first people he'd met aside from Hattori. While his senses were failing, his memory still ran strong. The first time he'd seen the gunner, he felt nothing, held no hope but the one. He was still quite small, regardless his age. The kira he'd been trying so hard to learn was the reason for that. Not long after arriving to that place, he gone through a growth spurt as his body began to kick in naturally, trying its' hardest to catch up to his age. He saw the look of fear and possibly even disgust the man held upon seeing him in that state. His bones had altered, twisted, and his screams hadn't stopped for three days. His skin had torn at times, but rather than running away, Yukimi checked in on occasion with bandages and water. Time and time again he would take time out of his own day to help this child he knew nothing about. Never did he leave him. Never did he ask questions. He was just there, offering a roof and a friendly hand.

But...

"But I can't give him anything in return. I ignored Tsukasa's kindness...I can't do anything to make Yukimi happy...and i'm just clinging to Miharu. I couldn't even bring the muffler you knit, Hanabusa-san..."

Yoite kept his head low as he spoke, too much guilt written across his face to bring himself to look at either of the other two, before hearing a sound that would lift his spirits, even in the slightest.

"You were wearing the muffler? I'm so happy!" She truly was an angel in a time of darkness. "I'll start knitting a matching one for Miharu right away! It's been getting chilly lately, so I'll try to finish it quickly."

Miharu smiled silently to himself, taking notice of the change in Yoite's expression. They were both there. Wouldn't that be enough?

The kira-user found a hand then upon his cheek, but rather then jerk away, he merely stared into the eyes of the woman who held him close with that welcoming smile of hers.

"Everyone isn't concerning themselves with you because they want something in return. They stay by your side because they like you."

'Only because they're naive...they don't know anything.'

"But that's weird..." Finally he was relaxed fully. The normally calm tone had returned as well. "I don't even think of myself as alive or dead. There aren't people who want to concern themselves with others without wanting something in return."

'Even you...Mi-'

"Okay, okay, don't get so depressed!" Hana's voice broke his concentration once more. "Are you okay with just paying attention to what others say and letting them decide what your heart wants? Don't belittle yourself. You might be 'alive' and you might be 'dead', but you decide on your own about what you are."

**_"I'm not saying I know much about it, but in the end, I don't know...Isn't Sora just Sora?"_**

'That's right...Tsukasa.'

"You're allowed to decide."

They were here. They were here all along, just for him. "I am...?" he spoke to himself, feeling Miharu's expectant green eyes on him. They were here helping him stand the entire way. But didn't the understand by now, that was why he couldn't bring himself to burden them?

"It doesn't matter. I'm fine..." Miharu's hand stopped short from where it had lifted to wrap about the other. "...with bringing Miharu back to Banten, I..."

That was it. The final snap.

The younger boy pulled away from him, teeth gritted and brows furrowed uncharacteristically before him. He felt his own heart sink. It was too far.

"Don't say it like that." Miharu's voice quivered, stinging his ears and chest in unison.

"Miharu-"

Then he was gone. He ran away. Ran from him.

"Miharu-kun!" Hana's voice called in turn, though the sound was lost to him.

Miharu was leaving him.

He was alone after all.

'I'm sorry.'


	10. Chapter 10: How Long is Goodbye?

**I wanted to take a moment to get this out. The other day, I was browsing about a Nabari no Ou forum, and I ran into a rather...interesting topic someone had posted. Now, normally i'm all for everyone stating their own opinions and whatnot...however, this particular topic bothered me greatly. **

**This person wrote for nearly a page, stating how Kamatani was 'sick'for making Yoite the way he was. They claimed that that was the reason she ended the character, because he was 'vile' and 'disgusting' and 'not really a male character', because being intersex isn't 'natural' and people like that 'aren't meant to exist'. **

**Perhaps i'm getting too personal on the subject, but truly, it saddens me that so many people have thoughts such as these. Everyone is born uniquely. Cherish that thought. If we were all created the same, then would we really be 'alive'? **

**Anyway...that was just a thought. I wanted to thank you all who have supported me through this story, and your reviews and critiques are greatly appreciated.**

**While it may seem so, this is not the final chapter. There will still be a few, so that you're all aware. I've been plotting on how to continue after a certain scene, after all. Some of you may love the course I take, some may hate it...-weary look- I suppose we'll know soon enough.  
**

**

* * *

**Tears threatened to fall in frustration, gripping him from inside and tearing at his tightening throat. Tracing a small finger along the rough skin of the scar across his left palm, he felt his heart sink in his chest to the realization. Scars, while leaving imprints, are only memories of past events. Erase that, and there is nothing...no reminder of what once was.

Yoite was going to disappear. That wasn't alright. That was one scar he never wished to part with.

'When you say it like that, it's almost like you're...'

His fingers curled inward over the palm and clenched his hand almost like he were trying to hold it in place.

**_"Do you want him to live?"_**

His heart jolted to the start, muscles tensing when he heard it. It was _her._

**_"Such confused children...both the other one, and you. It's easy...Just erase the truth that that child ever gained the Kira. Something of that scale should not have much consequence to you at this point." _**

'But...That's not what Yoite desires...'

**__****"So? Do it for what 'Miharu' desires. If both of you can gain happiness from it, how can it be wrong? You have the right to gain happiness."**

Her voice was cold upon his ear. Tempting, and more than ever he just wanted to listen to it.

'I don't want Yoite to die. If Yoite disappears, what would I do?'

**_"So desire it."_**

'I hate it. Who am I if I can't rely on Yoite?'

**_"Miharu..."_**

"I hate myself when i'm like this...I hate it!"

The sound of crunching snow tore his thoughts aside, but as he made to turn, it was too late.

A quick blow to the stomach, it's partner to the back of the head, and he lost it. Everything was gone...blackened.

* * *

**'Miharu...'**

**Who was it...? Yousei-san? No, it was too gentle...**

**'Miharu, wake up.'**

**His eyes opened, yet he still couldn't see. At any natural moment, the realization should have been terrible and frightful, but there was an overwhelming warmth here, kindness radiating from its' core. What was this place?**

**A fading light caught his eye just faintly, urging his curiosity enough for him to turn. Voices...he could hear voices from it. **

**Thobari...?**

**_"I told you...I want people who have the right qualities."_ the other spoke, though not directly to him. A hallway came into view, and he recognized it easily enough. His old school. ****_"In any case, you should undergo some training."_**** That's right...this was the first day. That fated day when the art awoke within him, changing his life forever. He watched the scene play out before his eyes-a memory forgotten by passing time. **

**The man leaned down to the past Miharu and spoke something too low to hear, though he could remember what the words were. 'You're being targeted.'**

**The scene faded gradually, and the room once more grew to black. He understood now. His memories...**

**_"Can I put the sauce in now?" _Kazuho...**

**The boy shifted as something new, something brighter was shown, and he couldn't help but to smile at this. He could see himself clearly, head low and cooking as the excited woman watched him while eagerly urging the bottle toward him. **

**_"This is amazing!" _Yukimi..._"Yoite, you think so too, right?" _**

**Yoite._  
_**

**There he was...plate held to his chest as usual, pausing before taking another bite of food. He was alright...he wasn't nearly as pale back then. Hair a tad shorter perhaps, standing tall, proud, instead of hunched and in pain. Yoite...the larger difference was there, in his eyes...that precious light was still dull.**

**Just as before, all faded back into nothingness, yet unlike before, he found himself stepping forward and reaching out as if to grasp some invisible rope. Why was he seeing this? He didn't want these memories. They only reminded him..**

**"Why are you doing this!" He cried out to the shadows.**

**_"Let's make it so that you were never here from the start." _What...? Whose voice was that? It was one he didn't recognize. Where was it coming from? He turned to find it, but nothing was there. **

**Miharu found himself walking, legs moving of their own accord as he strained his ears and eyes, trying to catch anything out of the ordinary to give him a clue. Then he heard...it was a small whimper of a sob, a gentle cry and a gasp. He paused in his step to listen more closely, partially grateful when the whimper repeated itself. Then, there before him lay something...a figure curled into itself, a hint of crimson surrounding it.**

**He didn't speak. Something inside of him told him to approach the form, and he listened to it eagerly, wanting to understand this. All of it. It was the form of a child...**

**The sight caused his chest to clench with discomfort, throat tighten to the extent that he felt as though he would suffocate. It was a pitiful vision...this small creature, gripping at the dripping wound around his neck as he fought to breathe. He shivered, trembled and whimpered, blackened bangs covering the face. Miharu bit his lip and knelt down to take up the boy carefully into his arms, one hand cradling him with gentleness, the other touching the ones over the throat tenderly. Surely it was too late for this poor creature. Everything was red, even where he sat. Too much was lost, and it made his heart ache with guilt that he'd found this far too late. **

**His hand slid higher to come into contact with that smooth, pale cheek that was painted with tears, then shifted higher to brush the bangs aside. **

**"...!" **

**Eyes widened and muscles tensed.**

**Lifeless blue eyes...**

**Familiar blue eyes...**

**Yoite's blue eyes.**

**He found his lips parting, mouth gaping open as he tried to speak yet finding no words. Those eyes watched him, peering so deeply that he had to look away. It was too much...**

**Suddenly the weight was lifted as the child disappeared. **

**"No.." he tried to hold on tighter. "No." he repeated, lurching forward until his palms and knees met harshly with the floor, drenching himself in the liquid that was left behind. "Come back! Bring him back!"**

**He'd never screamed do loudly in his life. It hurt. Everything hurt. He was burning from the inside in icy flames.**

**For several minutes he remained this way, a dry sob heaving from his lungs before he felt something. It was that warm sensation...**

**'Miharu.' He didn't look up. Didn't have to. He'd met this voice just a small handful of times, but it was just enough to know there was nothing to be frightened of.**

**Eyes sliding shut, he melted into the arms that encircled him there in the night, ear pressing to a thrumming heart. It was the heart of his mother.**

**'There, my boy...Do you understand? He's lived a life without really living, before he met you. Shunned by his parents, used without getting a say in anything...You know the reason, don't you?' She whispered the words, rocking him lightly. He felt like a child, clinging to the woman desperately as she rest her chin atop his head. **

**"It doesn't matter..." He answered, voice hoarse with emotion. "Why does it have to matter? Yoite is Yoite...Yoite has always been Yoite..."**

**'Sweet boy. Yoite exists only because he was forced to. The one you've met...the one you've come to love, is the one that rests deeper inside of him. Do you understand what i'm saying? You're out of time...you know what you have to do. I have faith you'll do the right thing that will make you both happiest.'**

**"I'm afraid...I don't want to lose him."**

**The loving fingertips of his mother brushed over his scalp, soothing him as best she could. His eyes had grown heavy, and a part of him just wanted to disappear as well. Yet...**

**'You know what you have to do, Miharu.'**

**She was gone. **

**

* * *

**"So you're finally awake?" Hattori smiled grimly down at him, shadowing him from what little light lit the room. His head pounded, and his stomach hurt, but regardless this fact, he tried to sit up best he could.

"Please..." Miharu bit out, situating himself to sit up correctly, trying his best to ignore the ache of his body. "Please, there is no time left. Please let me go to Yoite."

The elder man leaned back to his own seat, humor clearly gone from his face. After all, the last time they'd been in a room together, it caused the series of events that lead to him having to flee. Miharu found himself clenching his muscles, hands grasping the front of his sweater tightly as he watched the man. It was more than clear that he was less than pleased to see the young boy.

"The excursion is over. I thought I gave you two more than enough free time, but..."

"I promise I'll return to you. Please..."

"How many times do I have to tell you there is no reason to grant Yoite's wish? What is the reason you hold so much concern for him?"

Hattori's words tasted like vinegar, salt in an open wound.

'Because I...'

"Because me and Yoite...are the same."

Miharu's words seemed to catch him off guard for the moment and although he wasn't looking, he could feel that gaze upon him once more, as well as hear the halt of the pen he was using to write with.

"Do you know of his past?" he asked. Suddenly this felt like an interrogation of the heart.

"No." 'Not all of it anyway.' "But I-"

"What part of you and he are the same?"

What part...what part? He'd never taken the time to think it through. It wasn't something one could so easily state, after all. Somehow he just knew that deep down they shared the same ties, a red string bonding them together.

The man spoke up again as he set down what he'd been working on. "Sure, you have no parents and have the special circumstance of carrying the Shinrabansho. But then there were people who extended their hands to help you. People from Banten, Fuuma...Family, friends...You were always blessed with people's kindness. But that child was not the same. With an existence where even just 'living' was unpleasant, he desired the 'erasure of himself'. Perhaps because we were too kind, he rejected others and desired nothing. At the point beyond despair, while hiding his breath it was his first and last wish."

Miharu recalled the vision...the child who he held so dear to his heart, covered in blood and expressionless.

"He is truly diligent and smart. In just over a year, he had absorbed the information and skills he would need to become a ninja. At first glance, his effort contradicted his wish. For him, it must have simply been a crossing point. Alive but dead. Not alive but not dead. He put his life on the line the most because he believed that his existence was perpetually wavering like that of a ghost. If he didn't do that, the person who he thought he was would immediately vanish. That child was never apathetic toward himself. Unlike you."

'You may know more about him, but I know more inside of him then you ever could...' Miharu stood with a sudden movement, gazing down at the other with eyes that pleaded to be heard. "But I-"

"Are you saying that the two of you have a bond that surpasses those words and reasons? As an adult, I don't have the pleasure of seeing that new world. I won't deny you, but I think your power should be used for greater things. Counterfeits...You and Yoite are not the same at all."

"You're wrong..."

"Now if you'll excuse-"

**"You're wrong!"** He bit out this time. It was almost humorous, the expression on the elder man's face, and yet this was far from the time to be thrown into a fit of laughter. He couldn't understand. He wouldn't, and Miharu wasn't entirely convinced he wanted him to understand. A small hand reached for the door, but as it was slammed before he could grasp it, he felt every muscle in his body give in. He fell against the frame, trembling fingers flat against the surface now. This was all a waste of time.

Whether he granted Yoite's wish or not..he was more than useless if he remained stuck in this place.

'I made a promise...'

Back then, fear clouded his judgment. He called out the shots without ever having a choice. They met as enemies, but in reality, there never was friend and foe. Since the first moment their eyes met on the battle field, something had clicked, as if the events that were meant to take place were working at full speed for them both. Things were changing rapidly from the start.

'That day in the train car...that was when I first saw it. Although you knew I had no choice but to help you, when I spoke the words your eyes lit up for the first time. That was when I finally saw that there was an existence hidden there. You didn't smile with your lips..you didn't even smile with your eyes. But through your eyes, you smiled with your heart. You were excited when someone was willing to help you...Side with you...Not Kairoushou, but you.'

Lost in his thoughts, he slid to a seated position in the mid of the room.

'I knew nothing about you, and you didn't know me. We didn't even talk much back then. Somehow though,it felt like you were there all along.'

Voices could be heard from the other side of the door, down the hall a ways so that he couldn't tell the conversation. Surely, even if he'd been a foot from the people, he wouldn't have noticed their words. He was too far lost, drowning in his thoughts now. Perhaps his heart was panicking within...

That precious night flitted back into his mind just then. Yoite's eyes were on him, and his the same in return. He recalled the way the boy shivered to his kisses, and while there were times he had to slow himself to allow the other time, not once was he pushed away. No, quite the opposite. Yoite was reaching for him and him alone. They needed each other then physically, but the truth of the matter was, at the end of the day, they always needed one another mentally and emotionally. They were one another's life lines, their very air supply. He wished desperately that he could give the other more, but also a part of him understood that Yoite wasn't the type to just take. His actions weren't selfish. He was a giver, one who gave too much and expected too little. Regardless...Miharu wished to offer everything he could and more.

The racket outside grew louder. Footsteps echoed...Then, lifting his head to the sound of the door re-opening, he parted his lips to speak with a voice full of question. "Gau-san...?"

A familiar face not seen in what felt like years.

"Are you hurt anywhere?" The other boy asked, but his words seemed a blur. "It's alright. I'm on you and Yoite's side. It seems that Yoite-kun is heading this way-"

The magic word and he turned to look directly at him, brows knitting into an unreadable expression. "What?" What indeed...it wasn't too late. He was here. There was still time. Forest-green eyes fell once more to the scar across his palm, and without hesitation, he reached with both hands to make harsh contact to his own cheeks as if telling himself it was time to wake. "Yoite's in no condition to fight. We have to help him."

Another set of footsteps drew their attention back toward the doorway as a man, one not recognized made his way hurriedly toward them, arm outstretched and reaching for Miharu. "You," he motioned to Gau at first, "What are you doing here? You're in the way. Move!" Snagging Miharu harsh by the wrist, his free hand pushed firmly against Gau's chest to shove him away like some offensive being. "Leader wishes to store the Hijutsu in a safer location."

Gau gritted his teeth bitterly, trying his best to get back to him. "What do you mean 'store'? He's a human being! Please, stop, why don't you think about how** he** feels?" his hand took the stranger's shoulder and forced him to turn, his other reaching out for Miharu only to be knocked away.

"Stop barking, you brat!"

"Gau-san-" the younger struggled for freedom when Gau was knocked so simply aside. He didn't know how much more he could take...All time passing, he had to witness time and time again people being hurt because of him. It was enough...

"Damn it-" the man snapped as the boys squirmed and kicked, "Calm down! Someone capture the Hijutsu-" a sickening crack ended the words, and the next each knew, was that the assailant fell forward limp and lifeless to the floor.

A flash of pink and rose..

"R-Raikou-san-"

The samurai smiled to them. Their knight in shining armor.

"Are you two alright?"

"Raikou-san...why...?"

"The road with no retreat was forked, so I decided to follow this path. That is all." His smile faded just as quickly as it had been birthed. Celebration was put on hold, however. All knew there was no time for it.

They stepped forth, racing from the room and unsurprised by the group that had now clouded the hallway. There were too many, much more than their tiny group of three. Gau reached out for him to stop him, pleading softly to his companion and praying inwardly. "Raikou-san-"

The sword was drawn and glinted to the dimmed light of the surrounding space. "Even if this is a decision that goes against the way of the samurai, I will not regret it."

Miharu opened his mouth to speak, but when a nearby explosion startled him, he felt it.

It was there.

That sensation he'd come to love and depend on was there, coming for him, and without a doubt he knew he felt that presence. "Gau-san, Raikou-san, this way!" He tugged free from his friend's hold, not seeming to care what happened next. Let an army come to stop him, it didn't matter. Even his name being called from the others was inaudible.

'He is here..he came for me..i'm not too late..'

Back then, those eyes reminded him of the clouded depths of the ocean, lost to the light above...he refused to see them so blurred ever again...

'Even if I have to risk drowning myself...i'll throw everything aside to see you reach the light.'

His shoes hit the fallen snow when he bolted from the confines, heart pounding and soaring and gasping in delight to the vision that greeted him there.

He was there...

Those lips he loved so much were smiling to him, those arms outstretched and eyes dancing in happiness.

"Yoite!"

Long arms encircled him as his own wrapped tightly around the one he loved. He nuzzled his face into his chest, inhaled his scent as deep as his lungs could muster. 'I love you...' he screamed into his mind. 'so much...' They clung desperately to each other, basking in one anothers heat despite the chill of the falling snow.

He felt his own smile fall though as the reunion was short lived. Something was wrong...Something was horribly, horribly wrong. Yoite collapsed from beneath his own weight, resting now completely onto Miharu's small shoulders. He was disappearing...leg already broken down from the effects of the kira. Miharu thought back to his dream...that small, lifeless child drenched in red...he was too late to save him, but he wouldn't make that mistake again. He would be with him until the end this time.

"Come on, Yoite. We'll find somewhere warmer." he shifted carefully, pulling the other in a way that lay him partially against his back. It would be difficult, but then again, what part of this was ever easy? Yoite made no sound aside from his shaky breathing as the smaller of the two worked to pull them both. Luckily, while he was taller than his average age, Yoite weighed far less than the average.

Miharu held tightly to the other, shoes crunching down into the snow with difficulty. He would manage though...He refused not to. Even if this was the end, he refused to let it go this way...

His eyes snapped upward when two figures emerged from the fog. He recognized them easily enough as the ones they had run from in the past, but before he could make any move of defense, he was met by a fist, feeling Yoite's weight fall from him as those same fingers jerked him forward then by the collar. He glanced around blindly for his friend, fear painted in his every feature. He needed...

His attacker paused for the second, only to shove him aside without warning. What had happened? It was too fast to tell. A glimpse of blond, a knowing smirk and blue eyes he'd known all too well, accompanied by a simple "hey" of greeting...

Yukimi wrapped an arm tight around his waist, the other snagging the lifeless Yoite up in the same manner. Though the area was by literal terms, 'up in smoke' by the man's tricky work, Miharu could see all too clearly. Everything was coming together it seemed. At last...

It felt like they were always running. Never a moment to breathe.

"You guys..." Yukimi shook his head with an exasperated sigh when the pair was set down once they were certain danger was far enough behind. "What do you think I gave you cellphones for?" He muttered beneath his breath. Stepping away from the boys just long enough to peak around the corner from their hiding spot, he continued to mumble as if speaking partially to himself. "If I hadn't gotten in contact with Gau, I would've been lost right now!"

His griping was comforting in a way...causing Miharu's heart to feel like it was swelling too much it would burst.

After everything...they still had companions.

"Yukimi-san..."

"Any broken bones? Let me see..."

"I'm fine..." 'but...' "Yoite..."

A strong hand lifted to touch his brow, giving a light ruffle of the hair. Although this hand had done great damage to others in the past...it was gentle and warm. The hand of a father. This simple act alone brought a smile to Miharu's lips as Yukimi shifted to reach for something and moved to where Yoite was leaning against the nearest wall.

Yoite's dazed gaze dropped upon feeling something drape around his neck.

The muffler...

He was certain it had been destroyed before.

"Here." Yukimi smiled at him, "It's yours."

"Yukimi...I...Kairoushou...I'm sorry..."

The gunner didn't speak at first. He knew, just as Miharu knew what was happening. This was no time for apologies on anyone's behalf. "You should be. I've been continually thrown around by you." he teased gently, touching the sixteen-year-old's hand. "But hey, it's no big deal."

Pulling his hand away just enough, he gripped the man's shirt to pull him closer, leaning against him just enough so that he could hear his words. "Miharu...Protect him. I don't have the power to pull Miharu out of the water anymore."

Yukimi understood without having to be asked twice. It was alright now though. That silly cat he'd bonded to was right here all along. He made it in time. "Ha..." he smiled, gazing into mirroring blue eyes. "You're so troublesome."

Hellos and goodbyes...it's impossible to tell when a moment is the final you'll see of a loved one. The past and future blend so easily, its' difficult to tell when one ends and the other begins. In that moment, time itself ceased as fate watched from the front row, gazing upon the friends with expressionless eyes.

'Goodbye, kid.'

Yukimi turned sharply away. They'd been found.

"Go!" He called back to Miharu who had stumbled to his feet in poor attempt to help as the assailants drew their weapons and moved to pierce the companion.

"Yukimi-san-"

"I'm fine! You take Yoite and run!"

When was it going to end? His heart sped once more as he tugged Yoite closely once more, moving only as fast as two legs could carry him. All he could do was run away...he was useless to help again. Useless...but he knew also that Yoite was the important matter right now. Yukimi felt it as well. The hour glass was down to its' final grains of sand. It was the last time the gunner would see his truest companion.

Miharu couldn't tell how long he'd been walking, stumbling beneath the other boy's weight. Every sensation had iced over. He felt every emotion all at once to the point that he couldn't tell which one was real and which he'd imagined. Everything was a blur to him, and at that moment, all he knew was that he was losing what he desired most in his young life.

"Yoite..." He breathed out, leaning the deathly pale teenager against the nearest thing available, his own legs giving out from beneath him. "Yoite." He spoke the name more firmly. Still no answer. That light he loved so much was fading, and there was nothing he could do. "Yoite..." It was all he could do just not to sob in frustration. The words spilled out in a single breath. He didn't care anymore. Yoite had to know. It was only right, even if it was the last thing the boy would hear. "I don't want you to disappear. Stay alive. We could stay together forever, Yoite." Was that his voice? It sounded so desperate...it wasn't like him. "I'll use the Shinrabansho...

Yoite's eyes shifted away from him. That light...

"Even if i'm a ninja in the world of Nabari..." his voice was small...so small, and fragile...suddenly this once strong individual appeared to be made of glass. "I've killed so many people...that's why."

"Then i'll change that, even the past..."

"But you...don't desire that, do you? Even if you think about it, you don't desire it. Because, Miharu...You're kind..."

'I'm not kind...I'm selfish...I'm selfish because I need you in my life. Please don't make me let you go...'

"I will die soon."

'No, please...'

"But you have to live."

It was done. He couldn't protest. It's not what the other wanted. In the end, all he desired was to make him happy. That's all he wanted.

As the snow cried from above, silence overcame them, enveloping them in the frozen time. Yoite relaxed against the fence he'd been leaned against, chest raising and falling slow and gentle. No longer was he plagued by harsh coughs or violent chills...he was peaceful. Miharu did what he could to understand this. It was for the best wasn't it? He reminded himself inwardly, knowing deep down that it was all leading to this. He nudged his head beneath the other's chin for a moment, taking in his scent as if memorizing it for a final time.

"Thank you Miharu. For not asking anything about me, yet staying by my side. For looking at me, even when there was no reason to...for never letting go of my hand."

Leaning slowly away, Miharu gazed upon this angel with love and adoration. His heart ached...no, his everything ached. It hurt.

"So...If you are so sad cannot live, I want you to erase my existence. Right now, at this moment, I am happy with just the fact that you are thinking of me...Our promise...we can fulfill it completely."

He was smiling...truly smiling. Every word was honest and spoken from the core. He was happy...

Miharu could feel them there, tears welling in his eyes. Why did he have to say goodbye after finding the missing half of him? It wasn't fair...

"I want you to grant my wish. So you can smile and laugh in the future."

'I understand.' he spoke the words silently to himself.

The wind died down fully around them, though the snow continued to fall. It was impossible to say how much time passed, and yet, neither seemed to care. It was too precious to think of silly things such as time. Sometime during the moment, Miharu had shifted so that the other could rest against his chest, his own small hand having moved to lay across Yoite's heart. He felt it there, even from beneath the thick coat he wore. The thrumming against his palm was comforting and brought a soft smile to the corners of his mouth which only grew upon watching Yoite's hand lift to catch a falling snowflake.

"Miharu..." The older boy tilted his head to meet the other's gaze. "You okonomiyaki...they were warm and made me happy."

"Oh...? That's good...i'll make them again."

Yoite was happy...

"Yeah..."

That sweet beating beneath his hand was becoming softer...far too softly now to feel.

"Make them..."

A gentle breeze, a fading form, ashen skin from beneath layers was broken down as the heart took its' final beat.

Yoite was gone.

All was lost.

Miharu clung to the coat that still held the boy's scent, layering it lovingly in newly fallen tears. Closing his eyes, he allowed the sensations of power to overwhelm him, and he no longer cared that it felt as if he were going to explode from their intensity.

**'Yousei-san...' he whispered hoarsely to her, gazing expressionless in front of him from that inside world. The woman stood there before him, humor normally present no longer there. 'I need...'**

**'Tell me, Miharu. What exactly is it that you want? You want his happiness...do you think this will be what makes him happiest in the long run?'**

**He stay silent. He couldn't bring himself to speak, let along think at all. Lost...**

**'Miharu.' She spoke up again. This time the voice was closer, breath against the back of his neck. When had she moved?**

**'Erase...Yoite. Make it so that_ that_ Yoite was never created...'**

**She watched him doubtful at first, only to realize something later in the way he spoke. Only then did a slow and almost devious smile appear on her lips, and he head lowered as if to bow. 'Yes...'**

**The room was enveloped by an unbearable light. He couldn't see. Couldn't breath. Couldn't move. Altered time, space, knowledge he never knew could exist all whirring in his mind, sparking his memory and altering. Feelings he'd learned were torn from him, mixed, and soon he couldn't remember the reason for his tears.**

**Why was he crying? It felt like his head were going to break. His heart hurt and he knew not why. A scent lingered in the air, so familiar to him but so strange and new, and why was it so addictive? **

**_"I'll make you the king of Nabari."_**

**Who was that? **

**Wait, what did he just hear? Already he'd forgotten.**

**_"The unspeakable art. The Ki-"_**

**The what? Why was it all fading so quickly?**

**_"Yoi-"_  
**

**It grew and grew, that sickening sensation of falling, and the smile of the Shinrabansho was no longer noticed to him as black enveloped him. Everything was gone. **

The boy fell sideways into the fallen snow.

**

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**Well everyone, I can honestly say this is one of the most depressing things i've ever had to write. Also, as I stated above...this is not finished. Don't pull out your pitchforks yet, I assure you there is still more to the story. Whether it be good or bad, truly is up to the reader in the next chapter. **

**Till next time~**


	11. Chapter 11

_'I felt cold, like I was being drenched in falling snow. A familiar scent lingered on my clothing, but it wasn't my own, and all I knew was that something had changed. I hurt. Everywhere. Like a part of me had been torn out from inside. I threw aside my apathy and I used the Hijutsu for you, but...who are you?'_

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_**A/N: Well everyone, i'm officially taking over from here on out with the exception of one scene. Again, thank you for your kind reviews and loyalty to the story ((even if I did receive a few death threats!)). It's all greatly appreciated. I hold the highest respect to you all for your lack of judgement and for the kindness you've shown me from he beginning. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart. Enjoy.****

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_**'Are you happy with your decision, Miharu?'**_

**His eyes slid open slowly, a blinding blue clouding his vision. They stung, ached as if he'd been crying, yet he couldn't recall doing so. Here, his lungs failed him. No water was present, but he held the sensations of drowning, wave and tide tugging him harshly under, deeper into the depths of his foggy mind.**

**'What did I do...?'**

**Miharu shook his head and lifting his hands to press over his ears. His head felt like it would explode, and he wasn't certain how much more he could handle. 'What happened...'**

**All that answered him was the gentle chuckle of the woman before him, eyes cold and distant. A smile lifted her lips, making her appear more sinister than usual.**

_**'How does it feel, Miharu? Isn't this what you wanted? In the moment your indifference failed you, you tore away a part of yourself. You refused to do what you most desired, so you refused the path of happiness.'**_

**'What...? Wait...I don't understand...my head...'**

**The woman faded into the darkness, leaving him alone once more. Blue was turned to a blackened haze, and all he could do was be. His knees buckled and met with the ground, hands pressing more firmly to his head. He hurt. Tears fell freely from his eyes now, disappearing into the fog.**

**'I'm drowning...I feel like i'm drowning and no one is here to pull me out of the water...'**

**Alone. Broken.**

**Suddenly his eyes shot up when something caught his attention, only to fade just as fast. What was it? Was someone there? He could have sworn he'd seen a figure, but as he lifted his view, he found the he was alone still.**

**Still...**

The sensation of a gentle paw upon his thigh, kneading softly with a hint of claw drew him back to reality. His eyes fell to it, though no smile met his lips even to the friendly kitten's expression and tiny mewl of curiosity. Yoite, this small kitten he'd met just moments ago thanks to Yukimi, who had apparently rescued the tiny creature not long before. It was strange, and something held an odd sense of familiarity with it, but what aspect exactly, he couldn't tell.

His body was groggy with the knowledge that he'd been unconscious for so long. According to Kouichi earlier that morning, the amount of time that had passed was nearly a month. An entire month since 'that' time. Although the short reunion was pleasant enough, as was the knowledge that Yukimi had survived, perhaps not come back in one piece, but survived nonetheless, the boy still couldn't ignore the urge to retreat into himself the moment he'd gotten a chance.

Lifting his hand just enough, his fingertips rubbed along Yoite's ear feather-light, watching as the peculiar thing yawned and stretched, only pausing when both heard the door slide open.

Forest green met icy blue as Miharu glanced to see Yukimi, whose expression was unreadable, almost expressionless. Unlike him.

The man settled down beside the other, having broken contact just a moment after arriving and handing Miharu. Yoite made his way over to the man easily enough, purring gentle and low as it crawled into his lap to cul against him, small paws returning to the kneading they'd begun on Miharu before. If cats could smile, it was certain this one would have.

For what felt like years, neither male chose to speak. Both minds were reeling, and the silence was enveloping them in its chilled grasp. All that was heard was their gentle breaths before the man finally voiced his thoughts.

"Alright kid, what's up?"

Miharu said nothing, keeping his eyes fixated now on his own hands which rested on his knees. How could he explain what he'd been feeling, he wondered. Who would believe him? Then again, no one, not even Kouichi whom he'd practically interrogated earlier that morning would tell him just what was going on. Perhaps the boy didn't know himself, or perhaps he knew too much and simply refused to give out such information. Either way the situation was frustrating.

"Somethings up." The blond attempted again, though this time, with success.

Miharu kept his eyes low as he spoke, his voice soft as usual, yet holding a hint of a waver. Indeed, something was different. Off. He'd felt it the second he woke up earlier that day. "Yukimi-san. Do you think...is it possible to erase something that was here before? Even if its' something that made an impact..." the boy paused, hands curling into fists. "I think I did something, but I..."

Yukimi found himself frowning at first, watching the boy with interest before his eyes too fell to the floor as he contemplated the words. It was true, that something had undoubtedly felt different since that day in the snow, just a month beforehand. He'd gone against Kairoushou, but it seemed that his reasoning for the actions were blurred. There must have been a larger reason, and yet...

"So this fuzzy feeling i'm having...its' not because I lost my arm. The hijutsu...I guess that's what happens when you use the hijutsu." His brows knitted together thoughtfully, catching Miharu's look finally when he lifted his head, fingertips tapping his chin in thought. "It kind of resembles ten years ago...The owner of the hijutsu from ten years ago also erased a 'memory' from the world of Nabari. Well, maybe the influence and meaning might be different from that though..."

No...that wasn't it. Something was different. Something was off. Something absolutely wasn't right. Someone who had once been here, once found their way into both of the male's hearts was missing...and Miharu was positive he was the reason for it. The events of the past several months seemed muddled...strange. Why couldn't he remember everything? So little made sense anymore, and it only lead to more questions.

"Memory..." he whispered to himself. "No...I had promised to erase that person's 'existence'. I feel...like I promised. Not just the memories...the past and everything."

'I promised you, didn't I? I wish I could remember your face. Even your scent has faded by now. I didn't...'

"But that's kinda strange. To erase an existence also means that you have to erase even the truth that you erased him, right? But you remember that you erased that person. I also know that I forgot...right?"

'Are you still here somewhere?'

_**'Are you truly happy with this...?'**_

Miharu couldn't help but to bite his lower lip. Those feelings were returning. He was torn...

'It didn't happen in time, but it ended up like you wanted...But...what didn't happen in time...? What did _I_ want?'

"I did it not just for that person...but also for myself. Wished...I wished..."

All over again, he was drowning. A once extended hand was gone...and he lost himself to the waves. For the first time in his life, he was overwhelmed with emotions to the point that air eluded his lungs. He pulse quickened and slowed all at once, and he honestly wanted to give in. Curl up along the floor until he could muster his final breath.

'I didn't want to erase that person's existence, because...I wanted us to live together. So why did I choose this...?'

He brought his hand to his face, gazing almost longingly and lost at his palm. Something once there was gone, just as this person. Even though he knew not what once was, he longed for it all the same.

"Why did I choose this..." he whispered once more out loud, "I wasn't strong..." 'I want to die...' "If that person's memories or resemblance were left, I would surely..." 'not be able to live...'

The boy lurched forward as he gave in. Bitter tears slipped freely now from his eyes to taint the once clean cheeks, gripping an tearing at him from every angle. A trembling mass falling so easily against Yukimi's chest, begging in a way for a comforting hold. "But why...even though I forgot, it's almost as if my heart is hollow..."

"I don't plan on blaming you for what you did." Yukimi brought a hand to gently ruffle the boy's hair, frowning ahead of him. "If it made you, who was always indifferent, use the hijutsu, then that person's presence must have been important to you. Shouldn't it be fine to just explain it as having been for both you and that person? Until you can stand up and walk properly again...yeah? Maybe that person is living somewhere and you'll meet again somewhere random."

'Somewhere...are you out there? Are you here? I can't do this. I have to know. I need you now. I don't think I can wait...'

The tears fell harder as his entire frame shook to a violent sense.

Unbearable.

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**'Miharu.' the voice was tender and gentle upon his ear. The effect was calming, and yet he couldn't bring himself to give into it. Lately nothing made sense to him. He'd seen how Yukimi had his moments, giving into the phantom pains left as a scar from losing his arm, but all the same, he shared them too. It wasn't the same in that he had lost something physically...but surely enough, something, or someone who had been attached to him, was missing. **

**The sweet touch of fingertips to his cheek didn't even bring him to lift his gaze. All he could do was to stare at his hand, watching it as if waiting for something to appear there that should have been.**

**'Miharu,' the voice spoke gently once more, 'Everything is going to be fine, I promise you...'**

**His teeth gritted.**

**"What good are promises..." **

**Silence overcame the area as the first voice seemed to fade away to his question. **

**"I promised with all of my heart, but I...what was it? It was important..." his fingers curled into his palm as he continued to watch it. This hand was linked to memories he at one point must have chosen to forget, and yet...where were they? That thin line that once bonded him to something important was misleading. It hadn't snapped as he first thought it had...it simply had no ending. "Who are you? Why can't I think..."**

**What significance did the snow hold? White with purity, white with promise...promise of a future that would never come. **

**His heart sank more, if that truly were possible. Drawing his knees tighter to his chest, his head fell against them, arms clenched about them almost pitifully so. He was desperate to recall anything.**

**Something...**

**"You have to live." **

His eyes snapped open as he shot up from the place he lay. Every nerve was quivering within him, his heart beating furiously from his chest. That voice...

It was one he'd only heard in a fleeting dream. A dream he couldn't recall. His ears were ringing with its' tone, one that he knew undoubtedly had brought a smile to his face at one time in his life. He was cold, and hot, overheating in fact as a sweat broke out upon his brow. Throat tightening, he gripped at it as if to release the restrictive hold some invisible force had held on it. Images flooded his mind, some he knew, some he coudln't recognize.

Train car..

Bamboo..

Snow..

Hat...

What was this? What was...

Tumbling from his spot, he reached into the darkness with unsteady fingers. The groped, grasped at nothing in the darkness for several minutes before seeming to find what they were seeking, snatching the bag he carried from time to time, and stood shakily to make his way for the door.

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A pair of redenned eyes, accompanied by a set of gentle brown watched ahead of them. Kouichi's gaze remained transfixed on the stranger that once claimed ally, his shoulders squared and unusually tense. Raimei refused to break contact with the one in the doorway as well. Her heart raced and leapt, though whether it be for the best or worse, it was difficult to tell. Either way, he gaze remained transfixed onto the man before her.

Thobari Kumohira.

All remained silent for what felt like hours before Kouichi finally relaxed enough to break the discomfort. A lazy sort of smile worked its' way onto his lips as he held a hand up for the other in a sort of greeting sense. "Welcome home, sensei."

Thobari didn't speak at first, lowering his eyes for only a moment before raising them once more. He'd had his reasons for leaving, just as he had reasons for returning. However, something was missing...his reason for returning wasn't present.

"Where-" He began, noting silently at the way Kouichi glanced away then and Raimei chose to suddenly study the floor beneath her. The young samurai shook her head slowly, blonde tresses swaying a bit along her shoulders as she did so.

"Miharu isn't here. When we went to find him this morning, he was gone along with some of his stuff. And-"

"-A lot has happened since you left, sensei."

The room fell silent again.

To find the missing pieces of what once was would not be a simple task. Miharu, the young Nabari ruler had fled from his small sanctuary, though the reason, none could say but him.

Only time could see the events unfold...

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**A shorter chapter, i'm afraid, though I do plan to draw the next out. Til then~**


	12. Chapter 12

**I apologize in advance, this chapter does tend to bounce about quite a bit. Regardless that fact, I hope you enjoy ((and can keep up -laughs-))!**

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'This is why I don't deal with brats...' The blond stood on the balcony overlooking the trees. Miharu had been missing for nearly a day, and Yukimi knew the dangers that could befall him now more than ever. He had used the Shinrabansho, awoken its' powers, and to all involved in the world of Nabari, he would be seen as a nothing but a valuable strength to collect. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out the phone, eying it almost expectantly. "Why do you think I gave you a phone?" he grumbled moreso to himself than anything else.

Yukimi lifted a hand to run through his hair as he tried to think, watching the forming storm clouds in the distance. Sighing to himself, he turned to step back into the warmth of the room, settling down comfortably in his seat when his eyes fixed themselves onto something. A notebook, reasonably plain, nothing special. For reasons he couldn't say, he had chosen that of all things to take with him. He reached for it to run fingers lightly over the cover before they flipped it open.

Blank. All blank pages. So then why...?

Letting out a low sigh, his lips curled downward into a frown for a second before shoving the notebook away once more. So little made sense to him anymore, and it was beginning to dig at him. Just the day before, Miharu had explained his thoughts, and that he was positive he'd erased someone. Who was that someone? Why were they so important...? His head felt as if it were reeling with thousands of memories unseen to his eyes.

'I need more sleep...' he concluded to himself, though as he did so, his smile returned.

"Yoite!" He called for his small companion.

Nothing.

Quirking a brow, he leaned back in his chair in order to glance into the other room with curiosity written across his every feature. "Yoite?" He questioned this time. Still nothing.

"Damn it all" he muttered, snagging his coat from the nearby stand, throwing it over his shoulders and exiting.

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The boy nuzzled his nose into the scarf as a chill threatened to work its' way through his bones. Although winter was ending, its' frost still bit the young traveler relentlessly. Pulling the hat he wore over his eyes a bit, his gaze lifted to watch the rain patter along the windows as the train made its' way through the evening.

Miharu could hear the wind whistling outside, and though some would find it eerie, for some reason the sound of the night winds calmed him, like a memory of the past he'd once held comfort in. Drawing fingers across his palm a bit, he pulled his attention from it long enough to reach over for his bag to unlatch it, jerking away suddenly in start as a small, black creature popped from it the moment he did so. For several seconds he took the time to watch the cat, blinking when it took his mind time to register.

"Yoite...? What are you doing in there...?"

The cat purred gently, small paws patting along his thigh as it crawled onto him, leaning up on hind legs now to rub its' forehead against his chin and cheek, causing a faint smile to meet his lips. "Yukimi-san will be worried." Not that he truly minded. In all honesty, he wasn't sure where he was going. Something within him, an undeniable voice perhaps, or a calling of somesort was dragging him toward it. It wasn't like him to allow his emotions to rule him this way. However, it wasn't often he'd had sensations such as these. It frightened him in a way, and it was nice to have some form of companion along for the journey.

His fingers moved to rub the cats back gently as it curled up to sleep in his lap.

He smiled more, feeling his own eyes drawing heavy now. "Sounds are getting muffled and I feel like i'm in the dark..." he murmured to himself as green orbs fell shut completely. "But it feels like i'm in a dream." he murmured, giving into the sensation that was sleep.

The whirring of the train and the warm comfort upon him caused his heart to be at ease for the first time in what felt like ages. The train raced through the night, through the fog and across the path it had traveled so many times in the past.

Memories repeated in the tracks.

**'I can't seem to think clearly anymore. Dreams and reality are a blur, and all I can see anymore is an endless line tying me to a distant future...where are the pieces I lost?' he knew well where he was without having to question. He slept peacefully very little anymore. Memories, dreams, reality, the past, a possible future...they all meshed and blended so horrendously that he lost sight of what truly existed.**

**Unlike the previous, upsetting memories that flooded his mind when he tried to find rest, there was a type of soothing peace he found this time. Somehow he felt as if he were here, in the right place where he belonged. He couldn't hear the voice of the Shinrabanshou, nor the comforting woman's voice who had on occasion visited him. There was nothing here. Nothing but the warmth. **

**'Like i'm in a dream...' the words repeated in his mind, and he couldn't help but to smile at them.**

**Something was drawing nearer. Something worth reaching for. **

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Though the car had long since ceased in its' movement, the driver remained rooted to his spot. An unwelcomed emotion threatened to consume the gunner. Releasing the wheel finally, he stepped out, flinching as if the rain that fell were made of acid. Closing the door, he rushed toward the building he once called home. While he appreciated Kazuho's kindness of taking him momentarily in, he was also aware that he was intruding on her own family. Besides, if Miharu were to return on his own, something told him there was a possibility it would be here, to this place.

Sighing heavily, his fingers worked quickly to unlock the door, though as he grasped the handle, he froze. A heated chill, one left indescribable was felt through his entire frame. For the longest time he couldn't bring himself to enter, though by the time he finally did, his expression could only fall further. Since the long absence, the room had grown cold and dreary almost as if it were lonely. Somehow the place felt different. Something missing, or perhaps something that was there and unseen by the human eye. Yukimi shook off the feeling long enough to remove his shoes, shrugging his coat from his shoulders and simply dropping it onto the couch with little interest.

Wandering silently toward the kitchen, he reached into the refrigerator to take the lemons he kept there, taking a knife from the drawer and once more, hesitating. 'What's wrong with me?' he questioned to himself. 'The one who disappeared...was he concerned with this place too?'

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Bag hitched over his shoulder, cat in his arms, Miharu stepped out into the fresh air of the afternoon. His legs were stiff from the ride, and he had to mentally convince them to support him just so that he wouldn't stumble. The sun was bright now and welcoming, blanketing him in its' radiance. Yet...

He turned his eyes to the ground as something within him ached. Whether it was good or bad, it was difficult to say. The moment he'd entered this place, something within him felt like it would snap.

The town didn't appear to be particularly large, or small to him. Nothing special. A church could be seen in the distance, lead to by several smaller buildings and stores along the way. Was this the place he was being lead to? Either way, he stepped forward, knowing answers would be scarce unless he chose to seek them. Since he'd woken the day before, he'd heard several times that the past had happened, and the best course would be to ignore the tugging at his heart. Perhaps it was for the best...perhaps seeking answers would only tear at him more. He knew he was setting everyone else back, however, he knew also that he would be ignoring a large part of him should he choose not to take action.

Yoite shifted in his arms just then, causing him to pause in his spot. It wasn't like the creature to struggle when someone was so willingly giving it time to snuggle, and it threw him off guard even more when it eagerly pushed itself from his hold, leaping down onto the ground to bolt ahead of him. Staring after it, he gripped his bag tighter before following with a faint expression of question in his features. It's tiny paws met time and time again with the pavement, and Miharu's step quickened when it turned a sharp corner and out of his view. While he cared for the cat dearly, the last thing he needed was to have to explain how he'd lost Yukimi's pet. He could see the expression the other would wear as he fought not to draw a gun on him...

The alleyway he was taken down lead into another clearing, surrounded by more buildings yet surrounded too by grass and trees as if it were a piece of the town forgotten by most. Luckily for him, Yoite's black fur stood out amongst all else, allowing him to watch it with ease.

"Yoite-" he began, nearly losing all balance when he was made to stop so suddenly as the cat came to a halt. He blinked down at the tiny beast, disbelieving to what he saw. It was humorous in a way, watching as it batted at the grounded baseball with interest. Miharu reached down to take the ball in one hand, the other hitching the feline onto his shoulder with care.

"Excuse me..." A voice caught his attention, causing his eyes to lift to its' owner. Gentle features, light skin, raven hair to contrast it...a boy of a similar age stood before him, baseball cap and uniform showing his reason for being there. He didn't have to utter another word for Miharu to offer back his possession, tossing it into his awaiting hands.

"Thanks..." He began, though the boy's own eyes drifted to what rest on his sholder. "Yoite?" He questioned, taking another step forward, face brightening the moment the cat seemed to recognize him as well, not bothering to hesitate as it hopping into his arms. "Hey boy..." he smiled, although the entire unfolding scene confused Miharu entirely. Yukimi had said he discovered the cat with someone else...could this have been...?

"Do you know Yukimi-san?" Miharu asked finally, adjusting his bag a bit to his shoulder.

The bright grin the other wore was welcoming and kind, and that strange sensation returned to him. He was in the right place. he knew there was no other explanation. "Oh, yeah, we met a while back, finding this little guy..." he nuzzled the feline affectionately before sliding a hand out for the other.

"Koudou. Tsukasa Koudou."


End file.
